New gym mom.....feeling confused :(

[HMK09]

Hi everyone! I am a relative new gym mom. I have a 4 year old DD on pre-team level 2. She seems to have a natural ability for gymnastics, but I will admit, her life does not revolve around gymnastics. I know that she is very young, so I don't push her at all. She loves the gym and learning new skills. I have been feeling bad lately because a few of DD little friends are amazing gymnasts. 4-6 year olds doing incredible skills, that my DD can't even begin to do (back walkovers on beam, multiple back handsprings, etc.). The reason for this is because her friends spend every waking minute away from the gym, practicing at home (with parents spotting and coming up with daily workouts 2-3 hours long for their kids). One of DD friends (she is 5 or 6 years old) basically has a gym at home. Anyway, my DD gets sad that she can't do some of the skill her friends can do. I tell her that it is because the other girls practice at home, but DD has zero interest in practicing at home. I have tried to get her to stretch and condition a bit, but it is a nightmare. I have come to believe that at 4 years old, she needs to be a kid. She needs to have fun when she is not in the gym, so I don't push her anymore to practice.......but when I see her friends, I wonder if I am making the right decision. As much as I hear "my DD just loooooves to practice, I can't stop her! She does it ALL on her own" I just don't believe it. I can't imagine kids 4-6 years old wanting to spend hours and hours every day stretching and conditioning and working on skills. I can see as they get older wanting to work at home, but not that young??? Sometimes I feel like I am wrong? Should I be encouraging my DD to do more work at home? Sorry this is so long......I really appreciate any advice or wisdom from more seasoned gym parents!!

 

[kandkfunk]

Don't stress it and don't push her! Chances are those other kids will burn out and quit way before your daughter. Plus these kids will probably end up with bad form on the skills they are learning at home. There's a huge difference between doing a skill and doing it correctly. Let the coaches coach and let your daughter be a kid. You're doing great mom.

 

[Seeker]

No, don't encourage her to do anything different. She will progress at whatever rate she progresses at and that is fine. I am pretty sure many of the coaches on here will agree that some of those skills you describe are not safe for kids that age and they really shouldn't be teaching themselves these skills. They will likely teach themselves bad habits and the skill will have to be re-learned anyway. Let your DD enjoy her class and she'll move along at whatever pace is right for her. She is very young!

 

[txgymfan]

"at 4 years old, she needs to be a kid. She needs to have fun when she is not in the gym, so I don't push her anymore to practice......."

You said it! She is 4 she should be having fun at the gym. She will not be behind in any way at all. There is absolutely no need to be serious or to be conditioning at home. When she is not at the gym she should be playing and experiencing life. Take her to a playground, play tag, play T-ball, play dolls, be silly. If she wants more gym later great. She can "catch up" in a few years. Those kids obsessed with gym may still be interested in a few year or they may not but it doesn't matter. Your daughter is doing exactly what is developmentally appropriate for her age. Enjoy gym at the gym and everything else along the way.

 

[HMK09]

Thank you all SO much for your encouraging words! It's just what I needed! I really appreciated it

 

[MaryA]

You sound remarkably balanced and sane. Please don't let gymnastics take that away from you.

 

[Sasha]

Yes, relax and definitely do not worry about what any other girls this age are/aren't doing at home.

A lot of coaches would not want any 4-5 year olds doing back walkovers on beam and back handsprings Some will have these skills by 6 years old if they have been at it a while and are properly conditioned, but not 4-5 as a general rule...

There's no reason at all to enforce any conditioning or other gymnastics at home at age 4. In fact a lot of this community feels NO gym at home is the answer for all ages. Sure, some 4-5 year olds really do like to use that pull-up bar, which is fine for pull ups and leg raises if THEY want to PLAY that way. Great, fine. I have a DS that likes doing pushups and such - cool. But I would not dream of 'making' him condition (he's 6). That wouldn't go well Making your DD do pullups if it isn't her idea is a recipe for hating gymnastics, which would be tragic.

As others have said, playgrounds, other sports, running around and being silly, and all other playful activities are the best recipe for her gymnastics growth. The coaches will give her everything she needs in class. Enjoy gymnastics

 

[bookworm]

Uh, your DD's friends parents are crazy...."coming up with a 2-3 hour work out for their kid"; "having a gym at home" ...read these all back to yourself and thank your lucky stars that you are NOT like them....can you say burnout?

 

[Krystan]

Uh, your DD's friends parents are crazy...."coming up with a 2-3 hour work out for their kid"; "having a gym at home" ...read these all back to yourself and thank your lucky stars that you are NOT like them....can you say burnout?

Seriously! I feel like they are doing the one thing guaranteed to take all the fun out of the sport and have the kids resenting it a few months/years down the line. Sounds like you have a very healthy attitude!

 

[Azgymmiemom]

Always leave 'em wanting more. That's the way to keep them in this sport.

 

[Faith]

Can you also say "spinal stress fractures"?

Most experts these days suggest children under 5 should not be doing bridges at all, and certainly not back walk overs/bhs.

When your dd is 10 and still has a functional spine, and those other kids are walking physio appointments....

For what it's worth, my dd (no phenom talent) and her friend walked on to team age 7 and had caught up with all those children who started age 4/5 within 6 months.

 

[HMK09]

Thank you all so much! You have no idea how much you have reassured me that I'm doing the right thing. Now when I see FB videos of DD's 4 year old friend doing back-walkovers and round-off double back handsprings on her home equipment- spotted by mom- I don't feel so bad. I now have confidence that DD will catch up when the time is right. Does anyone have advice about what I can tell DD? Her face falls and she says "mommy I can't do that, I wish I could do that." I don't want to say anything negative about DD friends practicing at home and their crazy parents, because as most of you know, nothing is secret with a 4- year old.....

 

[gothgymmom]

Tell her it will come to her in time. My DD is like that as well, and I tell her time and time again that she will be able to do that stuff as she goes along in gym. Now i have a mat at home and a cheese mat, and also a high and floor beam, (all ok'd by coach - they give me little books they make to help my DD to try to remember her routines as she has problems remembering them) but she doesnt try to do anything she knows she cant, or shouldnt. Most of the time its just handstands, F & B WO, cartwheels, stuff like that. And believe you me when I tell you that she does this all on her own. I do not have set times or any conditioning schedules set up for her. She literally wakes in the morning doing handstands, splits, etc and does it until she goes to bed. I have to tell her to calm down alot of the times. I cannot say that those other parents make their children, but know there are children that just do it because they love it...like mine lol. and she always does the stuff in her routines as well..with the exception of the handsprings as they are not in her routines yet but as they are practing them at the gym, she knows how its supposed to go. she also used the mats to help her cousin work on her flexibility as she is an aspiring dancer and kinda has to be flexible.