Based on the little info above, I would say your DD has not got many skills for her age and time in gym. Equally many parents don't know the names of skills, so it is possible you left out a bunch of impressive skills she can do. I would say comparative to the kids within my gym's rec program of a similar age and level that your DD takes a longer time to develop her skills than average. This is not a bad thing, but this would help to explain why the coach was blunt and somewhat callous in her response when you mentioned competitions. I would suggest investigating some other gyms that may have a program better suited to your DD (one with a nicer coach perhaps) and who may offer a competitive path for all kids who put in the effort and have the desire.
Parents Gymnastics Body Type?
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Based on the little info above, I would say your DD has not got many skills for her age and time in gym. Equally many parents don't know the names of skills, so it is possible you left out a bunch of impressive skills she can do. I would say comparative to the kids within my gym's rec program of a similar age and level that your DD takes a longer time to develop her skills than average. This is not a bad thing, but this would help to explain why the coach was blunt and somewhat callous in her response when you mentioned competitions. I would suggest investigating some other gyms that may have a program better suited to your DD (one with a nicer coach perhaps) and who may offer a competitive path for all kids who put in the effort and have the desire.
Sasha
Proud Parent
All good advice so far.
Your daughter is not too old, nor too 'long', to have a successful competitive team experience, even in J.O. It is just a matter of finding the right gym and coach that fits where she is skill-wise and goal-wise.
I would first meet with the "Head Coach" at your current gym (the person who makes the team-invite decisions) and politely ask if and how your daughter would be considered for team. Ask for honesty, and that you promise he/she will not hurt your feelings if the answer is no.
Depending on that outcome, start scoping and scheduling try-outs at other gyms. Hopefully you have several choices, though not everyone has tons of choices near them. If limited, I would still take her to gyms that are potentially 'too far' just to get the feedback of whether or not she would be accepted in their program.
Likely, she will be happily invited to team/pre-team somewhere. If not, and you are getting a consistent message that she is not ready for team and some insight as to why, at least you will have a better, more realistic picture of her outlook. You can consider Xcel, or more Rec, or Cheer, or T&T, or whatever else she might love.
The "too long" comment was irritatingly insensitive (could be the "young" factor of the coach not realizing that). There are plenty of "long" gymnasts(!!). BUT helpful in the sense that it's better to hear something honest than be strung along as others have said.
Your daughter is not too old, nor too 'long', to have a successful competitive team experience, even in J.O. It is just a matter of finding the right gym and coach that fits where she is skill-wise and goal-wise.
I would first meet with the "Head Coach" at your current gym (the person who makes the team-invite decisions) and politely ask if and how your daughter would be considered for team. Ask for honesty, and that you promise he/she will not hurt your feelings if the answer is no.
Depending on that outcome, start scoping and scheduling try-outs at other gyms. Hopefully you have several choices, though not everyone has tons of choices near them. If limited, I would still take her to gyms that are potentially 'too far' just to get the feedback of whether or not she would be accepted in their program.
Likely, she will be happily invited to team/pre-team somewhere. If not, and you are getting a consistent message that she is not ready for team and some insight as to why, at least you will have a better, more realistic picture of her outlook. You can consider Xcel, or more Rec, or Cheer, or T&T, or whatever else she might love.
The "too long" comment was irritatingly insensitive (could be the "young" factor of the coach not realizing that). There are plenty of "long" gymnasts(!!). BUT helpful in the sense that it's better to hear something honest than be strung along as others have said.
GymDad9.9
Proud Parent
Sounds like this coach is a dream killer. Don't let her be the final opinion.
Just my 2 cents. My oldest DD tried out for team at our gym at 10. The HC thought she was too old and too tall for JO. She only had a pullover, handstand, one side split, and backhand spring ( froggy). So she did 3 years of Excel (bronze, silver, and gold). And absolutely killed it! 95% of the time, she was top 3 on podium, and state champ pretty much every year. But, she was often told she was "so big" etc. She was never big, just average. Gymnastics is skewed towards the tiny. Eventually, DD quit....she was tired of being told she was a giant. Now she is 14, playing a field sport, still killing it at her huge size of 5'2" and 107 pounds! She is pretty much done growing. Try multiple gyms. My DD misses it. I wish I had shopped around for her, but unfortunately, my other 2 love it there. Size at 10 doesn't predict anything. Good luck!
Sasha
Proud Parent
I should add, on the age thing (and there are many other similar stories told here), that I have personally seen girls start Rec at age 10-11, and L3 team at 12, continue on to be among the best in the group in optionals. Not going to the Olympics or probably Div1, but can sure do some great gymnastics!
StringBean'sMom
Proud Parent
As you can see from my screen name, I have one of those long, leggy gymnasts that you might expect to be "awkward" however, she is anything but awkward when she competes! Long legs can make some beautiful lines!!
Body type doesn't have to dictate what she's capable of if she really loves it. My girl didn't start competing until she was 10 at L3 and I'm sure many gyms would have considered her definitely too old and too tall at that point. She just completed a season at L6 at 12 yr old and is likely moving to L7 next season. I agree with everyone else - if she wants to do it, find the gym or the coach that is willing to let her try!
Body type doesn't have to dictate what she's capable of if she really loves it. My girl didn't start competing until she was 10 at L3 and I'm sure many gyms would have considered her definitely too old and too tall at that point. She just completed a season at L6 at 12 yr old and is likely moving to L7 next season. I agree with everyone else - if she wants to do it, find the gym or the coach that is willing to let her try!
The gym my daughter attends has every body type imaginable. Take your girl somewhere they appreciate passion.
Go to another gym. No WAY that she can't compete Xcel Bronze. It seems odd that the coach steered the conversation in that direction just to tell you "don't even think about her competing" when you never even brought it up in the first place. That is weird. Get an eval for an Xcel team at another gym if she loves it.
Take her somewhere else. Body type shouldn't deter kids from doing gymnastics.
My dd on the other hand is told the opposite. Mind you, she scored really well at state, and while she's in podium, coach is telling me that I need to change her diet! She's 8, 60 lbs and pure muscle! Her doctor never said anything g about her weight! Ugh... I am so almost over it with this gym as well!
My dd on the other hand is told the opposite. Mind you, she scored really well at state, and while she's in podium, coach is telling me that I need to change her diet! She's 8, 60 lbs and pure muscle! Her doctor never said anything g about her weight! Ugh... I am so almost over it with this gym as well!
MILgymFAM
Proud Parent
My younger one was told the same thing and was pushed out of artistic before she even made it to a team. Now she's on a t&t team, and while it's been better than artistic, her body type still comes up. Just the other day another mom at the gym asked me if I thought my YDDs body type caused her scores to be lower than other kids. I simply said I sure hope not and moved on, but I guess the mentality is floating around.
Selecting by body type alone is a privilege some coaches have had. I have personally worked with a coach who has a tremendous amount of knowledge and experience, but who has been privileged to be able to work with the creme de la creme. My gym is in a limited talent/gene/geographical pool. 
. I don't have the luxury of turning kids away simply because they don't fit the "mold" of ideal competitive gymnasts, and luckily my gym is really inclusive. We had one L10 a few years back that I became close with and I told her several times what a wonderful role model she was to the younger ones because she didn't have that stereotypical gymmie look and she did just fine.
If body type alone was a determining factor, my own DD would certainly not be in gymnastics. In regular life she is by no means big but she is slightly more compact than most of her teammates, definitely more Shawn than Nastia..!
Now... I would think about what the coach is telling (and not telling) you. It sounds as if this particular coach has made up his/her mind that your DD doesn't necessarily have what it takes to cut it at your gym, for whatever reason.if her body type is being used as an excuse, look around and see if you can find a more inclusive gym or take a look at the team gymnasts at your own gym. If there are all different types, then obviously they made it "through" this coach, right ? If they all fit the same mold and your DD does not, well there's your answer, no future at this gym... If there are various types on team, consider what the coach might be telling you. Could (s)he be taking the easy way out and "blaming" your Dds body type rather than tell you plainly she doesn't have what it takes? I obviously don't know your gymmie at all, I'm just brainstorming and trying to figure it out. Find out the path to team and go further, take her to the next team evaluation or whatever. Speak to the team coaches if you can.
As a coach I'm not into mind games and I will straight up tell parents if I feel their child would not have a future in. Competitive gymnastics. I have had to have that conversation, only a couple of times, but it's never easy.
. I don't have the luxury of turning kids away simply because they don't fit the "mold" of ideal competitive gymnasts, and luckily my gym is really inclusive. We had one L10 a few years back that I became close with and I told her several times what a wonderful role model she was to the younger ones because she didn't have that stereotypical gymmie look and she did just fine. If body type alone was a determining factor, my own DD would certainly not be in gymnastics. In regular life she is by no means big but she is slightly more compact than most of her teammates, definitely more Shawn than Nastia..!
Now... I would think about what the coach is telling (and not telling) you. It sounds as if this particular coach has made up his/her mind that your DD doesn't necessarily have what it takes to cut it at your gym, for whatever reason.if her body type is being used as an excuse, look around and see if you can find a more inclusive gym or take a look at the team gymnasts at your own gym. If there are all different types, then obviously they made it "through" this coach, right ? If they all fit the same mold and your DD does not, well there's your answer, no future at this gym...
If there are various types on team, consider what the coach might be telling you. Could (s)he be taking the easy way out and "blaming" your Dds body type rather than tell you plainly she doesn't have what it takes? I obviously don't know your gymmie at all, I'm just brainstorming and trying to figure it out. Find out the path to team and go further, take her to the next team evaluation or whatever. Speak to the team coaches if you can. As a coach I'm not into mind games and I will straight up tell parents if I feel their child would not have a future in. Competitive gymnastics. I have had to have that conversation, only a couple of times, but it's never easy.
dynamicduo
Proud Parent
There is a girl on my dds team who didn't step foot into a gym until she was 13! She is 20 now and is headed to level 9 Westerns this week then is going level 10. She is taking classes at a jr college until she finishes one season of 10, which has been her dream! So, you are never too old to start!
ProudDad
Proud Parent
It really stinks that you and dd are in this situation, but there has already been a lot of good advice about how to help dd find a better fit so she can follow her dreams.
While your posts don't show any reason for concern... I have seen the most collected people go nuclear when someone trips the 'momma bear' switch. If you do go to other gyms be very careful of what and how you say things - including to other parents. Gymnastics is a small world kind of thing and most coaches know and talk to each other throughout a state, if not region. Many gymnasts and coaches move around for all sorts of reasons and you never know who's best friend you might be taking to.
While your posts don't show any reason for concern... I have seen the most collected people go nuclear when someone trips the 'momma bear' switch. If you do go to other gyms be very careful of what and how you say things - including to other parents. Gymnastics is a small world kind of thing and most coaches know and talk to each other throughout a state, if not region. Many gymnasts and coaches move around for all sorts of reasons and you never know who's best friend you might be taking to.
lovemygymnast
Proud Parent
In my opinion, you should take her to at least try another gym. It may be true or may be that this coach doesn't see her potential. I just truly believe that if gymnastics is something she loves, then as your parent, you should encourage her. I disagree about a certain body type though. In our compulsory levels, there are several girls you wouldn't think would have a "perfect gymnast body type" but they bust out some high scores!! It's about fun, exercise, making relationships and so much more!! Gymnastics is an awesome sport & I would hate for one coach to decide your dd's future in it before she ever gets started!!!
D
Deleted member 14190
Well hold on, we don't know exactly what is going on, and the coach may be being very honest with the OP. Isn't that what everyone wants? Not having the body type could be a multitude of things and a very polite way of saying "she just doesn't have it". Who knows. I wouldn't fault the coach in any way for doing this, sounds honest to me (doesn't mean they are correct, but at least being honest and not stringing them along) . That being said, XCEL is absolutely for all kids. If this gym does not offer XCEL then of course you can explore your options, or she can stay and work super hard take some privates and make the team!
Also keep this in mind, As a teenager I was told that I was too old and would not make team. It set a fire under me and a year later I was on that team (same gym) and made it to Class 1 (level 10 in the old days). Nothing is written in stone in gymnastics, NOTHING. Hope that helps.
Also keep this in mind, As a teenager I was told that I was too old and would not make team. It set a fire under me and a year later I was on that team (same gym) and made it to Class 1 (level 10 in the old days). Nothing is written in stone in gymnastics, NOTHING.
Hope that helps.I'm a big believer in trying to see all the information offered (especially when I don't like the information I've heard). I think this coach did you a huge favor, and gave you what you needed to move forward.
While I understand not liking what the coach told you, I also think there is much to be appreciated in what she said. You've discovered several things:
1. This coach doesn't think your child is cut out for competitive gymnastics. Doesn't really matter the reason, coach doesn't think she has it. You can dislike the message and still appreciate the coach was straight up with you and did it without your child being present.
2. You now can try to find out if it is a single coach at the gym your daughter is at, or if this is the belief of all the coaches at that gym. This information helps you to find out if this gym is right for your daughter's goals. This is again good info to have right now. If they don't think she has it - you can find a different gym who believes she does.
3. You can call other gyms and see if there is a different gym that will help your daughter meet her goals to compete.
This coach has given you information that is going to help you move your daughter's goals forward (finding another coach, or finding another gym, or finding another goal - it will depend on what else happens now).
I used to believe that "inclusive" gyms were always the best gyms. However, after watching the politics at many different gyms, I have to say that I now believe gyms that clearly state their criteria for the different programs they offer are often better run gyms. It might sting to hear from a coach or gym owner that your child has no chance to compete for them because your child is already 7 years old and just starting gymnastics, but you also don't waste your time or money taking rec classes at that gym hoping your child might get asked to join team eventually.
I still believe there is a gym for every gymnast. But you need to find the gym that is the best for your child, not necessarily the "best" gym.
While I understand not liking what the coach told you, I also think there is much to be appreciated in what she said. You've discovered several things:
1. This coach doesn't think your child is cut out for competitive gymnastics. Doesn't really matter the reason, coach doesn't think she has it. You can dislike the message and still appreciate the coach was straight up with you and did it without your child being present.
2. You now can try to find out if it is a single coach at the gym your daughter is at, or if this is the belief of all the coaches at that gym. This information helps you to find out if this gym is right for your daughter's goals. This is again good info to have right now. If they don't think she has it - you can find a different gym who believes she does.
3. You can call other gyms and see if there is a different gym that will help your daughter meet her goals to compete.
This coach has given you information that is going to help you move your daughter's goals forward (finding another coach, or finding another gym, or finding another goal - it will depend on what else happens now).
I used to believe that "inclusive" gyms were always the best gyms. However, after watching the politics at many different gyms, I have to say that I now believe gyms that clearly state their criteria for the different programs they offer are often better run gyms. It might sting to hear from a coach or gym owner that your child has no chance to compete for them because your child is already 7 years old and just starting gymnastics, but you also don't waste your time or money taking rec classes at that gym hoping your child might get asked to join team eventually.
I still believe there is a gym for every gymnast. But you need to find the gym that is the best for your child, not necessarily the "best" gym.
Midwestmommy
Proud Parent
I agree. However it can be pretty demoralizing for a kid or parent to feel the kid has a coach/teacher that instead of supporting her goals to compete some day, now may be more invested in seeing her fail to prove they were right. If you get positive answers from actual team coach or owner etc and choose to stay at the current gym, try to switch her into a class with a different coach. Don't linger too long though before you check on other programs that might be a better fit.
This is kind of true, in that (almost) any body type can do gymnastics. There are, however, certain body types that will make gymnastics extremely difficult and make the athlete progress slowly. I would never rule a child out based on their height, as it is not really an indicator as how far they will go, especially at such a young age. I would also not rule out a child based on being too heavy, as I've seen lots of heavy gymnasts be very successful.
I will tell you, completely and honestly, that in my opinion, the kids that have the hardest time with this sport are those that are heavier and not at all strong. Strong kids can carry a little extra weight and do just fine, but if their upper body is naturally weak and they have large frame to support, bars is going to be just so extremely hard, even at the lower levels, it's sure to result in frustration.
That being said, I have a kid that was very good at tumbling and vaulting but had never done bars before. She was a little chubby (not obese by any means) and I thought her bars would come very slowly. She was not super weak, but did struggle with strength. I told her mom she could compete Level 2 this year but bars would be the key event. She worked hard and got all of her skills and I'm so proud.
On the other hand, I have an athlete who has to work so hard on her strength and, in addition, carries a bit of extra wait. She misses practice quite a bit and it seems that no matter how much conditioning we do, she struggles to be strong enough to really progress on bars. I wouldn't let that preclude any child from doing gymnastics, but if it were my child, I would like this kind of candidness just so I could pursue other sports where their body type might be more beneficial.
My daughter is 11 and went through a huge growth spurt last year. She's 5'2 now and towers above her teammates. She's also gained some weight. She looks like a typical kid, but doesn't scream gymnast anymore. Anyway, her scores have been lower this year. It could also be that because of the rapid grown and pain associated with that, her training has been interrupted, but part of it, I think, is that being tiny just makes it look more effortless. I'm sure she will adjust, but I've had the same thoughts!
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