I am finally back with an update! Sorry it has taken so long- my fathers health is in decline and I have been preoccupied with this for the past two weeks (it has actually helped to put this perspective). I actually do have some good news to share . I did meet with the gym manager (without the coach) and really went over my concerns. She was very open and understanding and I do think she could see my frustrations. She did some elude to the fact that they were planning to kick my son off team, but that she did not want to do anything too hasty. She canceled our meeting with the coach, stated she would speak with him and that they would start to send us a weekly emails with updates on DS and share any concerns (or positives) from the week. She did also meet with DS separately and gave him an opportunity to get his frustrations out, which I think was good for him. I did get also get a message from her with some greater context directly from the coach about his concerns- honestly, they mentioned two things from last year and other than that it was a lot of generic things (he talks a lot, can be disruptive, etc). Since this has happened, DS was sick and we have had 3 competitions so there has not been a great deal of practice. DH and I are starting to now sit at practice so we can observe more and things do seem to be going better. Sadly, in watching and hearings things from DS, it sounds like the coach has found another "victim" to take his frustrations on and is backing off of DS. I hate to see this happen and I am not sure how long it will be before things shift again, but for now it seems just a bit better.
Ironically, and not sure if this is related, DS performance has dramatically improved in the past two weeks. He has gotten his kip, got his circles and his AA score jumped over 4 points from beginning of the season to the last two competitions. DS really needed this for his confidence. His team is also on fire and taking 1st place at the last three competitions (two of which have been very large drawing teams from multiple states). Our coach may be young and inexperienced but he is getting results. We are outscoring the other gym that is" the gym", and practicing 20 hours a week. Even DS has been outscoring the majority of their gymnasts (at least for the last two competitions). I spoke with the parents of one of the gymnasts that left our team for the other program and I could tell they may be questioning their decision. The feel the other program has better coaches and resources, but they miss the team dynamic of large group of boys all the same age that we have. It really makes me feel like we are where we need to be, but we have got to work things out with the coach. I am hopeful that we may have made a small turn, but we still need to further explore other options so we do have an alternative plan if things start to fall apart again.
Thanks again to all of you for the support and suggestions-they have all been very helpFul. I am hoping this has just been a bump along the road, but if it does become more, I feel better about my option.