WAG Discussion of abuse in USAG - Nassar

[LGnyc]

I agree. These situations are not the same at all. To compare them is ridiculous. These women and girls did not choose to be violated. There are other ways to punish the organization without further punishing the gymnasts.

I agree they are not identical, but why couldn't the solution be the same? Punish the organization but not the gymnasts by having them compete untethered. Just curious.

 

[tucktwisttumble]

I agree. These situations are not the same at all. To compare them is ridiculous. These women and girls did not choose to be violated. There are other ways to punish the organization without further punishing the gymnasts.

Although I agree with you, let me play devils advocate.

Like Aly said - USOC and USAG were quick to capitalize on her success (read: "cash in on a big pay day"). These organizations are nothing without the athletes. An all-out ban would force them to clean up their act - so they can continue with business.
Unfortunately the world operates business-first. Ever heard the saying "money talks BS walks"? I've seen parents on the boards saying they need to talk with there wallets first. That is this - just on a larger scale, with larger consequences for all parties (the athletes).

 

[GymFan96]

In one of Shawn Johnson’s YouTube videos (Best Birthday Party Ever) she says at the 10 minute mark, “It’s been a rough day because it’s the last day of the sentence for Dr. Nassar” and sounds like she’s going to cry. The cameraman prompts her to explain further and she says “It’s the USA Gymnastics.…all of the allegations.” It comes off as if she’s genuinely sad that Nassar is going to prison.

It’s so bizarre and mysterious how he was able to completely fool some people. Like what was his reasoning for staying away from certain girls? He obviously didn’t avoid all the “stars” or Olympians. So what was it.

 

[raenndrops]

In one of Shawn Johnson’s YouTube videos (Best Birthday Party Ever) she says at the 10 minute mark, “It’s been a rough day because it’s the last day of the sentence for Dr. Nassar” and sounds like she’s going to cry. The cameraman prompts her to explain further and she says “It’s the USA Gymnastics.…all of the allegations.” It comes off as if she’s genuinely sad that Nassar is going to prison.

It’s so bizarre and mysterious how he was able to completely fool some people. Like what was his reasoning for staying away from certain girls? He obviously didn’t avoid all the “stars” or Olympians. So what was it.

My theory: Maybe they had to complain of back pain / hip pain while he was there? If they went in for a knee or ankle, it would be harder to explain the connection between the "treatment" and their problem.

 

[Taxidriver]

It’s so bizarre and mysterious how he was able to completely fool some people. Like what was his reasoning for staying away from certain girls? He obviously didn’t avoid all the “stars” or Olympians. So what was it.

It’s not bizarre and mysterious for a sexual predator to be able to fool people, some of the worst sexual predators are highly respected and well liked people, that’s how they get away with it. If only they were very obviously perverted but sadly they often are very charming people.
Very rarely does a sexual predator abuse every potential victim they come in contact with, who knows why he chose some not others, we could try to guess but we will never know.

 

[profmom]

It's hard to know for sure, but it also appears that as Nassar got away with it, he was emboldened to abuse a broader and broader circle of athletes.

 

[Flippin'A]

In one of Shawn Johnson’s YouTube videos (Best Birthday Party Ever) she says at the 10 minute mark, “It’s been a rough day because it’s the last day of the sentence for Dr. Nassar” and sounds like she’s going to cry. The cameraman prompts her to explain further and she says “It’s the USA Gymnastics.…all of the allegations.” It comes off as if she’s genuinely sad that Nassar is going to prison.

You misinterpreted this moment. If you watch the video she made on the subject that was uploaded a couple days after this one she goes into more details about how horrified she is for all the girls and she's definitely not sad that Nassar is going to prison. She also explains that she hasn't been able to talk about it without crying, which would explain why the conversation you quoted cuts off so abruptly. The sentencing was rough for her because of what he friends and teammates went through, not because of what Nassar was going through.

As to why some girls and not others... who can say? I feel weird even speculating because truthfully, I don't want to be able to understand what was going through his head. It does seem clear that he became more brazen later on, and overall the 2008 quad seems relatively unscathed. My only guess would be that two of those gymnasts had parents as coaches and another had a parent who worked for USAG. Maybe there were just too many well-informed people around who were actually in a position to stop him?

 

[GymMom4]

Flippin'A, I agree with you. When I watched Shawn's video she seemed very emotional and upset that so many girls were abused by Nassar.

 

[GymFan96]

You misinterpreted this moment. If you watch the video she made on the subject that was uploaded a couple days after this one she goes into more details about how horrified she is for all the girls and she's definitely not sad that Nassar is going to prison.

Flippin'A, I agree with you. When I watched Shawn's video she seemed very emotional and upset that so many girls were abused by Nassar.

True. The thing I found a little odd was how she just referred to the situation as “allegations.” I probably read too much into it.

And yes I’d already seen her video fully discussing it. I don’t feel she had much choice in making it if she wanted to do the best thing for her public image. But she certainly seemed sincere and addressed it much better than Nastia ever has.

 

[Madden3]

https://www.indystar.com/story/opinion/readers/2018/02/08/larry-nassar-victim-mom-abuse-testimony-letter/319425002/

Sorry if this was already brought up here, I have not read this whole thread only parts.

I hope every parent has read the opinion piece in the Indystar written by the mother of one of the victims who was in the room when Nassar sexually assaulted her daughter.

To come out with this very painful and personal story is exceedingly brave and I greatly respect her for her guts and honesty. There is much we can learn from her story because of her candor about how she, like so many others, was utterly fooled and manipulated by Nassar.

In my opinion, her conclusion that “any” parent would have behaved exactly as she did even when her instincts were telling her something was off is not only not correct, it suggests there is nothing parents can do to protect themselves and their children from the machinations of predators. Yes, it is vitally important to be compassionate toward both the victims and their parents. However, “there was no way to stop this” is not the lesson we need to be learning here.

Predators can only be stopped when victims report to the proper authorities (which is usually going to be law enforcement) and they are believed and appropriate actions are taken based on their report. So we know how to stop a predator- and yes, it involves victims and their parents taking action that they very understandably are hesitant to take. This may not be fair, but it is a fact. Crimes have to be reported by victims or the criminal continues to get away with it. And yes, often the crime is reported and the criminal still gets away with it. And sometimes a parent or victim may be unclear if there even was a crime. But despite this, reporting must happen- even if there is only a suspicion. There is no other way to have even a hope of stopping a predator.

What we also need to learn is how to identify potentially abusive cultures and possible predators.

Some predators manage to go unchecked for decades by choosing their victims, and the circumstance of victimization - exceedingly carefully and by being masters of deceit and manipulation in order to go undetected. This would explain why it appears Nassar abused in some places and not others, and some gymnasts and not others.

Some predators use positions of authority and trust to operate. They may actively seek such positions.

Going above and beyond to gain gratitude and trust is a tactic. Being super nice and friendly to both child and parent in order to get them off their guard is a tactic. Taking advantage of a situation where parents and potential victim are for one reason or another somewhat desperate (such as when an elite athlete is injured) is a tactic. Being the "good guy" in high pressure or emotionally abusive cultures is a tactic.

Ironically, abusing in front of the parent was probably another tactic to manipulate and avoid being caught. Parents assume a predator would never abuse their child right in front of them, and children assume that if it is happening in the presence of a parent, it must be ok. So, abusing an athlete while the parent was present was another way Nassar manipulated both parent and child into an erroneous sense of "trust."

If we are going to learn from this horror, we are going to have to look with brutal honesty and with specificity and precision at the whys and hows. And I am truly sorry if that gives more pain to the victimized parents and gymnasts. But pretending there was nothing any parent could have done to stop these crimes from going on for decades is neither accurate nor helpful. We parents can and must arm ourselves with knowledge about sexual predator's methods, and we can train ourselves to be assertive and rationally suspicious- and in particular, to be rationally suspicious of anyone who has power or some kind of authority over us or our child. We can also learn how certain cultures attract and camouflage predators and that we must be particularly on guard if we must traverse such a culture.

Predators prey on those they think they can get away with preying on. Parents have to learn how to not be prey and how to teach our children to not be prey. Nothing will ever completely stop sexual abuse from happening, but there certainly are many effective things we can do to help prevent abuse. The more of us who learn this important lesson, the safer our kids and the kids around them will be. And people who learn these lessons in childhood will be less likely to be victimized as adults.

I thought this was helpful 'quick list' about how sexual abusers operate and what to do if you suspect your child has been abused. I do encourage all parents to investigate this area much further for themselves.

http://www.mosac.net/page/369

 

[GymFan96]

I just saw a photo of Nassar’s letter. I love the fact that Judge Aquilina refused to read the part accusing her of timing her book release with the dates of the trial. She never mentioned anything at all about being an author, which proved even more that she was not seeking any media attention or self promotion. <3

 

[amiandjim]

Where did you see it?

 

[LindyHopper]

I just saw a photo of Nassar’s letter.

How, when, and where was it released?

 

[GymFan96]

Where did you see it?

How, when, and where was it released?

I just saw a pic of the first page on the Daily Mail.

 

[Taxidriver]

How, when, and where was it released?

The photo, if it’s the same as I’ve seen looks like it’s from the sentencing where judge Aquilina holds it up in the court room and looks as if it’s just been zoomed in on.

 

[NY Dad]

I'm not sure if this goes in this thread. Also, not sure that it's anything new but I don't think it's been posted on CB.
NY Times article "U.S. Gymnasts Worry That Program’s Chaos Will Ruin Their Chances"
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/27/sports/usa-gymnastics-team.html

 

[NY Dad]

I don't think this was posted yet: Luan Peszek leaves job as USA Gymnastics official after almost 30 years with organization
https://www.indystar.com/story/news...ual-abuse-bela-karolyi-luan-peszek/382015002/

 

[GymFan96]

I don't think this was posted yet: Luan Peszek leaves job as USA Gymnastics official after almost 30 years with organization
https://www.indystar.com/story/news...ual-abuse-bela-karolyi-luan-peszek/382015002/

Wow. They’re dropping like flies.

Is Sam going to make a “FAMILY IS FOREVER” post, and start selling t shirts?? Smh.

 

[sce]

Wow. They’re dropping like flies.

Is Sam going to make a “FAMILY IS FOREVER” post, and start selling t shirts?? Smh.

This is a really tough situation for all involved. Many good people are also being hurt. But we should all be working towards a safe positive environment. Snark like this is not helpful at all.

 

[flippin out]

http://www.intlgymnast.com/index.ph...s-suit-in-nassar-case&catid=2:news&Itemid=166

When I watched her testimony I had wondered if her brother would be joining the lawsuit....and was hoping that at the very least she had gotten his permission to put him as a victim.