Off Topic Funny things non-gymnasts have said to you

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So, I know there was a thread about this a while ago, but it's a really old thread, and most of the people who posted on it aren't even here anymore, so I thought I'd start up a new one. I find it completely hilarious when people think they know what they're talking about but are horribly wrong (namely, my parents and friends). I'll start off with a few:
So, these are some snippets of a conversation my (non-gym) friend and I were having on the computer just yesterday:

Me: I'm watching the Olympics! Yay! Go USA!
Her: Oh yeah, I was watching part of the men's yesterday. But I have to ask, what is that white powder stuff they put on their hands?
M: LOL it's chalk!
H: But what for?
M: It absorbs sweat so they don't slip.
H: Oh...
(later)

H: So, do you ever dream about being in the Olympics?
M: Definitely, but I know it's not going to happen.
H: Oh come on, you've gotta BELIEVE!!!
M: No, I mean, it's pretty much impossible for me.
H: Why?
M: Well, if I competed, I would only be in level 5. But I don't even compete. Plus it's a ton of money.
H: Well, that's why you get sponsors!
M: LOL you don't get sponsors as a level 5! Plus then you can't compete in college.
H: Well, you should be done with college by the time you're 29, right?
M: Um... 29?
H: Yeah! The next next next NEXT Olympics! You should be ready by then!
M: Um... you can't really go to the Olympics when you're 29.
H: Oh. Why?
M: Well, it's just too hard by then, and your body just wears out (yes I know there are exceptions, but I didn't want to confuse her any more :D)
H: Oh. Well, how about when you're 25?
M: Most girls competing are 16-18.
H: Oh.
(even later)

H: So, what are you the best at? Vault? Rings? Jumping around and doing cartwheels?
M: Oh boy. You have a lot to learn. 1, girls don't do rings. 2, jumping and doing cartwheels is not an event. It's called floor.
H: Oh... sorry, I didn't know that.

And then there's the whole thing where every time I watch a big meet on TV I have to explain to my parents why that girl got an extra turn on the vault.

Oh yeah, and today I was watching the Olympics with my dad, and we watched McKayla do her Amanar, where she took a step forward.
Me: Yes!!!
Dad: That wasn't very good, was it? (he always has to ask me if it was good or not)
Me: What do you mean? That was awesome!
Dad: But she took a huge step forward!
Me: Dad, that was 0.3. That's about all they can take from her on that vault.
Dad: Oh.
Tim: Wow, she has a lot of power!
Dad: See? She had too much power!
Me: Dad, she's the best vaulter in the world. She needs to have power.
Dad: Oh. But she took that huge step forward!
Me: *facepalm*

My friends all seem to be convinced that I am going to win it all in 2016. I don't see why everyone thinks just because you're a gymnast you're automatically going to the O's. If someone says they play basketball, do you instantly ask them if they are going to the O's?

Post your own!
 
My friend is totally sold that I'm gonna win 2016 to. That's NEVER going to happen. Whenever she introduces me to other people, she always says...

"This is M, and she's a gymnast. She's going to win the Olympics in 2016."
SOme other one's are,
"When is your off season?" "Um, we don't have one!"
"Can you do flippy stuff?"
"Why do you wear that stuff on your hands only on the swingy things?" "Grips? (explains grips) and it's called bars.
*I do a back tuck* "WOW!!! YOUR TOTALLY GOING TO THE OLYMPICS, DUDE!"
"M, you could've DIED doing that!" "I know"
"M, I didn't watch a single thing you did today because I was to scared to see if you would die." "Oh, well, I only wiped out a couple of times, but I'm fine." "OMG OMG!"

"MOM, she's the best vaulter in the WORLD! (McKayla Moroney does vault) "That's it? She took a huge step at the end." "Mom, did you have your eyes open? Look how high she went!"

I've heard a lot more, I'll post more when they come to my mind:)
 
Yours reminded me of some more. Of course the classic, Can you do a flippy thing?
So, one time my friend was watching me practice. We were on the tumble track, and I was trying a front layout (I'd only done it a couple of times before). I totally failed and landed on my back. I went over to talk to her (it's right by the door, and she was standing in the doorway) and she told me that it was amazing! I was like, :confused: I landed on my back! She goes, well, it was still amazing!

My dad has been listening to Tim way too much. Now he thinks a tiny hop is a fatal mistake. I keep having to tell him, dad, it's only 0.1. See that girl? She just flew off the floor. A tiny step is not that bad.
 
If you're watching NBC, a tiny hop forward on a dismount is a 0.8 deduction for the Russians but an archy handstand on bars for an American is 0.01. Obviously.

My friends refer to chalk as "crack" because I wrote a poem all about doing bars and it sounded like I was writing about a drug addiction and I described the chalk as "white powder".

Sometimes I hate my friends. They also have running "jokes" about how every gymnast is probably actually 12 because they look so young. Wait til I show them Koko Tsurumi!
 
I was giving a report in school, and since we have a mini trampoline and a crash mat at my school, I did a demonstration for them. I did a double front full. They were all impressed. Now, I realize that that was both a mistake and an honor...I'm always asked to do "flippy stuff" in the hall way and in the lunch room, ect. I mean seriously, when I tell them I don't want to get hurt, they think I was lying about my skills. So, now, I just say that I have a bad back. (which, I do, though it only hurts if I'm not careful) So, I just say that now so it doesn't sound like I'm lying or anything.
 
Funny thing a fellow gymnast said to me while watching the Olympics: "Wow, she looks so much like Catalina Ponor."
Me: "That is Catalina Ponor."
Her: "She's still competing?!"

She had been watching some old Olympics videos on YouTube and was really impressed by Cata.
 
I did a gymnastics demo a week ago, and was told by a lady that I'm very bouncy. And awesome. And oh, see you in the 2016 Olympics!

Okey dokey...
 

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