WAG How to know when a gymnast needs to be pushed?

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gymisforeveryone

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I have had several of my teenage gymnasts tell me on different occasions that they would want to be pushed harder. They feel like they got results quicker when they had a coach who pushed them HARD. She was pretty extreme sometimes and even used methods like making a crying gymnast stand on the beam until she made the X skill. Also, the gymnasts had to sometimes stay very late at practice when everyone else left to finish conditioning if they didn't make X skill.

On the other hand, some of these gymnasts who were coached by this coach tell me that they are still trying to handle some of the stress, anxiety and trauma that those methods caused. That coach was very demanding and wanted results - and yes most of the girls did pretty well at competitions.

I hate forcing, yelling, humiliating and frighting the gymnasts. I want them to find their inner motivation to do the X skill. I cheer and encourage but I rarely push them over their limits. I get where they are coming from - they are teens and getting scared of everything especially on the beam and would want some external pressure to get up on the high beam and just throw the skill when forced.

But I struggle to know when to push that hard. They are teens, so they can one day tell me that they need to be pushed more and then the other day look at me murderously when I say that today is the day that they are not allowed to use that mat on the beam anymore. I struggle to know when they are actually receptive to external pressure and when they are not. Again, they are teens so they easily blame tiredness, soreness or aches when they are not making progress with X skill. Sometimes it's definitely real and I need to back off but sometimes it's just an excuse because they are scared. I struggle to know the difference.

Please help me wrap my head around this! How to push them harder using only methods that are not abusive or harmful for their mental health? I want them to reach their full potential and if they want to be pushed I'm going to do that, but I would want to have some guidance on how to do that in a healthy and positive way.
 
Making kids stand on beam crying until they get a Skill is not pushing them, it’s pointlessly doing the opposite. The kid is standing there getting worked up about the skill, then every time they are asked to do the skill they will remember how worked up they got and it will be harder, not easier. Sure they might do it that day, but we are looking for long term results.

To get the best out of teens.

1. Build their confidence. If they believe in themselves and think they can do the skills they will. Make sure you praise and help them see all the things they are doing well, as many teens only focus on what they are doing wrong. Build up drills and steps where they can feel themselves achieving the movement before they go into the skill.

2. Mix it up. Teens are wired to look for novelty and stimulation. That’s one reason why their conversation might feel more important to them than doing the drills. Keep training changing, fun, new drills, invovative.

3. Recognise that teens are very social creatures and their need to socialise and interact is very strong and use it. Work in pairs and teams, have goals they achieve as a group. Maybe instead of achieving 5 routines themselves, a group of 3 achieves 15 etc. if used the right way their need to socialise can further their training.

4. Ask them regularly what their goals are. What new skills do they want to learn, what do they want to achieve with their gymnastics. If your goals and their goals don’t fall in line, you won’t get much motivation.

5. Communicate. Sometimes laziness is avoiding a skill because they are scared or they feel like they can’t do it.
 
I'll usually tell them they have to try it. I don't care if it's pretty, if 2 coaches are spotting them, if nobody should be watching them, if we should just lift them through the motion. As long as they try, I'm OK with them.

I had one girl who was really scared of front handsprings. In the early stages, she was scared of handstand bridges. I did so much 'handstand and fall over until you land on your feet' until she one day decided that she could do it. Her front handspring is not beautiful, but she is doing it. Just by pushing her a little more each week
 
I think @Aussie_coach has some great ideas. I have a suggestion and that is to listen to what they have asked for and give it to them, but only in a small dose. Sit with them and discuss how to push them and then give them one or two days a week when practice will be more focuses and intense to meet their requirements. The other days focus on your style with some @Aussie_coach thrown in. It will keep them invested to have their practices changing regularly.
 
As a gymnast I always wanted to be pushed. I never experienced anything like their prior coach did, and didn't want something that extreme. I wanted to be told what skills I needed to be working on, where my coach expected me to be. I wanted to know specifics of what needed to be fixed or changed during a skill. I wanted to be practicing, whether through drills or with mats, higher stills. I must admit that I am a perfectionist and I wanted my skills to be perfect. When I wanted to be push I just didn't want a coach that was ok with where I currently was. This may be just me, but it might help you understand the gymnast point of view.
 
As a gymnast I always wanted to be pushed. I never experienced anything like their prior coach did, and didn't want something that extreme. I wanted to be told what skills I needed to be working on, where my coach expected me to be. I wanted to know specifics of what needed to be fixed or changed during a skill. I wanted to be practicing, whether through drills or with mats, higher stills. I must admit that I am a perfectionist and I wanted my skills to be perfect. When I wanted to be push I just didn't want a coach that was ok with where I currently was. This may be just me, but it might help you understand the gymnast point of view.
YG likes to be pushed ... but not too hard. She wants corrections and suggestions for how to fix things she is working on. When HC is busy with the High School team or another group, she is often coached by a "rah - rah" coach ... one that is good at being happy for the gymnasts and, if they don't "get" the skill, it is "nice try" or "you'll get it next time."
YG doesn't do well if she isn't being given constructive feedback. BUT if she feels like she is being barked at or the coach isn't giving helpful feedback, then she will shut down.
Like you, she is a perfectionist ... but an easily frustrated one, lol.
 
I'm glad you asked this. I work in a gym where yelling is pretty normal, I am very quiet and not at all a yeller. It's been an interesting dynamic coming into the gym as I am so different from other coaches and some of the kids have not necessarily appreciated the different style. I've even had kids say things along the lines of, "Just yell at me and I'll do it" when it comes to a fear issue. In my observation I think I've found that there are some types of kids who, after several years of being yelled at, really only perform when they are being yelled at or threatened with punishment. The internal pattern they've developed is that they can only perform so long as they are being yelled at- so why exert the effort otherwise?
And I think some earlier posters have confused not pushing with lax or easy coaching- they aren't the same at all. I have high expectations for the kids (and I know from her posts that gymisforeveryone does as well), we have structure in practices, I offer lots of corrections in addition to praise, they condition hard and I hold them to a high standard, but I don't scream or threaten with rope climbs or make them stand on the beam in tears until they go for a skill. If there is an issue I talk to them firmly about respect, attitude, work ethic, sportsmanship, etc. And I try hard not to call out a kid in front of her peers (unless the issue is causing disruption among the whole group). That's not to say I don't screw up frequently, but I try really hard to show the behavior won't be tolerated without creating a sense of shame or that the child is inherently bad for not meeting expectations.
But I think some kids do develop this idea that they need to be yelled at or belittled to progress and I firmly believe that is not a positive thing for a kid to believe. I think there are ways to encourage a child to be brave, conquer fears, and be a little better than they were the day before in a demanding yet positive way but that is a HUGE change for kids who have been brought up with a coaching style that is more based on yelling to get the job done.
So my advice is to keep doing what you're doing! Encourage goal setting among the athletes so they start to develop more internal motivation, be firm and consistent with clear expectations, encourage them to be a little better each day and highlight the progress. At least that's what I'm doing and really hoping that I can help mold some new patterns.
 
Thanks for all the replies! I've been busy at camps and having 17 gymnast-parent-coach meetings around the already crazy schedule!

I have never once thought about starting to yell my gymnasts, sorry if I gave that kind of impression. I have coached my gymnasts in a way that they are not so used to - I have let them have a lot of influence on how they practice, what skills they do, what beam they choose etc. Maybe I have given them too much of freedom and that has made them confused. I have high standards but maybe not as high as their previous coach. It took me time to get to know these girls and in the process I was pretty cautious to give strict orders, absolute rulings or anything like that - I wanted to first make sure that I knew the girls and their history with the conditioning, skills and progressions. I also had had a hard earlier experience with a group of teenagers that I took over at pretty much same age as my girls are now and it didn't end up well because I was too demanding and gave them no say on most of the things. Now that I have watched my own behavior from the from afar and made some observations of myself I have realized that I have been scared to do the same mistakes with this group and I have given them too much freedom to make decisions on their own training. It seems to be hard to find a happy medium.

Now we have had conversations with all of the girls and I have listened to every one of them. They have given same great insight that has helped me tremendously. Now we are making some changes and watching if they help.
 
Thanks for all the replies! I've been busy at camps and having 17 gymnast-parent-coach meetings around the already crazy schedule!

I have never once thought about starting to yell my gymnasts, sorry if I gave that kind of impression. I have coached my gymnasts in a way that they are not so used to - I have let them have a lot of influence on how they practice, what skills they do, what beam they choose etc. Maybe I have given them too much of freedom and that has made them confused. I have high standards but maybe not as high as their previous coach. It took me time to get to know these girls and in the process I was pretty cautious to give strict orders, absolute rulings or anything like that - I wanted to first make sure that I knew the girls and their history with the conditioning, skills and progressions. I also had had a hard earlier experience with a group of teenagers that I took over at pretty much same age as my girls are now and it didn't end up well because I was too demanding and gave them no say on most of the things. Now that I have watched my own behavior from the from afar and made some observations of myself I have realized that I have been scared to do the same mistakes with this group and I have given them too much freedom to make decisions on their own training. It seems to be hard to find a happy medium.

Now we have had conversations with all of the girls and I have listened to every one of them. They have given same great insight that has helped me tremendously. Now we are making some changes and watching if they help.


OMG, where are you??? I’m DD complains that her coaches aren’t engaged and could care less about her progress. Sometimes they don’t even watch her. It so completely frustrating!
 

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