Bullying within the gym, and how you tackle this.

[UGVOICEuk]

Hi everyone I'm new to this whole gym social media world lol.. Be kind lol

Good Morning All
I'd just like to pick a few brains recently my DD has complained about being bullied in the gym, due to the fact I know girls can get very catty when there ready I decided to allow her to see her way through it, that backfired and the other girl cranked up her bullying to not only call my DD names to but tell her "she's a crap gymnast, and will never be good" I have no idea when this all started or where it came from. I just know my D was really upset and dejected by some of the comments although when I asked her did she think she was a crap gymnast she no... That pleased me because I'd hate to have a her confidence knocked.
I have spoken to her coach about this and has ensured me that they don't accept behaviour like this etc.. I was pleased but I still feel very uneasy.

Any suggestions in what to do if it starts up again?
And has anyone else been through the same experience with there D?

Thank you x

 

[floppycat]

It's for the coaches to sort out. Any more incidents you need to report it. Try and get as much specifics as you can. It happened to us, coaches said they would keep them apart as much as possible. They are never going to be friends but the bullying has stopped although once in a while she gets a catty comment. I did think about changing gyms if it didn't get dealt with, the number of hours they spend in the gym they really can't dread it.

 

[UGVOICEuk]

I know what you mean that was my thought they do spend a lot of time together in the gym, I'll just keep my ears open

Thank you

X

 

[OwlGalLiz]

Unfortunately it can happen anywhere in the world. We dealt with that (as did another family) from a pair of brothers (and their parents). Ultimately it was one (of several) reasons we decided to leave that gym. A few things we tried (to a varying degree of success) 1. Chatted with our kids to "ignore the bad influence", 2. Spoke with coach 3. Spoke with parent. It's hard when your child who lives, eats, breathes gymnastics is having stomach issues and dreading going to practice and it is not being addressed properly. Good luck, stay strong.

 

[2G1B]

We have dealt with it with my twins. For my girl twin, there are enough kids that I requested that they just not be grouped together. I thought it would be easy enough since there are 3 groups for her level, they are grouped by height and this kid is about 2-3 inches shorter than my dad. So you can imagine my frustration when they started new groups last week and this girl and did are together. At this point I'm taking a wait and see approach. Did does have good friends in the group and I'm hoping it will be OK. She doesn't want to change gyms.

For ds it has been going on for a year with 2 boys. It is to the point that before every practice I have to remind him yo ignore them. I have talked to the coaches several time to no avail. Ds is now wanting to change gyms and I'm leaning towards doing it.

 

[Libby's gym mom]

Hi everyone I'm new to this whole gym social media world lol.. Be kind lol

Good Morning All
I'd just like to pick a few brains recently my DD has complained about being bullied in the gym, due to the fact I know girls can get very catty when there ready I decided to allow her to see her way through it, that backfired and the other girl cranked up her bullying to not only call my DD names to but tell her "she's a crap gymnast, and will never be good" I have no idea when this all started or where it came from. I just know my D was really upset and dejected by some of the comments although when I asked her did she think she was a crap gymnast she no... That pleased me because I'd hate to have a her confidence knocked.
I have spoken to her coach about this and has ensured me that they don't accept behaviour like this etc.. I was pleased but I still feel very uneasy.

Any suggestions in what to do if it starts up again?
And has anyone else been through the same experience with there D?

Thank you x

The gym should have a designated child protection/welfare officer if the problem persists make a formal complaint x

 

[emilykatherine]

Our parents tell our coach and we get In trouble

 

[Canadian_gym_mom]

We went through it. The bullying ended up being so bad that my dd's behaviour turned poor at the gym. Only after we left did I find out the extent of the problem. Please keep a close eye on it. And don't let the coaches dismiss it as "not that bad", or them not seeing it. Kids aren't stupid and aren't doing it out in the open.

Also, at times the girls were friendly with each other. The coaches took this to mean that my dd was making it up and it was all on her. Even bullies can have good days. And dd tried so hard to make it work because she really loved her coaches and other teammates. But she felt betrayed by them that no one was stopping it, so she began acting out.

Good luck.

 

[gymgurl]

Can I just say I completely feel for your DD and It's sad to hear she's going through a rough time.

I was bullied really badly by a group of girls in my squad back when I did level four (I was older and was 15 when I competed level 4). It was all lead by one girl who would constantly call me names, tell me i sucked and that none of the other girls liked me and that i'm such a loser I might as well quit. etc etc. The bullying didn't end there it followed me home on Facebook and the like. I would go home in tears and think that I was worthless and was absolutely nothing. My mum asked me if i wanted to quit multiple times and each time I said no, that means she won. I am going to win this fight and sure enough she quit at the end of that year along with the rest of her posse and I stayed on and got 10 times better than she ever was. However, to this day I have not re-added her on fb because of the fear that she will start bullying me again.

We were older so mum expected us to be old enough to sort things out, unfortunately I never had the courage to speak up and I just focused on the training. The coaches didn't do anything about it (I find it hard to believe they didn't know, it was right in front of them) I didn't say anything and the girls continued on *****ing. They quit, i continued blocked them on fb, the issue resolved itself. Though I don't know if it would have if they hadn't quit. I am sure there would have been a major blow up and the coach would have needed to get involved.

Please make sure this gets dealt with as quickly as possible, I really don't wish what happened to me on anyone. It has caused me more pain than I would like to admit and bullying has lasting effects, especially if its on going. Talk to the coaches regularly and keep them updated on the situation. If it comes to it speak to the parents of the daughter doing the bullying. Good luck and hope the situation all goes all