Parents Gym dad conversation...made me giggle

DON'T LURK... Join The Discussion!

Members see FEWER ads

Amusibus

Proud Parent
We had a long day of volunteering at a home meet this past weekend. After 12 hours, another mom and I went home and our husbands came to do clean up etc. They were chatting, and trying to figure out if our daughters knew each other. The other dad said his daughter's in level two. My husband said oh I think mine's in level 3 or 4 or something...I actually have no idea (she's level two). The other dad laughed and said don't feel bad, I just found out yesterday that mine's in level two. Lol!!
 
My DH is completely lost with gymnastics. Last year he called a shooting star a chocolate starfish. He just claps when I clap and is happy they are happy. He couldn't sit through a practice if his life depended on it, and doesn't even care to know how much we pay.. Blissfully oblivious is what I call him.
 
I've done setup/teardown a number of times now, and haven't run into any dads that weren't fully aware of what their daughters were doing. I can't even imagine.
 
Some dads are clueless...
The first meet that the girls' dad went to was YMCA Nationals in Toledo the year OG was in Old L5 when she was almost 10. We were in the same session as one of the teams in our league. One of their L5 gymnasts, almost 14 at the time, is and always was rather well endowed, if you get my meaning. He saw HER and was confused. He thought his little girl had to compete against her. He didn't understand how they could be in the same group... We had to explain levels and each level is broken down into age groups, so while they compete the same routines for the same judges in the same session, they do not directly compete against each other.

He is getting better. I am slowly teaching him. Of course, last season, most of her meets, all Xcel Gold were in one age group and THAT girl was in Xcel Gold... so OG did directly compete against her... and the tears in his eyes when OG took 1st place AA were so sweet!
 
I have 2 girls in gymnastics and we have been going to competitions for 7 years. This year at my younger dd's first meet he turned to me and asked me what level dd was competing. he really should have known! LOL
 
I'm very glad that the gym moms here see their husbands' lack of knowledge as humorous and adorable. Seriously I am. But as a gym dad my feelings towards this sort of attitude are completely different. These men are missing out on the best part of their daughters' lives. It just makes me sad and even a little angry to see men so out of touch with their kids.

I had a gym dad say to me recently "if it doesn't have a ball and points then I don't really understand it." Nonsense! He chooses not to understand it. The sport really isn't that difficult. This same dad didn't even know what program his daughter was in, much less her level. I've known dads that have never been to a meet even years after their daughter got involved in the sport.

Our daughters need their fathers to be in touch with their lives, to understand and appreciate their interests, to get excited with them, to be there when they encounter their disappointments, to hug them and love them when they need it the most. These fathers need to step up and get more involved.

My daughter came home from practice all excited today because she finally landed a skill that she has been working on for over a year. I gave her a high five and said "that's awesome, great job! I'm proud of you." And she knows that I mean it because she knows that I understand what she has gone through to achieve this accomplishment. How crushing would it have been to her if the only comment I could offer up in her moment of triumph was "You did a what? What's that?"
 
Sometimes I try to understand the lack of interest, but I really don't get it. The same thing happens at soccer with my other DD, but in this case, it's the moms. Some are involved, but others just throw their hands up at the "ball sport" or the "feet thing" and use it as an excuse to stay out of it. But that's all it is - an excuse. It's your daughter (or son)! Absent some debilitating condition, I can't fathom how you wouldn't be interested in whatever interested them and want to engage with them on it. If my girls take up photography, I'll learn enough to converse with them and have fun with them. If they take up ballet, I'll do the same. Skydiving, quiz bowl, chess, cheer, crafts, fostering animals, I don't care what it is - if they have some passion or interest, I'll want to engage with them on it and encourage them in it. Why? Because they're my daughters, and they want me to engage with me in ways that interest them.

I really don't get how you can be so aloof to your child's passions. What could be more interesting?
 
I'm very glad that the gym moms here see their husbands' lack of knowledge as humorous and adorable. Seriously I am. But as a gym dad my feelings towards this sort of attitude are completely different. These men are missing out on the best part of their daughters' lives. It just makes me sad and even a little angry to see men so out of touch with their kids.

I had a gym dad say to me recently "if it doesn't have a ball and points then I don't really understand it." Nonsense! He chooses not to understand it. The sport really isn't that difficult. This same dad didn't even know what program his daughter was in, much less her level. I've known dads that have never been to a meet even years after their daughter got involved in the sport.

Our daughters need their fathers to be in touch with their lives, to understand and appreciate their interests, to get excited with them, to be there when they encounter their disappointments, to hug them and love them when they need it the most. These fathers need to step up and get more involved.

My daughter came home from practice all excited today because she finally landed a skill that she has been working on for over a year. I gave her a high five and said "that's awesome, great job! I'm proud of you." And she knows that I mean it because she knows that I understand what she has gone through to achieve this accomplishment. How crushing would it have been to her if the only comment I could offer up in her moment of triumph was "You did a what? What's that?"
In our entire league, there are a lot of involved dads... and they are like you - they know what it takes for their girls and get excited along with them.
With OG and YG's dad, his former lack of involvement had to do with the fact that when they started, he was a tow truck driver/ mechanic/ snow plow operator on call 24/7... didn't really allow going 2-3 hours away from home for meets.
AND, it was MY family (me and my sister and brother) that got them into gymnastics. Their parents weren't involved (mom often worked weekends too, but would sometimes try to come to the home meet). Now (for the last few years for Dad and the last year for mom), both parents are remarried. Dad hasn't missed a Y Nationals (2011, 2013, 2014)... and since his first regular meet last season, he hasn't missed a meet, except for the session of District Championships that he was supposed to be at when an engine fell on his wrist.

I think more dads should be involved too.
 
To be fair to my dh he is interested. He drives the gymnastics carpool when needed. Will go early to watch them practice. Can name a lot of the harder skills and knows what they look like even. We take turns taking them to their meets. He is more involved than a lot of dads. So I was completely baffled when he turned to me and asked me what level she was competing. I thought it was funny because he really should have known!
 
With OG and YG's dad, his former lack of involvement had to do with the fact that when they started, he was a tow truck driver/ mechanic/ snow plow operator on call 24/7... didn't really allow going 2-3 hours away from home for meets.
AND, it was MY family (me and my sister and brother) that got them into gymnastics. Their parents weren't involved (mom often worked weekends too, but would sometimes try to come to the home meet). Now (for the last few years for Dad and the last year for mom), both parents are remarried.
Gee I love your household! You should write a book, or have a blog :)
 
As a followup note, I also know gym dads that are involved in the sport. They know what level the kids are competing, they show up at meets, they do volunteer work around the gym, and they know a good score from a not-so-good one. I don't want to paint a totally bleak picture.

And I certainly understand when job keeps a parent away. Some jobs are like that, unfortunately. Someone has to make the money that pays the gym bills. But I will say that a lack of involvement doesn't necessarily mean a lack on interest. You can be interested but unable to get involved. I'm not talking about the dads that fall in to that category. I'm saddened by the ones that have the time and still don't care to get involved.
 
While most of our dads are unaware (including my DD's), we have a few men who really step up. We have one dad who has channeled his "jock days" into his DD's sport and uses his natural talents to create a connection with her. His gift? Incredible memory for numbers. He can tell you every score his daughter had ever received at which meet and her placement. He can also tell you placement of her biggest "competitors" in the state when we compete directly against them. He knows what the team score was, what place, and whether we finished ahead of or behind gyms in our state.

He'll start reminiscing and say "Remember that time when Susie got a 9.5 but it was only good for 4th place at the Gymnastics Super Spectacular Meet?" And I just stand there, mouth agape, thinking, "No Bob. No I don't." LOL Somedays I'm just happy that I remember how to add!

He was also a high school athlete and can tell you all the stats of all four years he played for himself and his teammates. I've never seen anything like it.
 
@wnl256 - My husband falls mostly into your last category: my husband is very interested, but to this day has not been able to come to a meet. DD is very nervous, and so far only my mom and I can come without giving her angst. We have some friends who say that he should just go, and disregard her wishes. With only 6 meets a year, he does not want to be the reason she falls off the beam! He's cool with it. He's VERY proud of her. And this year she's letting me video, and we learned how to plug it into the tv, and now he gets to see her routines. Especially the bar routine when she hit her horizontal casts and came in 1st place. When we have long / late meets, he will make sure to have a special dinner at home waiting ;)

I texted him internationally during her last meet and he replied that he was tearing up and so very proud.
It works for us, and everyone is happy.
 
I'm very glad that the gym moms here see their husbands' lack of knowledge as humorous and adorable. Seriously I am. But as a gym dad my feelings towards this sort of attitude are completely different. These men are missing out on the best part of their daughters' lives. It just makes me sad and even a little angry to see men so out of touch with their kids.

I had a gym dad say to me recently "if it doesn't have a ball and points then I don't really understand it." Nonsense! He chooses not to understand it. The sport really isn't that difficult. This same dad didn't even know what program his daughter was in, much less her level. I've known dads that have never been to a meet even years after their daughter got involved in the sport.

Our daughters need their fathers to be in touch with their lives, to understand and appreciate their interests, to get excited with them, to be there when they encounter their disappointments, to hug them and love them when they need it the most. These fathers need to step up and get more involved.

My daughter came home from practice all excited today because she finally landed a skill that she has been working on for over a year. I gave her a high five and said "that's awesome, great job! I'm proud of you." And she knows that I mean it because she knows that I understand what she has gone through to achieve this accomplishment. How crushing would it have been to her if the only comment I could offer up in her moment of triumph was "You did a what? What's that?"

My DH stays out of it because as a former national champion wrestler and college recruited football player (he was injured his senior and had to stop playing football) he knows if he gets involved he will be the worst CGD ever. He goes to meets and knows when to cheer and what level and skills she is working but stays out on purpose.
 
My dh and I are both interested....but not too involved. Does that make sense? I mean, we are involved n that we do booster club, we attend meets, and we help at the gym when needed. We take an interest in his meets, his skills, etc. But he will come home and say " mom, dad, I got my xyz." now that he is optional.....we have no idea what that means. We are still super excited for him, and we have him show us his skill (usually someone has videoed it for him.) or we google it. LOL.
 

New Posts

DON'T LURK... Join The Discussion!

Members see FEWER ads

Gymnaverse :: Recent Activity

College Gym News

New Posts

Back