Parents DD gym drama :(

[htimcj]

So after posting how long DD has been at her current gym, 9 years almost 10, the head coach quit on Friday. I am really upset about this. Our gym has been one of the strongest gyms in the state with multiple L10 and strong performances throughout the levels especially in optionals. Now our gym is left with no one with ANY experience coaching beyond level 7 just when DD is starting the optional journey. There are still some good coaches that I really like and DD works well with there but I am very concerned that there is now no one there who has ever taught/coached/spotted the higher level skills.

DD wants to do D1 gymnastics. I know at almost 11 and L7 that there is no guarantee that this will happen since there is so much that can happen between then and now but without proper coaching there is NO way this can happen.

I realize that coaches can learn how to do these skills and teach them but now I feel like DD and others in her gym will be the guinea pigs. The new head coach is a FANTASTIC gymnast, national team, top three in the world type but as far as I know hasn't coached beyond Level 7. I am sure she has the potential to get there. The other assistant coaches are the same way. No real experience coaching higher levels.

To make matters worse the coach that left had no plan. He didn't really intent to leave abruptly but he has a temper and it sounds like things spiraled out of everyone's control and he walked out. He is considering going to the only other gym in town that has a very poor reputation for treating their gymnasts and coaches. This gym has been without a head coach for several years because of this treatment. The person responsible for this behavior will be gone from the gym for the next two years which is the only reason he is considering this option but then he is afraid that once this person returns everyone who came with him will leave again.

So now I am put in the potential position of having to choose between the two gyms. My options are to maybe follow old head coach if he moves but then I have to deal with some serious craziness or stay where we are with coaches who I am not sure can take DD where she wants to go. I and DD LOVES the gym we are currently at but I am afraid with this rift that it is going to get torn in two. I believe that most of our upper level gymnasts will leave and go with HC and with that some of DD friends.

I am just sick with this and HATE being in this position! Both the old HC and the current owner have contacted me personally. The owner to reassure me (or try to anyways) that they do have the correct coaches and will be actively searching for more qualified staff and please be patient. The HC to say good by properly, let me know that he cares about the girls, is sorry for how this all worked out, DD has great potential and what his potential plans are. So I feel like I am being pulled in two. DD is one of gym's stronger gymnasts finishing 1,2 and three in the state for the last three years and always placing top 5 mostly top three in meets. So I can see their concern.

I guess there really is nothing I can do currently since HC doesn't really know what he's going to do. He's not happy with his options. So I will just have to waiting and see just what happens. I just hate to see such a good program implode for such a really silly reason.

What would you do? Stay with the current gym with the uncertain coaching or go with HC who has proven results but could potentially be at a crazy gym?

 

[gymdog]

Don't follow the coach. Stay at least one year. It sounds like there is no problem with these coaches coaching level 7, so I don't think you have any reason to leave given the options are not better and this is a coach who just walked out on a whim. What will you do if he walks out at the next place? I would 100% stay where you are and the new HC sounds quite promising actually. Possibly better than the old.

 

[lhmom]

I agree with gymdog. I'd stay put for the season and see how things go with the new coaches before making any decisions. Hope everything settles down soon!

 

[EastCoastGymMom]

Another one in agreement with Gymdog. The new gym doesn't sound like a very stable or promising place long-term for your daughter, even if her old head coach is there. Stick with your current gym and get to know the new coaches - they may surprise you! Is it possible the gym owner and head coach would work things out and he could return at a later date?

 

[mariposa]

I would stay and see how things go, especially since the other gym has a not so good reputation/might have trouble in the future and you don't have many options it seems for gyms. The coaches can learn and grow with the gymnasts. Give them a chance. You can always change later, but hard to come back after leaving sometimes. One year won't make or break your daughter's chances, since you say they are capable of her currently.
Is there a possibility he will make amends with owner and come back?

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk 2

 

[Natasha]

I would stay and see how things go, especially since the other gym has a not so good reputation/might have trouble in the future and you don't have many options it seems for gyms. The coaches can learn and grow with the gymnasts. Give them a chance. You can always change later, but hard to come back after leaving sometimes. One year won't make or break your daughter's chances, since you say they are capable of her currently.
Is there a possibility he will make amends with owner and come back?

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk 2

So after posting how long DD has been at her current gym, 9 years almost 10, the head coach quit on Friday. I am really upset about this. Our gym has been one of the strongest gyms in the state with multiple L10 and strong performances throughout the levels especially in optionals. Now our gym is left with no one with ANY experience coaching beyond level 7 just when DD is starting the optional journey. There are still some good coaches that I really like and DD works well with there but I am very concerned that there is now no one there who has ever taught/coached/spotted the higher level skills.

DD wants to do D1 gymnastics. I know at almost 11 and L7 that there is no guarantee that this will happen since there is so much that can happen between then and now but without proper coaching there is NO way this can happen.

I realize that coaches can learn how to do these skills and teach them but now I feel like DD and others in her gym will be the guinea pigs. The new head coach is a FANTASTIC gymnast, national team, top three in the world type but as far as I know hasn't coached beyond Level 7. I am sure she has the potential to get there. The other assistant coaches are the same way. No real experience coaching higher levels.

To make matters worse the coach that left had no plan. He didn't really intent to leave abruptly but he has a temper and it sounds like things spiraled out of everyone's control and he walked out. He is considering going to the only other gym in town that has a very poor reputation for treating their gymnasts and coaches. This gym has been without a head coach for several years because of this treatment. The person responsible for this behavior will be gone from the gym for the next two years which is the only reason he is considering this option but then he is afraid that once this person returns everyone who came with him will leave again.

So now I am put in the potential position of having to choose between the two gyms. My options are to maybe follow old head coach if he moves but then I have to deal with some serious craziness or stay where we are with coaches who I am not sure can take DD where she wants to go. I and DD LOVES the gym we are currently at but I am afraid with this rift that it is going to get torn in two. I believe that most of our upper level gymnasts will leave and go with HC and with that some of DD friends.

I am just sick with this and HATE being in this position! Both the old HC and the current owner have contacted me personally. The owner to reassure me (or try to anyways) that they do have the correct coaches and will be actively searching for more qualified staff and please be patient. The HC to say good by properly, let me know that he cares about the girls, is sorry for how this all worked out, DD has great potential and what his potential plans are. So I feel like I am being pulled in two. DD is one of gym's stronger gymnasts finishing 1,2 and three in the state for the last three years and always placing top 5 mostly top three in meets. So I can see their concern.

I guess there really is nothing I can do currently since HC doesn't really know what he's going to do. He's not happy with his options. So I will just have to waiting and see just what happens. I just hate to see such a good program implode for such a really silly reason.

What would you do? Stay with the current gym with the uncertain coaching or go with HC who has proven results but could potentially be at a crazy gym?

With your dd only being 11, I would definately recommend staying put for at least this season and see how things play out. She has time, and with being L7 she should be good for the season. We just went through a change and if it could have worked for dd to stay at the gym for one season we would have waited to see how things at the new gym worked out.

 

[flippin out]

Since your dd is at a level that the coach has experience with, I'd stick it out a year and see what happens. You never know, they may get in someone fabulous for the upper levels by then......and you don't know what's going to happen at the other gym. The coach could turn everything around at that gym OR he could stay only a couple months and be out the door again (leaving you in a very bad spot), or he could be great there but the drama there just not worth it. If your dd was a level 9/10....then the decision would be a lot harder and I'd be very tempted to take a chance on the drama in order to have a qualified coach coaching my dd (or be searching other options).

Sit tight for this year, wait and see how things go. Keep in contact with parents that may end up switching their higher level dd's to the other gym/coach. Then re-evaluate next year and see where the better place for your dd is at that time.

 

[gymmomtoo]

I agree with everyone else--stay where you're at. She's got time-which means you've got time to consider your options.

 

[happychaos]

Bummer. I am SO sorry. I have no idea what you should do, but I would lean toward staying put for now. Good luck!

 

[Skadoodle]

Don't follow the coach. Stay at least one year. It sounds like there is no problem with these coaches coaching level 7, so I don't think you have any reason to leave given the options are not better and this is a coach who just walked out on a whim. What will you do if he walks out at the next place? I would 100% stay where you are and the new HC sounds quite promising actually. Possibly better than the old.

I agree.. Leaving to follow the old coach might be too many transitions at once for your daughter. Give her current gym a chance to pull through this and prove themselves. If the HC walked out on them I wouldn't follow. It sounds like his temper got in the way of what is best for the kids he coaches. They may very well be better off without him.

 

[JessLW]

You say the coach left at the gym is a former elite, top 3 in the world type elite? I'd give her a chance. The transition from really high level gymnastics to coaching is pretty natural for a lot of former gymnasts and coaching L7-10 shouldn't, in theory, be a problem for her. I know that being a great gymnast doesn't always make one a good coach, and that there are excellent coaches who never did gymnastics themselves, but it isn't like you've got the Mommy and Me class teacher suddenly thinking she can coach optionals. Give it a season and see where it goes.

 

[profmom]

Agreed with the consensus -- gym issues are harder to deal with than coach issues. Give things a chance to settle down and see how it's going at your current gym before you start thinking about jumping ship.

 

[MaryA]

I think following the coach would give a message to your DD that his behavior (leaving a job in a fit of anger without giving notice) is acceptable. You're in a good position because you know the gym she is at now can provide good coaching for at least another year. I think I'd hang tight, use whatever connections you might have to keep an ear out at the other gym, and see how it goes.

 

[munchkin3]

Give the current gym a chance. It seems that they have been doing a great job.
They may make some beneficial changes and it may work out very well.....
Give it some time....

 

[iwannacoach]

You say the coach left at the gym is a former elite, top 3 in the world type elite? I'd give her a chance. The transition from really high level gymnastics to coaching is pretty natural for a lot of former gymnasts and coaching L7-10 shouldn't, in theory, be a problem for her. I know that being a great gymnast doesn't always make one a good coach, and that there are excellent coaches who never did gymnastics themselves, but it isn't like you've got the Mommy and Me class teacher suddenly thinking she can coach optionals. Give it a season and see where it goes.

This pretty much describes my start many years ago, except I had no experience beyond a community center based rec program, and from there I stepped into a team program that had lost it's entire staff. I'll admit there were brief moments where I felt the pressure and doubts of being tossed into the deep end but it worked out well for the kids who stayed. The program went from a goast of it's former self, with no top line kids staying, to regional prominence in a span of 3 years and the first kid went to nationals in the fourth year.

It certainly can and is likely to happen with the support of the gym ownership, and up to this point it's seems the owners are in support of training kids up to L10. I'd stay and not consider it a "look see" decision. Get in, stay in the back seat, and let this new coach drive the car. You may love where it ends up taking both of you.

Lastly, it's much easier to stay than it is to come back after an ill chosen move.

 

[Fliptwisttumble]

One more vote for staying where you are.

 

[GymBeeMom]

SOunds like all the CB parents agree Let us know how it goes!

 

[htimcj]

Thank you so much for everyone's opinions. It is very helpful. It is so easy to get all worked up when someone starts messing with your kids dreams

I did get more information today at gym. After talking in more detail with the owner and with less emotion on both parts, I found out that our new head coach has A LOT more coaching experience than I had thought. I had only seen her coach compulsories and hadn't heard that she had done more. Turns out she coached the only elite ever from our state and the two L10 that just graduated this year with college scholarships were both coached by her until they both moved to our gym. Since they were coached under our old HC I didn't see the connection between the timing.

DD also worked with new HC today all practice and loved it. I did stay more than usual to see how things went and felt and was reassured that yes new HC knows exactly what she is doing I really shouldn't have been surprised with this :0 And even more important DD really likes and respects her and I think will thrive under her guidance.

So I am feeling much better about the whole thing and we will be staying where we are now that I know that yes there is a very competent and wonderful coach/person there to help DD along with her dreams. Now DH isn't as convinced yet but I think he will see that it will all be fine.

Also the atmosphere in the gym today was very calm and peaceful. I didn't realize how much yelling went on until it wasn't there. A little crazy since we are now short a coach but I think the girls are pretty fine with it and the parents that are worried are talking directly with the coach and the owner. I am sure we will probably loose a few girls when the old HC lands somewhere but maybe not too many.

So if you know any coach who needs a change of scenery and wants to work in what really is great environment and in a very beautiful area ( one incident of drama in 9 years is pretty good) let me know, I have just the place for you to check out

 

[JMACAZ]

So glad things are working out!!!