Parents Coming back around (maybe)...

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msl529

In case you care to know the latest w/ my dd's (yearly, lol!) quitting saga....I have posted way too much on it, I apologize. I have nowhere else to vent/get feedback. Thanks for your patience & support on this....

She had about a week-long foray into seriously considering cheer as an option, which eventually fell by the wayside. Last night she said, "Mom, I think I want to go back to gymnastics." She is worried about the hours, though. It's more an issue of wanting to come home from school and stay home, & not have to run off to practice. She thinks she could handle 3 days of weekday practice, (i.e. having 2 weekdays at home sounds good to her).

I am thinking of approaching her new gym (where she has been rec tumbling 2 days/week for the past 2 months) & asking if they would be willing to be flexible w/ her schedule. They are getting the new HC after this weekend, as she'll be done taking a couple of her girls from her last gym to Regionals. The owner of this current gym will also be helping the new HC w/ the girl's team.

Should I wait one more week until the HC arrives, then approach them both? Or should I talk w/ the owner now? I have chatted w/ her a lot over the past two months and feel I can trust her. She is always saying how she loves my dd and I think she really hopes she decides to join the team (More b/c of dd's sweet nature & good attitude than b/c of her skills, btw!). I think the scoliosis issue might actually help us here, as well...

Do you think it will be unfair to the other girls to ask if dd's schedule could be more flexible? DD is more than willing to repeat L6, knowing that she may not get enough hours in to improve/move up to L7 (I think she is actually very nervous to work on L7 skills---trauma from the last gym!).

Thanks for any feedback. Do any of you have experience w/ a team girl having a modified schedule, and how did that affect the rest of the girls & her relationship w/ them?
 
I think I would talk to the owner now to get things started, then to both when new HC comes in. I think too once your DD gets back into the routine and is comfortable with the new team girls she will want to be at the gym more. One bad experience can sour anyone, I think she is just in that sour mode and will come around once she gets into the routine.

And Vent away that's what this is for. We've all been there at one time or another, and it lets the rest of us see we are not alone.

Keep us posted
 
I think that talking with the owner now is fine. Maybe find out what the initial response is. I think that repeating level 6 would probably be a good thing anyway, with the move, etc, something familiar, she won't have to work as hard coming back and should be able to do it on 3 days a week if they allow that. Hopefully they will let her train 3 days a week. I know at DDs old gym, you supposedly couldn't compete at a level unless you were training just like the other girls at that level were, which isn't fair sometimes. DD had a friend (who didn't want to compete anyway) that only came 2 days a week, missed a lot still yet, and had all her skills/routines beautifully.

I agree that maybe once she is in gym, has made really good friends and is into being at the gym again, she might go for 4 days a week.

Good luck to her (and you for sanity's sake) in coming to a decision!
 
I think talking to the owner at this point would be a good idea. I also think repeating L6 would be a good idea too. DD could focus on the finer points of the routines & have nice solid season competing L6. Without the stress of learning totally new skills or stressing herself out over L7 skills, she could focus on just having fun. Going into a level stressed out & nervous is a recipe for a poor outcome. Going in strong, confident & just having to focus on perfecting the "little things", all positives in my book. A good experience this year, may build her confidence enough to face L7 the next year. Not to use the back brace as a ticket out of practice, but I do think DD has a justifible medical reason to attend less practice. As long as she can keep progressing & improving with less practice hours. But you'd have to try it for a while to see if it was working on all sides(benefiting DD & team). Who knows once she gets back into it, she may want to go to all the practices. I think she's been through a lot of changes & had some bad experiences, who can blame her for not wanting to jump back in with both feet. I say have a chat with the owner, so they can start to think about it. Good Luck!:)
 
I certainly would talk to the owner now, you have established a nice rapport with her and she seems to really like your DD. At this age wanting to have some time at home is perfectly reasonable, hard to imagine with three weekdays in the gym that she couldn't do well. ANyway it never hurts to ask.

We have girls in our gym who only train 5 hours a week and do really well at meets, they are just very smart about using their time well.

Glad she has been able to get here on her own, she will enjoy her choice so much more.
 
I knew she loved gymnastics too much to just quit!!!!!!

I would go ahead (without waisiting any time and giving her the chance to change her mind ;)) and speak to the owner about modifying her hours. I would use the brace/medical reason rather than DD not wanting to be at the gym so many hours (the owner can look at that as an attitude problem....).

Repeating level 6 is probably a good idea, especially since DD wants to, or is ok with it. Having a good competition season while uptraining can be very positive for her.

I am sure she will do very very well with training 3 days a week. As you know, we modified my DD's schedule and she only goes 3 days a week now and is currently training for level 8. If the time is used wisely everything is possible :).

Go run to the gym.....
 
If she repeats level 6 I can't see other people objecting (just sing out about the back problem a few times to shut them up if they do) and she should enjoy it- she already has the skills. I think it is an excellent idea in everyway.
 
At my sister's gym the main owners have non gym related careers, so they tend to defer to the coaches a lot as far as day to day gymnastics decisions. Although I think in a situation like this they would completely support what you are proposing (but then they mainly got into the gym business because they were sick of driving forever to take their daughter elsewhere and I guess were having some concerns about the environment in the gym their daughter had been at). So they (especially the mom/wife) seem to be very concerned about too much pressure, too much time in the gym etc. In your case it sounds like the owner is more involved in the day to day operation so I think you could certainly talk to her about transitioning back into things. She may refer you to the head coach but she probably has some insight into her philosophies since she hired her.

As for repeating level 6, I don't have much level specific information as my little sister had worked her way through all of them before she came to live with us. I can comment on transitioning from no gymnastics to conditioning to competing floor exercise only to finally being allowed to work on new skills to competing four events again. Repeating a level may be a wise idea at this time. We did consider allowing my sister to drop back to L10 but ultimately decided not to petition for that and she's done a few mixed session elite meets and that's been good for her. If you have specific questions feel free to ask.

I hope you find a solution that is workable.
 
I am glad to hear she might be coming back.This would be a good time to get back in the gym with the seasons ending and school almost out.It is hard to say on how the team mates would react,I do know few of our opt. girls that are in high school are not full timers they have other stuff that they are invovled with .On my dd's team we have a part timer she pretty much does not train in summer come around Sept she starts with them again,but she has it in her blood(parents both competed in college and are the owners)they do not want to pressure her .Has of now it does not seem to bother the other girls.Also maybe you could find a gym that offers a more relaxed team other then usag?
 
I think talking with the owner is a great idea since it sounds like you have a good relationship with her. Then ask her to set up a very low key informal meeting with the new HC. I think you and dd(she's old enough) can then sit down and go over what dd is looking for right now and have everyone on the same page from the get go. Since this is a new team program, this coach might be very glad to have an experienced L6 and not have any issues with fewer hours. Then again she may say her policy is to only miss x number of practices and if you do, then you don't compete. Better to find out where the HC stands now rather than later.

Then you and dd can sit down and talk about the new program and if she's willing to commit to it-----once she says yes then no backing out for 1 yr. Its so tough at her age since she seems to want both---gym and more free time. I would let her "try out" the coach for a month or so before holding her feet to the fire since as most of us know, not every coach works well with every gymnast.
 
Thank you all! Some great advice here. I really appreciate ALL of it!

We are one step into the process. Owner is all for letting dd have modified hrs, at least while school is in session. IMO, dd shoud be able to get enough hrs in her brace in the Summer & still do full gym hrs., & still get some 'at home time' too.

Owner has talked w/ HC, and HC is going to call me to chat more about it (she's at Regionals this weekend, though). She is set to start at the gym May 1st! Yay!

According to owner, who was roomates w/ HC in college, and on a college gym team together, HC is all about efficient gym hours and individualizing training to fit each gymnast. She thinks HC will be able to get dd trained to the best of dd's ability w/ less hours, and says HC is kind yet firm w/ parents. So if there is any squawking about dd's different hrs., HC will surely 'nip it in the bud'.

I am looking forwad to hearing from her and will keep you all posted. :)
 
I'm glad to hear she wants to get back into gymnastics.Now would be the right time.She has a long time to practice before the next season begins.
DD gym was willing to let her go 3days/week when she was a Level 7.
She did fine with it.
Still only does 4days/week at Level 9.
 

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