Parents Am I being "THAT" parent?

[txgymfan]

Someone could handle email for the Head Coach. If you don't hear from him, I would call and set up a private meeting with just you and him. Go in with a questioning attitude and clarify what will happen next. Be clear and specific about your complaint with the difficult coach.

 

[flipster]

Two problems here: 1. getting to Optionals. 2. uninterested coaches. Will your daughter be moving to HC group once in Optionals?
The fact that HC has a plan is promising. Hope you'll hear from HC soon.

 

[mobeans]

I absolutely couldn't put up with that behavior for one day. It doesn't matter if it is a top gym or not the "disconnected" coaches are mistreating the kids. Children need to be built up not torn down, that is no way to grow their self esteem. I can't imagine that the HCs are completely oblivious to this behavior but if they truly are then something is wrong there as well. Id also be concerned that your daughter is not only negatively affected confidence-wise by these but she may come to want to quit completely.

 

[Anna's_Mom]

If you want to stay with this gym, I would give the HC one (and only one) more chance to make changes. I would request a private meeting with him and go in with a list of concerns and questions. Then listen to his responses. If you get any hint of "that is the way it is" or "that is the way they coach" then run. That sort of negativity can absolutely ruin a pre-teen girl. Not just for gymnastics but overall. I so wish I had moved my daughter out of a similar gym earlier. I didn't realize the damage it was doing until she started to fail at school because "coach says I can't do anything right so why try", "coach says I'm ugly/too thin/not strong enough" and so forth. This is a fragile time for girls and they need every ounce of confidence to move on to be well-adjusted, confident young women. You are also showing her that is is OK for people in power to be nasty and that she should just accept bullying. If these are male coaches she is learning that men can abuse her and she is supposed to accept it. She will eventually start to believe that she is not good enough. NOT something I want my daughter to learn and I'm sure you don't either. I don't care if it does make me "that parent" I will not allow my daughter to be harmed either psychologically or physically. When the gym owner was not willing to assure me that she wouldn't accept coaching behavior that had a high probability of causing physical injury or humiliation then I knew it was time to leave. As I said, should have done it earlier. After a year working with much more compassionate coaches she is back to having some self-confidence. She has started to look people in the eye again and try new things. She doesn't come home from practice in tears any more, she is back to smiling. I hadn't realized just how far this had gone until I saw her bounce back.

 

[Becauseisaid]

Update @Marie ? How is your daughter doing?