Parents Balancing academics with training and... life

[Aussie_coach]

I think you would find that they are less driven by scores than you think. I know we look at ours, and we see where our gaps are, but we definitely are more focused on the kiddos. Our leadership is great with focusing on the whole child and not just improving test scores.

And the day that our gymnastics associations place the development of the whole child above their international rankings will be the day we exact change in our sport.

The problem isn’t nessesarily the inherent nature of schools or of any particular sport, it’s the inherent nature of people and our society.

 

[Gymmom826]

Would love to get some feedback. DD just finished her first year of serious gymnastics, she's in L3 right now and is just turning 8 later this month and will be participating in competitions this year for the first time. She has been identified by the owner and coaches of the gym with loads of potential (despite starting "late"), and she has been selected to work more closely with the owner. DD loves gymnastics and has lofty goals, but at times also wants skip practice because of sore muscles and stuff like that. At this point, she will be training 4x a week, 14 hours in total.

At the same time, she is entering Gr3, and there is a homework requirement (albeit only 30 minutes max a night) but it's time nonetheless. Her training ends late on certain days of the week, and if she needs to complete homework, it will mean that the cumulative effect is that it could cut in on her sleep. It is of vital importance in our family that our children get enough sleep -- I believe that getting enough quality sleep is a non-negotiable at this age, as that sets the table in all other areas of her life (academics, recovery, muscle-building, social, etc). So we aren't sure whether this training requirement will also bump up against the requirements for school, and with sleep. We are fighting to ensure that she gets a solid 10 hours of sleep a night.

So would love to get some feedback from you guys. How have you managed to balance academics with training and other areas of life? What areas have you felt you could push back on. How have you managed to help your child keep up academically while dealing with an increased training schedule? And how about a social life?!

When my dd was age 7 and Level 3, she went from 4-8pm three times a week and Saturday mornings. I would pick her up at 2:45pm from school. She would have a snack and do her homework on the way to the gym. The gym was an hour away. She would get home after 9pm. She would have dinner and do any homework she may not have finished. She would get to sleep by 9:45 or 10pm and wake up about 7:30am. She would have about an hour to get ready for school which started at 8:30am and was only a few minutes from the house. What was affected the most was socializing. She would see kids at school, but didn’t really have much down time to see friends after school or weekends. She started not getting invited to parties or anything. So I would say that was the biggest issue. Everything else was fine she seemed to keep up with homework and had enough sleep.

 

[CuriousCate]

My 8 1/2 y/o DD is training L5/7 right now and does 20 hours a week. She is also in 3rd grade. Homeschooling is not something I wish to consider right now because it would be solely for the sport and I feel like age 8 is just too early to make such a drastic change based on gymnastics. The teachers have said 'no' to getting assignments early which shocked me. No time between end of day and start of gym - we have to rush to get her there on time as it is.

We needed to do something to make it better because the poor kid was just too tired if she didn't sleep 10 hours. So I found the math book on-line and bought it and we just help her to work ahead without any true guidance as to what's coming (we just go in order!). That means she sometimes does worksheets that would never have been assigned which can be frustrating to her. DH and I memorize her spelling words and run them with her in the car and while she showers. She "banks" her reading on the weekend (supposed to read 20 minutes a night, but instead reads for 2 hours on the weekend).

We don't skip fun school stuff (carnivals, parties, etc). She misses practice for Halloween and Girl Scout camp outs. Practice doesn't tend to run into birthday parties since she's done at lunch on Saturdays, so that's been nice. She does a lot of sleepovers with gym friends from Friday to Saturday (go home together Friday evening and back together Saturday morning!) so she doesn't feel the impact of missing out of some of the weekend sleepovers with school friends.

So far, this is the best solution we've found... Hope it helps!

 

[mommyof1]

30 minutes of daily homework should not be a problem if your child learns to do it efficiently. This includes doing it at the right time of day when she has energy and can concentrate. For my kid, this means not leaving homework until after practice, or even until after dinner on a non-gym day. At that time of day she's just too exhausted to focus, meaning that homework takes three or four times as long as it should and frequently ends in a meltdown. On the rare occasion when homework or studying is left until after practice, it's usually better to make her go to bed and then finish the work in the morning before school.

Over the years my kid has learned to get homework done in the library before school, during homeroom, and at her after-school program on non-gym days. She has also learned to plan ahead so she doesn't have to try to finish a big project on a meet weekend.

 

[Outsider]

I am always surprised by the fact that people (both teacher as parents) focus so much on homework, especially in the US. Not saying that those who have children who do get homework should not care, but I have had more than one (American) parent asking for homework over the last years. Working as a year 3 teacher (7-8 year olds), I never give homework for the next day. I do sign all children up for an online program that helps them improve their spelling, with the advice of practicing this 4/5 times a week for about 15 minutes (can be done on computer or tablet) and I do tell parents to read to and with their children every day if possible, but non of it is required to succeed. Reading does also mean reading recipes, news articles, subtitles or even traffic signs. I do ask parents to practice the Times Tables, but they are free in how they do it; singing songs, practicing in the car of even using fun apps. By the end of the year, we sometimes start giving out workbooks as homework, but even this means a single page of math problems for which they have a full week. And the whole point of that is to teach children to take care of their work when they bring it home and to bring things back in on time. Only when children are in year 5/6 homework is handed out twice a week, but even then never more than 2 pages (30 - 60 minutes of work). School is from 8:30 - 15:00 and on Wednesdays till 13:00, but children here do not score any lower than those in the US or UK.

If you have a child struggling, it might make sense to see if, together with the child's teacher, you can find the goals for the homework assignments. Cause if it is to learn the spellingwords or times tables, you might have different ways to practice, without the whole stress of finishing assignments in time! Feel free to ask for websites ect. if you want to, I might know some that could help and working on a tablet while in the car is much easier than filling in answers with a pencil.

 

[raenndrops]

I am always surprised by the fact that people (both teacher as parents) focus so much on homework, especially in the US. Not saying that those who have children who do get homework should not care, but I have had more than one (American) parent asking for homework over the last years. Working as a year 3 teacher (7-8 year olds), I never give homework for the next day. I do sign all children up for an online program that helps them improve their spelling, with the advice of practicing this 4/5 times a week for about 15 minutes (can be done on computer or tablet) and I do tell parents to read to and with their children every day if possible, but non of it is required to succeed. Reading does also mean reading recipes, news articles, subtitles or even traffic signs. I do ask parents to practice the Times Tables, but they are free in how they do it; singing songs, practicing in the car of even using fun apps. By the end of the year, we sometimes start giving out workbooks as homework, but even this means a single page of math problems for which they have a full week. And the whole point of that is to teach children to take care of their work when they bring it home and to bring things back in on time. Only when children are in year 5/6 homework is handed out twice a week, but even then never more than 2 pages (30 - 60 minutes of work). School is from 8:30 - 15:00 and on Wednesdays till 13:00, but children here do not score any lower than those in the US or UK.

If you have a child struggling, it might make sense to see if, together with the child's teacher, you can find the goals for the homework assignments. Cause if it is to learn the spellingwords or times tables, you might have different ways to practice, without the whole stress of finishing assignments in time! Feel free to ask for websites ect. if you want to, I might know some that could help and working on a tablet while in the car is much easier than filling in answers with a pencil.

Years ago, we had a parent who was also a math teacher. Her daughter would get math homework and if mom thought it was just busy work or too much, then she would have her daughter do certain problems (if there were different types, she would have her do some of each) ... then mom would do the rest ... and include a note to the teacher that explained that her daughter has demonstrated understanding of the concepts ... so she did not feel the need to have her daughter waste anymore time.

 

[mommyof1]

Years ago, we had a parent who was also a math teacher. Her daughter would get math homework and if mom thought it was just busy work or too much, then she would have her daughter do certain problems (if there were different types, she would have her do some of each) ... then mom would do the rest ... and include a note to the teacher that explained that her daughter has demonstrated understanding of the concepts ... so she did not feel the need to have her daughter waste anymore time.

This would never, ever fly in our school district. There is unfortunately a lot of busywork assigned in elementary school, and the only real solution is to teach the kid to recognize what has educational value and what is busywork, then give each assignment the attention it truly deserves. This is really difficult for some kids, especially at that age. When my daughter was in fifth grade she would insist on spending hours on some busywork assignments instead of the few minutes they really needed, then rush through other more meaningful work because she was tired. Fortunately, now that she is in middle school the assignments tend to be substantive, and she has mostly learned how to prioritize.

 

[Aussie_coach]

The idea of schools giving busywork for homework is ridiculous and pointless. Plenty of research has shown that giving homework in the lower elementary levels is in fact counter productive to learning. It makes learning a chore for the kids and they have found that kids who do no homework progress better than kids who do homework. In the upper elementary levels it is found to make zero difference, either way to progress. So here are kids having to jump through these pointless academic hoops, for no more benefit than showing that they are compliant students.

Contrary to popular belief, school and academics are not the most important aspect of a child's life. Sure, they are important but here are many other life skills kids need to devote time to learning. Time outside of school should be for developing those life skills, sports and physical development, social development, exploring passions and interests, helping in the home, rest and relaxation, spritual development and so on.

 

[Outsider]

Exactly that, Aussie_coach! And apart from being useless busywork for children, I find it way to much work for the teacher as well; preparing, checking, correcting. Any teacher who does it 'because schools handout homework' should think twice. Working in a mixed school (we have both an international and a 'normal' program in one building), we do share a lot of the knowledge we have from using the different systems. We follow our national curriculum while the international follows the British Curriculum. Teacher are from all over the world. One off the biggest eye-openers are the fact that despite the fact that children in the British program, who start reading and writing at 4/5yo and homework at the age of 6, while our national curriculum has 2 years of basically playing and structured games and crafts and starts reading and writing at 6/7yo with NO homework, at the end of year 3 (8yo), the level is absolutely the same. Same for math. The biggest difference? Children who are following the national curriculum seem to have far better motor skills (fine and gross; from cutting, colouring, playing in the sand pit as well as running and jumping outside a lot more), better social skills (solving fights in the playground) and are much happier in school.

Any school or schooldistrict that still has teachers handing out busywork, should work on improving their education. First because it doesn't make any sense for the children to do so and second because it means teachers waste far too much time on copying, checking, correcting... They should use that time on making great engaging lessons and looking at the children real needs.

@mommyof1; the whole goal of educating a child should be making that child aware of what they need to know! Trust me; seven-year-olds are absolute capable to understand the fact that they need to know their facts up till 20, if you take the time to teach time why they need it. I just tell the parents of my students ánd my students what I expect. I tell them why it makes sense to know the time tables by heart. And I do tell them when they need to know (like: end of the year). During the year I occasionally 'test' their knowledge and have the children correct and evaluate their own work, so they know what to work on at home. Over the years, I discovered the more control I gave the kids, the better they became. Today I handed out the list of homework for this first part of the year. Things on that list are: Read: as much as you can. Books, magazines, comics, recipes whatever, but grow your brain! Math: play games, mention the time as often as you can, talk about numbers on licence plates and houses, help your parents cook dinner and be the one who pays in the shops. Hang a poster of the times tables in your toilet and practice every time you go for nr2. Vocabulary: Try to do, see, taste and talk about new stuff as often as you can. Have your parent read to you and watch good informative tv-programs. Play outside: the best way to develop both social and gross motor skills. Or even bigger; learn life-skills. The only 'real' program is an online program to practice spelling words.

 

[raenndrops]

This would never, ever fly in our school district. There is unfortunately a lot of busywork assigned in elementary school, and the only real solution is to teach the kid to recognize what has educational value and what is busywork, then give each assignment the attention it truly deserves. This is really difficult for some kids, especially at that age. When my daughter was in fifth grade she would insist on spending hours on some busywork assignments instead of the few minutes they really needed, then rush through other more meaningful work because she was tired. Fortunately, now that she is in middle school the assignments tend to be substantive, and she has mostly learned how to prioritize.

The school district this particular family was in now assigns less busy work in lower elementary.
The mother, being a teacher herself with (at the time) a recently earned Master's degree actually did a presentation for the school board that January ... because of all the math busy work being assigned. She presented the findings of multiple studies that demonstrated that it makes no difference on the educational outcome if a child did homework or not. The school board was impressed - not enough to stop the busy work, but enough to limit it.
At two of the elementary schools (K-3 buildings) in that district, the only homework they get (other than reading something) is anything they don't finish up during class time.