Parents Looking to hear some experiences

[klv8]

I'm looking to hear other people's experiences. My daughter is a deep-thinker, very intelligent - but slow to get skills. She seems to need to mentally understand the skill before she can make her body do it. She'll be the last to get a skill, but the first to make the skill look pretty. The traits that have always made her stand out as the little kid with pointed toes and meticulous technique now seem to be holding her back as other kids are getting skills (albeit imperfectly) and she's not. I've always seen this as a GOOD thing - I'd rather have her take longer to get a skill and do it correctly (and safely) than just be flipping carelessly. BUT all her friends have been "getting" skills left and right, and she's not. And she notices, and is starting to get discouraged.

Some days it seems like she's getting left behind - for instance, everyone else has a particular skill, so no time gets allotted to practicing it anymore, and my daughter still doesn't have it- and isn't likely to get it soon if it isn't being drilled.

So anyway, it's not really something I'm worried about, exactly - we have lots of years left and she's young. But I'm curious to hear what others have experienced and if you have kids like my daughter, what their journey looked like.

 

[Cheryl]

My son was always the first to get skills in compulsory, and was always clean. but now in optionals, there are kids who get skills quicker, especially on floor, that he still struggles with. I wouldn’t worry about it.

Once you get to optionals it’s a lot more difficult to determine the balance between doing an easier and clean routine or technically better routine that is easier.

What your DD performs should be determined by her-does she want a medal or a big challenge. The mantra in our house is “skills over scores” because at some point you need the skill, so why not get it in your routine as early as possible, because then your coach should be working with you at practice to master the skill, rather than the coach thinking your kid is fine with the skills she has and is OK with that.

 

[Cheryl]

It won’t let me edit, but in paragraph 2, I meant easier clean routine or more difficult routine with more deductions and likely a lower score

 

[Deleted member 18037]

My daughter is nearly always last to get things. And they usually have the best form of her team when finally gotten.

I don’t know how old yours is and what level.

I do not however allow anyone to say she is behind. Including her coach. And trust me her coach and I have many conversations over the years about the word “behind”. And the coaches have changed their choice of words.

Example when she stayed L5 and the rest of her team went to L6. She wasn’t “behind” on bars. She needed to get stronger on bars. Words are important.

The other thing we all do, us parents and her coaches is to always let her know she’ll get it, when she gets it. No drama, no pressure. And she always has. She caught up with her team her first season of L7 and their second. Out scored them by States.

Finally video, I still show her, her ugly moves when she was little.

And when she is frustrated by whatever she is currently working we revisit something she now considers “eye-roll easy Moooommm” and I remind her when she thought that was hard and she would never get it.

She is currently a L8 and the only kid on her team to not have her giant yet. Beautiful HS and pirouette but no giant. She also doesn’t talk about what she does in gymnastics. When I ask, she says things. So now I ask the kids we carpool with. I’m told she is doing giants on the strap bar and they are beautiful. No frog legs etc.... coach tells me it’s time to move them to the regular bar. Me I’ve been waiting to see one for 2 years. Who knows maybe at their end of year program.

 

[klv8]

I agree about not using the word "Behind." That was a poor choice of words on my part. Although, I wasn't really referring to HER being behind, but rather just that the rest of the group seems to have moved on, and there are skills she doesn't have that no longer get any practice time, because everyone else has them. So, by "left behind" I didn't mean that she's not where she should be - I just meant that the coach doesn't seems to be meeting her where she's at as far as working certain skills.

It's good to hear that these things seem to work themselves out.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

there are skills she doesn't have that no longer get any practice time, because everyone else has them. So, by "left behind" I didn't mean that she's not where she should be - I just meant that the coach doesn't seems to be meeting her where she's at as far as working certain skills.

I don’t know your kid, level or gym.

But at our gym the coaches need to see the kid wanting to work the skill.

Mine is weak on advocating for herself. We have been working on this. She was injured this season, so there a bunch of meets she didn’t do. And they would be working routines and I’d ask if she was working the skills that she lost due to injury. And she would get all grumpy, no they are doing routines. And I’d go did you ask. She would go ummm no. And I had to tell her you need to ask coaches can I go work my giant on the strap bar, or my twist on the track..... they are just not going to issue you a personal invitation.......
And of course when she asks she can......

So the question becomes is your daughter asking to work the skill?

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Also. Up training happens differently at different gyms.

Our gym uptrains during meet season. But not to the same degree as during the off season.

Our 7/8s 2 weeks ago were not uptraining at all, as they were preparing for states.

States are now done. Yesterday they were all working upgrades.

Time of year matters

 

[Flyaway]

You described my dd exactly. I'll be honest, it's a struggle at times. Most of the time it doesn't seem to bother her, it's harder on me to see her work so hard and not seem to progress at the same rate. I try really hard to remind myself that every gymnast has an individual journey, and they all struggle with things that for the most part can't be seen from the parent section in the gym. I remind my gymnast to stay invested in HER gymnastics and not to worry about what everyone else is doing.