My dd has been competing 4 years in Xcel program which was the only program at her first gym. The HC who was also the gym owner, sold the facility and combined with another med-sized gym. That HC, who we adore and are still very close with, advised us after 3 years that my dd needed a bigger, elite level facility and Coaches to work with. She helped us evaluate and get set up at one of the top 2 in the State.
Going to a new gym, we thought it best to leave her in Xcel one more season to allow time to become familiar with new Coaches, Training Style, etc. She had a fabulous year; both in skills growth and competition results. Only one competition did she not sweep and she came in second on two events. (I say that not to brag but to give a profile of the athlete)
For the upcoming season we all agreed she would move to Optionals for a myriad of reasons, which considering the audience of this Parent's Forum, I am sure you understand those reasons.
Enter the challenge we are having....like most training facilities, she has a checklist of skills to score out on prior to switching. While she has the majority completed, she has about 6 basic ones left before the move. The HC and Asst HC are amazing. They are true experts in their field and the primary reasons we selected this gym over the other "elite" gym slightly closer to our home. HOWEVER, dd isn't working with them daily and is regularly with 3 other coaches. These 3 report back to the 2 HC on progress. Of the 3 coaches, 2 are quite the handful. They are VERY rude and snotty to the gymnasts. The issues I have witnessed include name calling, mocking the girls, laughing when they miss a skill, telling them they deserved to fall for being lazy, telling them they cant believe they "do gymnastics so ugly", flat out ignoring them, putting a hand in their face (not on the child) when they are mid-comment, not cheering or even granting a high five at meets when they rock an event, etc. (Not all of these were directed at my dd; just summary of observations.)
During a private parent's meeting with the HC, she noted that my dd doesn't seem to push herself as hard on the little things and they don't understand why she didn't progress more over the summer. I, in broad terms, explained that I believed a part of the issue might be a disconnect she was having with a coach and learning to process this. I made no accusations on what exactly was done or said, just stated there was a disconnect. I also pointed out that she stands a bit taller when training with the two HCs and we looked forward to working with them more. HC asked which coach there was a disconnect with and I told her. She stated she would look into it and certainly didn't want coaching to impact my dd negatively. I told her I did not want my dd babied or given special treatment but I appreciated her looking in to it. This was one week ago.
Fast forward to last night, my dd got in the car after practice and broke down. Mind you this child does not cry. She has broken bones, hyperextended knees, etc. and not cried. She is mentally very tough. She worked part of the night with one of the HCs and completed several items on her list. She was STOKED! BUT at the next apparatus, one of the 'disconnected' Coaches questioned whether she really completed a checklist item from over a month ago. My dd stated she had and was then questioned as to who signed off. She stated that the HC had verified. The 'disconnected' Coach laughed and erased the completion mark! This all occurred in front of the entire team and another Coach. My dd was heartbroken. It isn't even about advancing at this point. She cant get away from the two 'disconnected' coaches unless she completes her list. I believe the erasing to be punishment for me speaking with the HC.
My dd wants to leave the gym because of these 2 coaches. She said she will never get to advance out of these coaches' group and to be honest, I am leaning towards that same belief. My child is not the same as a few months ago. Her face is sad. This is a kid that sleeps, eats, and breathes the sport. She loves the gym itself and the HCs and her teammates but that is getting overshadowed by the bullying.
So what do I do? This truly is the top gym. The HCs and Owner are what she needs to meet her goals. But she is stuck.
Since she has only been there one season, I am afraid she will get blackballed if we leave. Also, how would I have her evaluated at the other gym without getting her kicked off this team? Is there a chance the other elite gym wouldn't see her because of her being perceived as a "gym-hopper"?
Going to a new gym, we thought it best to leave her in Xcel one more season to allow time to become familiar with new Coaches, Training Style, etc. She had a fabulous year; both in skills growth and competition results. Only one competition did she not sweep and she came in second on two events. (I say that not to brag but to give a profile of the athlete)
For the upcoming season we all agreed she would move to Optionals for a myriad of reasons, which considering the audience of this Parent's Forum, I am sure you understand those reasons.
Enter the challenge we are having....like most training facilities, she has a checklist of skills to score out on prior to switching. While she has the majority completed, she has about 6 basic ones left before the move. The HC and Asst HC are amazing. They are true experts in their field and the primary reasons we selected this gym over the other "elite" gym slightly closer to our home. HOWEVER, dd isn't working with them daily and is regularly with 3 other coaches. These 3 report back to the 2 HC on progress. Of the 3 coaches, 2 are quite the handful. They are VERY rude and snotty to the gymnasts. The issues I have witnessed include name calling, mocking the girls, laughing when they miss a skill, telling them they deserved to fall for being lazy, telling them they cant believe they "do gymnastics so ugly", flat out ignoring them, putting a hand in their face (not on the child) when they are mid-comment, not cheering or even granting a high five at meets when they rock an event, etc. (Not all of these were directed at my dd; just summary of observations.)
During a private parent's meeting with the HC, she noted that my dd doesn't seem to push herself as hard on the little things and they don't understand why she didn't progress more over the summer. I, in broad terms, explained that I believed a part of the issue might be a disconnect she was having with a coach and learning to process this. I made no accusations on what exactly was done or said, just stated there was a disconnect. I also pointed out that she stands a bit taller when training with the two HCs and we looked forward to working with them more. HC asked which coach there was a disconnect with and I told her. She stated she would look into it and certainly didn't want coaching to impact my dd negatively. I told her I did not want my dd babied or given special treatment but I appreciated her looking in to it. This was one week ago.
Fast forward to last night, my dd got in the car after practice and broke down. Mind you this child does not cry. She has broken bones, hyperextended knees, etc. and not cried. She is mentally very tough. She worked part of the night with one of the HCs and completed several items on her list. She was STOKED! BUT at the next apparatus, one of the 'disconnected' Coaches questioned whether she really completed a checklist item from over a month ago. My dd stated she had and was then questioned as to who signed off. She stated that the HC had verified. The 'disconnected' Coach laughed and erased the completion mark! This all occurred in front of the entire team and another Coach. My dd was heartbroken. It isn't even about advancing at this point. She cant get away from the two 'disconnected' coaches unless she completes her list. I believe the erasing to be punishment for me speaking with the HC.
My dd wants to leave the gym because of these 2 coaches. She said she will never get to advance out of these coaches' group and to be honest, I am leaning towards that same belief. My child is not the same as a few months ago. Her face is sad. This is a kid that sleeps, eats, and breathes the sport. She loves the gym itself and the HCs and her teammates but that is getting overshadowed by the bullying.
So what do I do? This truly is the top gym. The HCs and Owner are what she needs to meet her goals. But she is stuck.
Since she has only been there one season, I am afraid she will get blackballed if we leave. Also, how would I have her evaluated at the other gym without getting her kicked off this team? Is there a chance the other elite gym wouldn't see her because of her being perceived as a "gym-hopper"?
