Parents Post gym switch syndrome

[blueberrygym]

So 5 days ago I made the decision to switch my DD to a new gym that focuses more on form, conditioning and technique after two years at her old gym. She hasn't even started her summer training and I'm feeling all kinds of guilt and regret, not to mention anxiety about the 22-mile vs 5-mile commute (I work full-time from home and also have two other kids to worry about). I NEVER thought I would feel this way. Sigh. I was so excited about her new option and so is she. Please tell me these feelings are normal. Because I'm thinking its too late to go back to her current gym and say "oops, just kidding." Not to mention I'm feeling regretful about not choosing our second choice gym for the switch which is only 10 miles away. It is a better choice for the commute and family commitments.

 

[Gymnast C's mom]

First of all take a deep breath. These things have a way of working out. I would say at this point it makes the most sense to try the gym that you have decided to switch to and see how it goes. Give it some time and maybe the commute and family commitments will fall into place. If it seems like maybe it's not working after a reasonable amount of time then there is always the 2nd choice gym that is 10 miles away. Good luck!!

 

[Seeker]

Give it a little time. Maybe you'll be able to find a car pool too, once you get to know folks.

 

[bookworm]

22 miles! I would have loved that! Our last commute was 80 miles each way and I have 2 other kids and work as well but seriously, things have a way of working out....give it time and you'll get the whole routine down to a science...and your daughter will be better off gymnastically...so take a deep breath or two.

Most of us have been where you are (albeit, I never had a closer option than 40 minutes) but once you've made the gym move , you'll wonder why you waited so long to do it.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Normal to second guess.

I doubled our commute. Not as many miles as you but time wise, I tripled our time in the car. High traffic time is 40 mins one way. Low traffic 20.

Don't know how hateful (or not) your 22 miles are. But car time can be a nice time. Some of my best conversations with the kids happen in the car.

 

[blueberrygym]

Thanks everyone! You're right. I just need to breathe and calm down. It's crazy because I can't concentrate on anything else because I feel like I need to hurry up and make sure I'm confident in my decision before summer training starts next week. It doesn't help that my closest friends are in my ear saying "no way can you drive all the way to this new gym." We are all used to our bubbles in the city, and driving out to the suburbs in horrible highway traffic during rush hour is for crazy people. I just looked at the numbers again though, and the gym we didn't choose is $1500 more than the one we chose (and $2300 more than the gym I'm leaving). Total reality check!

 

[blueberrygym]

Normal to second guess.

I doubled our commute. Not as many miles as you but time wise, I tripled our time in the car. High traffic time is 40 mins one way. Low traffic 20.

Don't know how hateful (or not) your 22 miles are. But car time can be a nice time. Some of my best conversations with the kids happen in the car.

Apparently the traffic can be horrible. I work from home now, so I'm not familiar with the traffic. But I tested out a couple of routes over the past few days for a sanity check. It took 45-50 minutes in bad traffic and 25-30 minutes with no traffic. Summer would probably be easy because the summer training hours are not during rush hour. It's going to be the fall schedule that will be telling. My daughter told me she will just read, take a nap, or do homework in the car though

 

[wallinbl]

Changing gyms is emotionally difficult. It's fraught with doubt and anxiety for both gymnast and parent. That's normal.

Relax a bit and wait it out. Soon, things will be smooth out, your daughter will make friends and click with the coaches, and you'll be wondering why it took you so long to do it.

 

[skschlag]

We switched this fall from a gym 15 minutes away to one 45 minutes away. 40 minutes with zero traffic, which is never, and has been up to 90 with traffic. I went through all of these feelings too. No way could this work. No way would he want to keep doing this. No way will he continue.
Now, we are 9 months in and it has been the absolute best decision. he sleeps, listens to music, does homework, or talks to me on teh trip. No real complaining (other than getting up early in the mornings this summer, but even that has been minor). He loves it, and has come sooo far.

 

[tortuga]

We did a switch this spring, an easy 2 miles away down a 45mph blvd to 15 miles away in commute traffic. We're making changes to the schedule still to tweak for best use of time. but the change for DD has been fantastic. Totally worth it.

 

[Along4theRide]

We have a similar commute. Thankfully, we have found a few families to carpool with. Girls chat, listen to music, and play games. I use the solo leg of the drive to listen to *my* music or audio books. The extra driving time (and $) is worth it to be at this new gym. I hope you find your rhythm soon!

 

[3rd_time_around]

Thanks everyone! You're right. I just need to breathe and calm down. It's crazy because I can't concentrate on anything else because I feel like I need to hurry up and make sure I'm confident in my decision before summer training starts next week. It doesn't help that my closest friends are in my ear saying "no way can you drive all the way to this new gym." We are all used to our bubbles in the city, and driving out to the suburbs in horrible highway traffic during rush hour is for crazy people. I just looked at the numbers again though, and the gym we didn't choose is $1500 more than the one we chose (and $2300 more than the gym I'm leaving). Total reality check!

It is kind of humorous to me, because I used to drive 45 min one way, and that was with very little traffic due to being in the country. 22 miles would have been a vacation to me. Now I still drive 20-25 minutes 1-way, and I feel like I'm so close. Good luck at the new gym!

 

[kitkat]

Totally normal. I remember Alex cried all the way home the first day. I thought what have I done. That was her only day she cried and it all ended up good. Our comute was 25 miles as well and I worked out of the home full time.
Deep breathe. It's all good. But don't show her your anxiety that will make her anxious. Good luck

 

[skschlag]

d cried all the way home from his first practice at the new gym too. has not looked back.

 

[Gymmom826]

So 5 days ago I made the decision to switch my DD to a new gym that focuses more on form, conditioning and technique after two years at her old gym. She hasn't even started her summer training and I'm feeling all kinds of guilt and regret, not to mention anxiety about the 22-mile vs 5-mile commute (I work full-time from home and also have two other kids to worry about). I NEVER thought I would feel this way. Sigh. I was so excited about her new option and so is she. Please tell me these feelings are normal. Because I'm thinking its too late to go back to her current gym and say "oops, just kidding." Not to mention I'm feeling regretful about not choosing our second choice gym for the switch which is only 10 miles away. It is a better choice for the commute and family commitments.

Same happened to me. Left a gym we could literally walk to! To one an hour and twenty minutes away. It worked out fine. Just take it a day at a time. If you look at it from the length of time it can be overwhelming. I wasn't sure if I could do it at times either and it's been four years now.

 

[CLgym]

I also left a gym within walking distance of both my house and the kids' schools -- for one that is a brutal drive away (about 9 miles that can take anywhere from 25-50 minutes depending on city traffic). Everyone thought I was nuts. And for awhile I wondered if maybe I was?!? I slowly got over my "post gym switch syndrome" by focusing on my DD's excitement at being able to try JO (old gym had placed her in Xcel with no hope of moving). I had one good friend from old gym who had also left around the same time, and she was a great help in reassuring me we had made the right decision. I took the drive one day at a time. The WAZE app became my new best friend. Both DD and I made new friends at the new gym. Now, one year later, I can say we are glad we made the switch (even if I'm not happy with the drive some days). Good luck and keep us posted!

 

[blueberrygym]

Thanks everyone for the responses! It gave me a LOT to think about. I talked it through with my husband and we decided that the 45-50 minute drive was going to be too much for me to handle with the other family demands. We accepted the spot with the second choice gym (and surprisingly, he was o.k. with the price difference). At the end of the day, going from a 12-minute drive at our old gym to a 25-minute drive at the new gym will feel much better than going to a 50-minute drive. I'm feeling more at peace now and my post gym switch jitters have gone away. And best of all, I'm not feeling any guilt about leaving her old team given some things I've heard about how the HC reacted to some other parents who recently left. Anyway, my DD starts training with her new team on Monday! And I wanted to add that the second choice gym is indeed a GREAT gym (probably the best in the city). But the higher scores they achieve means more commitment, so I hope my DD can keep up with their strict training culture. Will keep everyone posted!