M
msl529
Well, dd has made her decision. She is going to compete L6 in the Fall, and then re-evaluate & decide if she wants to do a Winter season as a Prep-Opt.
As you may remember, she was getting the 'quitties' in mid-June. I decided my approach, at least for a while, would be to tell her she HAD to stick w/ gym, at least thru Fall season. I wanted to see if this would help her fix her attitude a bit. It didn't! She got even grumpier about going to gym. I got tired of forcing this miserable, stubborn child in HER sport/decision, so I had planned to sit & chat w/ her, and let her decide when her last day would be.
However, just before I was able to chat w/ her, we had two coaches (married, so they go as a pair) exit the gym very abruptly, w/ a hefty dose of drama thrown in on the side (I am always sad when some coaches act this way!). Needless to say, the gymnasts, parents AND gym owners were left saddened and stunned. Additionally, the owners were left scrambling to find new coaches. One of the coaches who left was my daughter's favorite; the other had been discouraging/lecturing the girls daily about their 'bad' beam performances, and everyone in my dd's group was LOSING beam skills.
Well, God Bless our owners, they managed to rustle up a great coach the very next day after all the drama hit! So now, in place of grumpy beam coach, there is a young, energetic female coach, who's a recent college grad and who even competed on a college gym team for a short while.
Suddenly, all the girls were feeling MUCH better on beam, no surprise there! And this new coach made the rest of their workout a lot more fun and challenging. Also, as a result of the coaching change, one of the other coaches generously stepped up his committment & is now the team coordinator. He is a great coach, not only b/c he is our State Judging Director , but the thing I love about him most is he really cares about each girl, w/ her unique set of strengths & talents. When you watch him out there coaching, you can see he is just having the best time, he really loves coaching. All this to say, that I think we are going to see some really awesome coaching this year, and also some very happy, well-trained gymnasts. I guess sometimes these dramas do serve their purpose, although it was not right that so many feelings got hurt in the process.
So around the time of the drama/ gym changes, I sat dd down and said, "ok, you have my blessing, when would you like your last day to be?". Her reply? "I think I should stick w/ it some more mom, I'm not ready to quit yet".
I guess one of the main things that was bothering her was the negative coaching on beam. The other, which will still be a challenge, is the M-F schedule. DD feels like she has no 'down-time' to just chill/goof off. Duh, I know this goes along w/ being a competitive gymnast, but it still bugs her. I am not sure how I am going to handle this. On one hand, I feel that she has committed to her sport for the season, and she needs to go to as many practices as she possibly can. Her coaches depend on her to be there. But I also feel that if she wants to fudge a bit here & there, take a day off to vegetate on the couch, why not? She needs to be a kid sometimes. I think I may have some trouble w/ drawing that line. Do you think I should let her decide when she goes & when she takes a day off? Or is that too risky to put entirely in her hands? I mean, it IS her sport... Advice??
Thanks for all the support thru this dilemma, I learned a lot from you all, & you helped me feel I was not alone thru a very confusing time!
As you may remember, she was getting the 'quitties' in mid-June. I decided my approach, at least for a while, would be to tell her she HAD to stick w/ gym, at least thru Fall season. I wanted to see if this would help her fix her attitude a bit. It didn't! She got even grumpier about going to gym. I got tired of forcing this miserable, stubborn child in HER sport/decision, so I had planned to sit & chat w/ her, and let her decide when her last day would be.
However, just before I was able to chat w/ her, we had two coaches (married, so they go as a pair) exit the gym very abruptly, w/ a hefty dose of drama thrown in on the side (I am always sad when some coaches act this way!). Needless to say, the gymnasts, parents AND gym owners were left saddened and stunned. Additionally, the owners were left scrambling to find new coaches. One of the coaches who left was my daughter's favorite; the other had been discouraging/lecturing the girls daily about their 'bad' beam performances, and everyone in my dd's group was LOSING beam skills.
Well, God Bless our owners, they managed to rustle up a great coach the very next day after all the drama hit! So now, in place of grumpy beam coach, there is a young, energetic female coach, who's a recent college grad and who even competed on a college gym team for a short while.
Suddenly, all the girls were feeling MUCH better on beam, no surprise there! And this new coach made the rest of their workout a lot more fun and challenging. Also, as a result of the coaching change, one of the other coaches generously stepped up his committment & is now the team coordinator. He is a great coach, not only b/c he is our State Judging Director , but the thing I love about him most is he really cares about each girl, w/ her unique set of strengths & talents. When you watch him out there coaching, you can see he is just having the best time, he really loves coaching. All this to say, that I think we are going to see some really awesome coaching this year, and also some very happy, well-trained gymnasts. I guess sometimes these dramas do serve their purpose, although it was not right that so many feelings got hurt in the process.
So around the time of the drama/ gym changes, I sat dd down and said, "ok, you have my blessing, when would you like your last day to be?". Her reply? "I think I should stick w/ it some more mom, I'm not ready to quit yet".
I guess one of the main things that was bothering her was the negative coaching on beam. The other, which will still be a challenge, is the M-F schedule. DD feels like she has no 'down-time' to just chill/goof off. Duh, I know this goes along w/ being a competitive gymnast, but it still bugs her. I am not sure how I am going to handle this. On one hand, I feel that she has committed to her sport for the season, and she needs to go to as many practices as she possibly can. Her coaches depend on her to be there. But I also feel that if she wants to fudge a bit here & there, take a day off to vegetate on the couch, why not? She needs to be a kid sometimes. I think I may have some trouble w/ drawing that line. Do you think I should let her decide when she goes & when she takes a day off? Or is that too risky to put entirely in her hands? I mean, it IS her sport... Advice??
Thanks for all the support thru this dilemma, I learned a lot from you all, & you helped me feel I was not alone thru a very confusing time!