DD frustrated

[sc-gymmom43]

My DD has become very frustrated with her gym this summer. She is hoping to compete level 8 this year after a highly successful second year at 7, but still lacks a vault. She is the only one at her level and is the highest level at her gym.
Half the summer seems like coaches focused on prepping Xcel team for scoring out.
Last year there were 8 Optionals, now there are 17 Optionals/Platinum. Gym is small and 2 of 4 weekly practices, the girls are on top of each other, plus trying to work around the evening classes. My DD comes home frustrated at not having room to practice and lots of wait time. She has hardly progressed since April. We are starting to worry that she won't be ready for the season.
We only have 1 full time coach. All the rest are part time.
We love the coaches, (hers got her to her to sweep 2 and almost 3 meets last year <3), but now I have to pay for private lessons to get her caught up. Even so, we don't even have a springboard mat for her to practice Yurchenkos, despite promises to get one.
She wants to leave the gym, and I'm tired of her coming home in tears.
We have talked to the staf & owner several times about her frustration and our concerns, trying to give them time to adjust to the new roster and practice schedule, but it's not getting any better.

DD wants to go to a gym that has girls at her level and higher, with state of the art equipment and great coaches. That requires a bit of a drive. She's ready to miss out on a season of competition in order to move and train to progress.
So how do we do that without burning bridges and being left with no gym at all?

 

[Sasha]

She wants to leave the gym, and I'm tired of her coming home in tears.

This is clear as day. You have nothing to lose at this point. Go observe the other gym(s) if you haven't already to get a sense and make sure it really is a good environment (coaches not disparaging athletes, happy kids and families, organized, etc). Then schedule a trial and go for it. Up to you and your relationship with your current gym how you want to tell them, but most common and safe advice is to simply not show up one day and send a polite email thanking them for everything they have done to bring your daughter to this point, and wish them the best. Leaving a gym for another one is like a break-up and it can go badly despite seemingly good relationships, so it is a risk to have the conversation in person. But up to you of course.

Your daughter very clearly wants a change. Sticking around is doing her no good. You tried your best! Time to move on.

 

[sc-gymmom43]

Thanks!

 

[MeetDirector]

SC -

You have already laid the ground work by expressing your frustrations and concerns and they have CHOSEN to do nothing about solving them. Therefore, you are completely justified in trying to find a facility that will provide the training your daughter desires. You don't have to leave on a negative, you are just leaving because they can't get your talented girl to where she wants to go. Definitely make sure the other gym is worth the drive, but I wouldn't have a single second thought about moving.

Good Luck.

 

[GymDad9.9]

SC -

You have already laid the ground work by expressing your frustrations and concerns and they have CHOSEN to do nothing about solving them. Therefore, you are completely justified in trying to find a facility that will provide the training your daughter desires. You don't have to leave on a negative, you are just leaving because they can't get your talented girl to where she wants to go. Definitely make sure the other gym is worth the drive, but I wouldn't have a single second thought about moving.

Good Luck.

Could not be said any better.

 

[JoyAvenueMom]

Sounds like it is time to move on. If your gym has no successful L8 or higher, it is unlikely your dd will be the first. She has worked hard and is putting her gymnastics ahead of friends, convenience, or comfort. If you can swing it as a family, find a gym that can help her meet her goals...and don't look back. You can be grateful for everything they have done so far without feeling obligated to hang around. Don't say anything negative about them...just that your dd has outgrown her current gym. Good luck!

 

[mariposa]

Now is the time to move. There's plenty of time for her to get ready for L8 at a new gym of she's strong on her other events. She might have a FHS vault for the first part, but I'm betting she could get a Tsuk or Yurchenko by end of season. You've given her gym time to adjust and get what she needs, they haven't done it. A nice letter stating you appreciate all they've done, but that she needs more, etc, keep it positive and that you're doing what's best for her.

Good luck finding her a new gym! If there are a few choices, try them all.

 

[Seeker]

In addition to all of the things already mentioned, the red flag for me is safety. It doesn't sound safe with overcrowding, lack of coaching and lack of proper equipment.

I agree with all of the other sentiments, but this is no longer a safe place for her to train. Try to move ASAP.

 

[UnoMas]

It's time to go...for a lot of reasons. Gym takes up too much time and money for her to be coming home frustrated and miserable. How much of a drive are the other gyms?

 

[duyetanh]

SC -

You have already laid the ground work by expressing your frustrations and concerns and they have CHOSEN to do nothing about solving them. Therefore, you are completely justified in trying to find a facility that will provide the training your daughter desires. You don't have to leave on a negative, you are just leaving because they can't get your talented girl to where she wants to go. Definitely make sure the other gym is worth the drive, but I wouldn't have a single second thought about moving.

Good Luck.

This times infinity. My goodness! Time to GO, and at this point you just have to let that bridge go down in flames if need be. You have done more than most people.

 

[sc-gymmom43]

Thanks everyone, we will check out a few other gyms. There are a couple not too far away. One I'm particularly interested in is 45 min away. My DD has her heart set on one almost 2 hours away, but my husband and I both work full time, so that one is unlikely.

 

[l.c.o]

Good luck checking out those other gyms. FWIW, I do agree with the others. Our kids put too much time, effort, and heart into this sport to come home unhappy about progress, and I'd be concerned for the future even if she DID quick get that vault. What about L9, etc? Wishing you the best.

 

[sce]

Thanks everyone, we will check out a few other gyms. There are a couple not too far away. One I'm particularly interested in is 45 min away. My DD has her heart set on one almost 2 hours away, but my husband and I both work full time, so that one is unlikely.

I hope she finds a gym where she can enjoy the sport again but I agree that 2 hours away is too far. Even if only one of you worked that is an unreasonable distance.

 

[UnoMas]

45 minutes away is a pretty typical/reasonable drive for a lot of gym families. 2 hours...that would be too much for me but I've known a few who have done it. I would definitely be looking in to the one that's 45 minutes away and see if they have the kind of program (successful upper optionals) that your daughter needs. Good luck!

 

[sc-gymmom43]

The original plan was to do a FHS vault and take the 9.0 start value to score out of level 8 at the first meet and then go to 9 with a fhs tuck vault. Her fhs vault is very strong so the fhs tuck should be easy and fastest to learn. Then she could work Yurchenko. She has most of what she needs for 9, but they don't work with her much on bails (since she is the only one that needs to), so we either have no bars for 9 or or no vault for 8. Or we do as many private lessons as we can and cross our fingers.
The gym that is 45 minutes away sounds like they can give her what she needs. I am going to schedule a trial with them hopefully this week.

 

[Natasha]

L7 to L9 is a huge jump.... has she been working any flipping vaults or drills or tried Tsuks? L9 bar routines are a whole different ball game too... Does she have her bonus on all her other events to start from a 10 for L9? Really if she is strong on all of her other events and has a very powerful FH vault, she could still do pretty well at 8 even taking the deduction in SV.

 

[gymdog]

The original plan was to do a FHS vault and take the 9.0 start value to score out of level 8 at the first meet and then go to 9 with a fhs tuck vault. Her fhs vault is very strong so the fhs tuck should be easy and fastest to learn. Then she could work Yurchenko. She has most of what she needs for 9, but they don't work with her much on bails (since she is the only one that needs to), so we either have no bars for 9 or or no vault for 8. Or we do as many private lessons as we can and cross our fingers.
The gym that is 45 minutes away sounds like they can give her what she needs. I am going to schedule a trial with them hopefully this week.

Wait, has she started learning the FHS tuck yet? If not HUGE RED FLAG. You need other coaches at least ones willing to learn. Not only is a FHS tuck the hardest flipping vault (hence why it is not allowed in level 8) it is also dangerous and not easy by any means. If she can't already do it to a competition landing height in a soft surface (pit/resi) she will NOT have it for this season unless an extreme miracle occurs and even so that's accepting a ton of risk.

Sorry but I'm really confused.

 

[Natasha]

Wait, has she started learning the FHS tuck yet? If not HUGE RED FLAG. You need other coaches at least ones willing to learn. Not only is a FHS tuck the hardest flipping vault (hence why it is not allowed in level 8) it is also dangerous and not easy by any means. If she can't already do it to a competition landing height in a soft surface (pit/resi) she will NOT have it for this season unless an extreme miracle occurs and even so that's accepting a ton of risk.

Sorry but I'm really confused.

I'm confused too. Was this the coach's plan to score out of 8 and go 9? and yet they haven't worked vaults or hardly worked a bail? I know you said she is the highest level, does her HC have experience coaching 9 or 10?

 

[peginer]

My daughter is 8, level 5 this year, and she has already been working on half on half off the vault with a mini trampoline, and working round offs onto a beat board onto mats. I'm surprised your daughter is at level seven and not having done Tsuk/yurchenko drills already. Your looking for another gym is much needed as it seems like her current gym has not been laying the foundation for her future levels very well.

 

[sc-gymmom43]

To be clear, we love our coach. Some of the issue is that DD refuses to flip off the vault with no block pit. For the last 2 years, she does a half on or ROBHS onto the table and will only go as far as landing on her back on the mats. We asked about the possibility of practicing with her coach at another gym with block pits, just to get her to TRY, but the request was denied. I believe she would have had a Yurchenko or Tsuk 6-9 months ago if our coach could have taken her to another gym once a week.
Both of her coaches competed FHS tuck. They had her doing some drills and said she almost had it without even trying. They are trying to work with her strengths, since she won't flip a tsuk at our gym.
She is constantly asked by other coaches why she is not doing double backs because she gets so high on vault and floor.
Being the only level 8, it's not really convenient for all the other girls to set up for bail drills during normal practice. She does timers mostly. Hence another need for private lessons. So level 9 this year is off the table. She flipped a tsuk and double backs off bars and floor at a camp in June, but not since.
To answer the question, no, her coach has never coached L8, L9, or L10. She never coached 6 or 7 before, either, and got DD to her best season ever last year. She scored 37s for the first time in her life. Every new level, she winds up achieving new personal bests. So, I can't complain about the coaching.