For Parents Attending travel meets when injured?

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Proud Parent
Jul 8, 2014
I'm kind of struggling here and could use some advice/perspective. My daughter (level 10) is injured again. We are still awaiting results from the MRI, but I'm not feeling terribly confident she's going to compete this season.

Her first meet was last weekend. It was a 5 hour drive and to a nice place, so we went and she went on the floor with them as a helper. It was fun and we had no complaints.

Her next meet is this weekend and is too far to drive. We already have flights and hotel. She probably wasn't going to hang out with her teammates much (she doesn't have a any good friends left on the team and her teammates that are still there are rather cliquey and don't include her) Of course she still wants to go, but it's just a lot of money and I don't really want to. The idea of not going feels to her like she is being punished for being hurt, which of course I don't want her to feel that way. But I could think of a lot better ways to spend that money than going to this meet.

She has 2 more fly away meets, one that we will attend no matter what (I like the destination lol) and the other I am also struggling with. If the meets were local or within driving distance, we'd definitely go to be a supportive teammate. But all I can think of is the cost of this trip, especially given that she isn't even close with any of her teammates and I honestly don't think they'd care if she went or not.

What would you do? Would your coaches expect you to go? She's been injured before and gone to the meets, but that was before her good friends retired and she still had fun hanging out with teammates. Now that she's older and not part of the group, it's all just a little more complicated to me. I do think the two of us could have fun together if we go, but I know she'll also feel left out by her teammates. Ugh. I have to decide today whether to go or not go.
It would be a no for me - especially with the lack of comradery. IF they were all super close, I could see the cost. But with your description - nope.

Tell her that she can go to the cool fly-away meet.

To make sure she knows its not a punishment - take a bit of the savings and have her take her besties out for a movie or something fun.
The idea of not going feels to her like she is being punished for being hurt, which of course I don't want her to feel that way. But I could think of a lot better ways to spend that money than going to this meet.
I would then plan something fun to do with her on meet day with her friends at home.
I agree with the above. Explain your decision and try to plan something fun to do as a replacement that would be worth it (you might have to get creative with that due to the injury).

She is probably old enough to understand, and giving her something else to do will help her still have fun on that day and not think about what she is missing out on. A plus, you don't have to spend the money in a way you feel like is wasting it, and then she doesn't feel punished for being hurt.
As long as it is not something like her senior year (in which I would say to take her to every meet if she wanted), I would sit with her and explain your decision, letting her know that you will do the drive ones and one flight one (as you said you plan to go anyway). I agree - if she were really close to the teammates and/or some rely on her leadership to boost their confidence during meets, I would be more motivated to go to the meets. Otherwise, I would rather spend that time and money on something she can benefit more from.
From a coach/gym owners perspective. If it was a local competition, I would hope that my injured gymnast would attend to cheer on the team. I would try to find a special job for them etc so they felt part of the team.

I would NEVER expect an injured gymnast to attend a travel meet, I would not expect them to drive 5 hours, or pay for flights and accommodation when they can’t even compete.
My ill gymnast recently attended our local meet, however our gym would never require someone to travel with the club team if not competing. But I will echo that even though it was bittersweet for my daughter to attend but not compete, the support for the gymnasts was appreciated by her team mates! I think especially if injured, I wouldn't subject my kid to the rigors of travel if not needed. What a great idea though about planning something else special for your daughter while the others are travelling!
I recently let my kid go to a travel meet with teammates when she wasn't competing. It wasnt expected or required but she wanted to go with her friends. If she was close with teammates I would suggest trying to find a way for her to go but since it sounds like thats not the case I would involve her in planning something else fun to do that day so its not like shes missing on a fun travel experience because she's hurt.
Thanks again everyone. We aren't going like I mentioned above. I'm a little surprised that no one would have gone, but I get it. I think the reason I struggled a little is because this is a pretty new injury and we were already planning on going. It was to Orlando this weekend. She's been excited about going since we got the meet schedule. We had the tickets and hotels. Then, literally 2 days before her mock meet and the start of the season, she got hurt. Last season she got hurt right before the start of the season too and it wasn't the season she had hoped for. She made it through the summer without getting hurt and was so close to having a great season and then this. I think she's been handling it really well, but she's really disappointed about being hurt and missing out and I feel so bad for her. But ultimately, it was just too much money to spend.
My daughter broke her finger two days before a travel meet from NY to Orlando many years ago in compulsory. We went anyway because everything was paid for, we were very close with the families and the girls, and well...Disney :)