Parents In between levels- where to place?

[Lilou]

That's what I'm thinking too unfortunately.... :-/

There must be some sort of fundamental, behind the scenes issue at your current gym to have that much coaching turnover...that is NOT normal!

 

[Lilou]

Great things to think about... What I'm thinking is that some of the kids in Level 2 are learning basics and form and they move them up to L3, those are usually the 8 year olds. Anyone younger than that, they seem to keep in L2 to keep working on the L2 skills and form, but I'm not convinced their spending attention on all kids on proper form and drills, especially the 5 and 6 year olds (the category my child fell in to last year). Now that my daugher is 7, she'll get more attention to then move in to L3 at 8. in their eyes from what I'm thinking. This is not to say my daughter's form is bad and she didn't learn anything. But it's not perfect either. However it was good enough to earn 9s at meets and stand on the podium. The high rate of coach turnover hasn't helped develop a rhythm for the kids either or the coaches ability to see how the kids are progressing. The L3/4 coaches expect the girls to have the L3 skills already and good form. I do believe my daughter needs more work on form but I also know she can do all of the L3 skills so I'm wondering why the coaches can't move her and work on the skills and form in L3 at the same the time. They did say they want her to be more consistent with the moves. She does follow corrections (from what the coach said) and there are no fear or blocks (opposite actually that I have to tell her she's now allowed to do more than she knows how to do.) The real problem is that because of all of the coaching changes, the L2 class is way too basic and easy now. Too basic for a few girls in the class.
The other gym said they'd put her on their L3 team. I don't mind if she repeats L3 a second year... in fact, I asked our current gym to have her train level 3 for a year and not compete and then repeat the following year. Or even uptrain L3 while competing L2. But the gap now with the new coaches, is HUGE between L2 and L3. It used to be closer to help get the kids ready for the next level. Now, it's really back to the basics and even further basic than what's appropriate for my daughter. I guess I would hope that the new gym doesn't say they'll put her in L3 and then change their mind. She seemed to me (but I don't know much) that she was in the middle of the pack for L3. At our current gym, my daughter has developed a rapport with the L3 coach at our gym when she has the opportunity to work with her. Honestly, this is another reason I want her in L3 , at our current gym, so she can work with the coach she loves and have some stability. But we're not getting that.

I do believe I would have to take her out of our current gym eventually since they have very few optional girls and I think she could have better coaching elsewhere, assuming she makes it to optionals down the road. So, it may be we just cut out earlier than I had originally planned.
Thank you for bringing up other sides to this, it's such a tough thing to know what's right for her. I'll use what you wrote to ask the coaches at the other gym some questions too. I do know though she's bored and not learning anything new (in form too) where she currently is. I've tried to work with the coaches to have that change for her so we can stay, but I see nothing changing yet. And we're hitting up against August now and teams are getting finalized so I have to make a decision.

So the thing that sticks out to me throughout this conversation is that you say the L3 and L4 coaches/gymnasts are good at this (current) gym. What I cannot figure out is how they GET a good L3 team if they aren't adequately coaching them in L2. Are the L3/4 coaches picking kids just based on potential from the L2 team? If the L2's aren't being trained properly with an eye on higher level progressions and skills, where is the training coming in? HOW are the L3's getting good, only after moving up? We don't do L2 at all but instead have a preteam/developmental group. It is the job of those coaches to make the basics, form, strength and skill progressions good enough for L3.
Playing devils advocate for a moment (bear with me)... is it possible there is something, anything, else that could be the culprit? Is your DD focused and working hard during practice? Does she actively try to use corrections etc? Has she been dealing with fears or blocks that may make them think it would be in her best interest to take things slower?
It is positive that another gym would put her on their L3 team, it shows she at least has the potential to get there. However, I would truly think about if there are any other circumstances that could come into play that your "mom goggles" may be missing...
If there isn't anything at all, I would seriously consider moving gyms. I would go over everything with a fine tooth comb before though because you keep saying the other coaches are great and I would hate for a kid to miss out on what would be a great gym for her simply because a parent feels she is inappropriately placed in levels...
Do realize that I am speaking from a coaches standpoint here. I have seen girls leave our program for that very reason, go to our main competition because they were promised the level they wanted (which they were not getting at our gym, for various reasons) and those gymnasts (without a single exception!!) have ended up either repeating that level (thus ending up in the same exact spot they would have been with us a year later) or failing altogether. Not saying that is the only outcome, obviously there are many success stories, but that has been my personal experience with our gym over the past 5yrs being involved with team. Generally, if we are holding a kid back, there is a really good reason and it has proven to be correct with every single one of the kids who moved.
The opposite could happen, if the coaches at her current gym aren't as good as you believe and they are for whatever reason "skipping over" her and not seeing her true potential, then absolutely you need to move gyms and go where her coaches will be more invested in her.
A larger gym may have less "invested" in each kid and allow more kids on their team to begin with, with the idea of coaching to the top and letting the bottoms repeat.
I know this post is all over the place, I am just trying to allow you to really take an objective look at it. It is really easy as a parent to just jump on to the "well if she isn't moved up here you need to change gyms!" bandwagon, nobody really wants to say that hey, maybe there IS a reason she is being held back. Us coaches do not WANT to hold a kid back. What we DO want (most of us anyways!) is to place a kid where she is going to have personal success and fit in, so that she enjoys gymnastics and keep progressing at a steady rate without being too overwhelmed or frustrated. Maybe for your kid, that is L3, maybe it isn't at this point.
Best of luck, it is such a hard thing to make these decisions for our kids sometimes!!

 

[Lilou]

Level 3 is our largest team at our gym. It seems competitive for our gym because there is a big jump from L2 to L3. Then same coaches for L4. Most kids score out of L5 and then optionals. So it seems that to get into our L3 is pretty competitive. I did ask to have her train with L3 and either start competing in January or hold off entirely, but they are very structured and no one typically moves after August. No level changes during the year at all.
Thanks for your thoughts... feels fruitless too to stay there, unless I'm missing something. That's why it takes me a while to act, I try to see all sides of the coin and I think I've pretty much done that now.

Argh, that must be so frustrating! To know that if only she was in the next level this could be the right gym for her...
Instead it looks like a possibly fruitless year ahead...
I know you said level three is quite competitive where you are- is that to get into the group at your gym or to compete in your area? Would the coaches, and your DD, possibly consider her training with the level threes but holding off competing until the coaches think she is ready?
Feeling for both you and your DD...

 

[amiandjim]

I think you already know the answer...you need to move her now. Yes, she might protest and it will be rough for a bit. In the long run, she will thank you. When I moved DD7 last year, I just said "we are changing gyms." She was hesitant for a week, and from then on has been all in!! She absolutely loves her gym now!!

 

[John]

DD 10 moved I said we are moving. You can try a couple and we will decide. She decided after visiting my preferred choice. When she has good coaches she trusts and coaches that beleive is her she will do as they ask. When they ask for a form correction she will want to I prove herself and make her coaches proud. This happened for my DD. Try a new gym quietly and if the decision to leave is made do it openly and honestly.

 

[NY Dad]

I know it's a little late for new opinions but...

My dd switched gyms this summer. So far it‘s been great for her. Our situation was pretty different than yours. My dd’s previous coach basically told me that he gave up on her (not in those words). Therefore I didn't feel like she had anything to lose by switching gyms. It sounds like your situation is different and that if you are able to get your dd to level 3 (or to train with level 3) she/you could be very happy.

Please take my idea with a grain of salt. I’m curious if other have tried something like this or what thoughts there are about this idea. (sorry if this has already been suggested). Assuming staying at your current gym (but training with level 3) is your first option. Figure out your second best option (another gym). Get an offer, then go to your current gym and tell them that if they can’t accommodate your dd at level 3 (or train with level 3) you’re going to walk. Obviously you’ve got to be really to ready to do that.

I know gyms really don't want to lose talented gymnasts. Maybe giving them one last opportunity might get them to reconsider.

 

[sce]

Figure out your second best option (another gym). Get an offer, then go to your current gym and tell them that if they can’t accommodate your dd at level 3 (or train with level 3) you’re going to walk. Obviously you’ve got to be really to ready to do that.

I know gyms really don't want to lose talented gymnasts. Maybe giving them one last opportunity might get them to reconsider.

I think you are misguided with this advice. Most gyms would tell the family to leave if they tried this.

 

[VanessaJV]

I think you are misguided with this advice. Most gyms would tell the family to leave if they tried this.

Leave would be putting it nicely

 

[NY Dad]

Sorry if that was bad advice. I was trying to think outside the box b/c the OP wants to stay at the gym but only under certain conditions. I would think gyms sometimes lose gymnasts when they could have worked something out. I was thinking of it as one last attempt to stay at the gym before actually walking.

I don't want you to mess up your relationship with your current gym if you might find yourself back there at some point in the future. So it seems like you should ignore my previous post.

Edited to add. Hopefully some day I will be able to provide some good advice. I was just trying offer an alternative. For now you should stick with the advice from the pros (not me LOL).

 

[Lilou]

No worries NY Dad. I'm fairly new to all of this and that's why I come here to the board asking for advice since I still learning the unspoken "gym world rules" too. I feel like this situation has me balancing between being my child's advocate and just following along with what the gym says. I feel like I've tried to work with the gym on acceptable options but they are very much, it's A or B (we don't deviate from our traditional thinking of A or B).
Thanks for your ideas though.

Sorry if that was bad advice. I was trying to think outside the box b/c the OP wants to stay at the gym but only under certain conditions. I would think gyms sometimes lose gymnasts when they could have worked something out. I was thinking of it as one last attempt to stay at the gym before actually walking.

I don't want you to mess up your relationship with your current gym if you might find yourself back there at some point in the future. So it seems like you should ignore my previous post.

Edited to add. Hopefully some day I will be able to provide some good advice. I was just trying offer an alternative. For now you should stick with the advice from the pros (not me LOL).

 

[MeetDirector]

Lilou -

Brutal honesty time - the more time you spend "trying" to decide, the more time your dd loses not working level 3 skills at a gym that will support her.

More brutal honesty - why would you want to continue to give your hard-earned money to a gym that does not believe in your dd? Your current gym has told you that.

If gymnastics is your dd's passion and you want to support that passion, you have to get her someplace that will allow her to flourish. Don't worry about anything beyond the near future.

Good Luck.

 

[Lilou]

Agreed MeetDirector... it just took me a little while to get that point since I'm not leaving on bad terms and want to absolutely keep a good relationship with the current gym. Maybe I over-think it too. Trust me that I've been unhappy handing over hundreds of dollars this summer watching no progress and a frustrated kid.
Decision is made. Thank you for insights and support.

Lilou -

Brutal honesty time - the more time you spend "trying" to decide, the more time your dd loses not working level 3 skills at a gym that will support her.

More brutal honesty - why would you want to continue to give your hard-earned money to a gym that does not believe in your dd? Your current gym has told you that.

If gymnastics is your dd's passion and you want to support that passion, you have to get her someplace that will allow her to flourish. Don't worry about anything beyond the near future.

Good Luck.

 

[duyetanh]

Glad decision is made. Get her out of there and give somewhere else a try. Its worth a shot.

 

[Lilou]

So. Another update. We went to another gym today that is not as intense as the other one we visited but more competitive than our current gym. They also said Level 3 for her. My daughter loved it there. We found our new gym!

 

[skschlag]

So. Another update. We went to another gym today that is not as intense as the other one we visited but more competitive than our current gym. They also said Level 3 for her. My daughter loved it there. We found our new gym!

Congrats! It sounds like your dd is happy and ready to go. GOod luck!!!!

 

[NY Dad]

Yay! Happy I could help. LOL

But seriously I hope your dd never looks back. I'm glad you found a good fit for your dd.

 

[sce]

So. Another update. We went to another gym today that is not as intense as the other one we visited but more competitive than our current gym. They also said Level 3 for her. My daughter loved it there. We found our new gym!

Great news!

 

[Lilou]

And now upon telling our old gym that my daughter isn't happy in the L2 class and we're going to be leaving they are going to talk and see about moving her to L3. I'm going to sleep on this... need to clear my head.

 

[Seeker]

And now upon telling our old gym that my daughter isn't happy in the L2 class and we're going to be leaving they are going to talk and see about moving her to L3. I'm going to sleep on this... need to clear my head.

Nope. Just would be prolonging the inevitable.

 

[RTT2]

And now upon telling our old gym that my daughter isn't happy in the L2 class and we're going to be leaving they are going to talk and see about moving her to L3. I'm going to sleep on this... need to clear my head.

Too little too late.