Parents Bittersweet Day

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She did awesome! So glad she got one last meet! That was a great compromise.

What have you decided to do for her gym class? Will she do gym class at gym or can she get a doctors note excusing her for the rest of the year?
 
:mad:

I hope that negative coach is here on CB and is reading all our commentary on what we really think of coaches who demean children who are out there giving their all.

If not, perhaps a tip to the owner/HC to read this thread on his/her staff.

#timesup
 
Good! The HC and owner deserve to know what was said. Conditioning at gym will let her see her friends and stay in shape while figuring what's next. She should be so proud of all she has achieved.
 
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I was at gym today with DD I found this posted in a coaches room.
 
Just a quick update — i did speak to the owner about what the coach said to my dd. She was very kind on the phone, told me how much they all love and support my dd, told me there must be a misunderstanding and we should all sit down together and talk it out, as she hates that dd ended her season so hurt, etc. she also said if dd didn’t want to return based on what was said, she would personally call around and find another gym to transfer her mid season if she wants to go on to state later this month. She could not have been nicer.

So dd and I go in the meet with HC and owner. My goal was to have HC tell dd she didn’t mean the negative comments and shouldn’t have said that, even as motivation, and have dd end on a positive note. That is how the owner lead me to believe it would go.

We get in there and suddenly a coowner I’ve never spoken to and who has never coached my daughter comes in as well as dd’s junior coach. It is obvious things are going to be difficult and owner proceeds to accuse dd of making it all up. Then she tells us both that she no longer can trust dd and that protecting her coach is her number 1 priority at the gym — not the welfare and safety of the kids, but protecting her coach. And now she has to protect her coach from dd. It was soul crushing.

That was on March 1. I went ahead and paid for the month of March so they cannot claim we left owing money, but there is no way in %>*~ that my daughter will continue her off campus PE there for the rest of the year, at a place that calls my child a liar and that places the hurt feelings of a coach over the safety and well being of the children in their care.

She cleaned out her locker and said goodbye to her friends today. She is heartbroken.
 
I’m so deeply sorry that your dd had to end her gymnastics this way. I wish I could say that I’m shocked by how things were handled, but it’s all too predictable and dysfunctional.

Is finishing out the year in regular PE an option?
 
That's horrible! For the owner to treat her like that is inexcusable! I'm so sorry she is sad but glad you are teaching her to stand up for her self. I hope her gym friends are supportive going forward and they continue to see each other.
 
Just a quick update — i did speak to the owner about what the coach said to my dd. She was very kind on the phone, told me how much they all love and support my dd, told me there must be a misunderstanding and we should all sit down together and talk it out, as she hates that dd ended her season so hurt, etc. she also said if dd didn’t want to return based on what was said, she would personally call around and find another gym to transfer her mid season if she wants to go on to state later this month. She could not have been nicer.

So dd and I go in the meet with HC and owner. My goal was to have HC tell dd she didn’t mean the negative comments and shouldn’t have said that, even as motivation, and have dd end on a positive note. That is how the owner lead me to believe it would go.

We get in there and suddenly a coowner I’ve never spoken to and who has never coached my daughter comes in as well as dd’s junior coach. It is obvious things are going to be difficult and owner proceeds to accuse dd of making it all up. Then she tells us both that she no longer can trust dd and that protecting her coach is her number 1 priority at the gym — not the welfare and safety of the kids, but protecting her coach. And now she has to protect her coach from dd. It was soul crushing.

That was on March 1. I went ahead and paid for the month of March so they cannot claim we left owing money, but there is no way in %>*~ that my daughter will continue her off campus PE there for the rest of the year, at a place that calls my child a liar and that places the hurt feelings of a coach over the safety and well being of the children in their care.

She cleaned out her locker and said goodbye to her friends today. She is heartbroken.

Tell this story on every Facebook message group, Yelp, and other forum where you can name the gym.

#timesup

It's up to parents not to put up with this kind of crap and call these people on their sh%& so other parents can vote with their $$$.

ETA: I'm so very sorry this happened to your daughter. It is heartbreaking to read.
 
I agree. So sad for your dd. She did not deserve to have this with all she has dealt with. Grown ups need to be responsible for their actions and how they treat kids.

I hope your dd is happy with her decision to get out of there
 
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Oh no. I'm so sorry. I know this isn't what you wanted.

Weird that co-owner you didn't know existed & the junior coach led the meeting, and the original owner you spoke to, and the HC weren't even in the meeting. How screwed up! Why even have a meeting, if it's going to be like that?

Are you and/or she contemplating writing to USAG? Everything that happened at the end of your daughter's time at that gym is an illustration of the culture that needs to change... especially the bit about needing to protect coaches from gymnasts instead of the other way around.
 
Are you and/or she contemplating writing to USAG? Everything that happened at the end of your daughter's time at that gym is an illustration of the culture that needs to change... especially the bit about needing to protect coaches from gymnasts instead of the other way around.

Excellent idea. Write to USAG. Name names.

And while you're at it, tweet to Aly Raisman.
 
I wasn’t clear. The owner I always deal with and the difficult coach were there. But a coowner (who has never spoken to me before and has never coached my daughter) was there, as was dd’s junior coach. So it was a 4 against 1 situation and the whole thing was quite hostile.

Dd will be fine. She knows it is the right thing for her to leave. She knows it is not her fault. I think it is important for her to know that you don’t allow people to treat you badly.
 
Tell this story on every Facebook message group, Yelp, and other forum where you can name the gym.

#timesup

It's up to parents not to put up with this kind of crap and call these people on their sh%& so other parents can vote with their $$$.

ETA: I'm so very sorry this happened to your daughter. It is heartbreaking to read.
I agree. That us awful and that gym needs to lose business. These places need to be child first!
 
Congratulations to your daughter for her successful finish. Shame on that coach and the owner for their ridiculous behavior! I agree that you should write USAG so they fully comprehend how bad the culture is. Are you in DFW? If so, will you pm me the name of the gym? I want to be sure my daughter never sets foot in a place that would treat a hard-working athlete that way.
 

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