For Parents Pushing kids until they cry?Just part of gymnastics?

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dsabrunner

Proud Parent
May 20, 2015
10
52
I know that gymnastics is a tough sport and that conditioning is not fun or easy. I also know that in order to get better/stronger you need to push beyond your limits. Is it typical/normal for the girls to be pushed in conditioning until they cry? This is most of the team crying, not just my daughter (girls ages 7-9). Wondering if this is just a normal part of gymnastics and a necessary part of the process in other's experience? Can't help but feel bad when I see the kids crying.
 

Kate E

Proud Parent
Apr 29, 2014
96
48
Surrey, UK
My DD 6 has never cried but she tells me of girls crying during conditioning a lot...seem to be the same 3/4. I don't know what I'd do if it was mine crying as it can't be nice but I dos recall her telling me one week that a coach (no longer there) told the girls when they were doing conditioning on bars 'if you're not crying you're not trying hard enough'!!
 

Judybird

Proud Parent
Jan 13, 2015
47
47
Crying during conditioning by new team girls at the beginning of summer training is very common. However, crying mid-season by girls who have been on team for a while would be unusual.
 

twinmomma

Proud Parent
Jun 13, 2013
1,191
California
DD's flexibility is literally her biggest weakness. In the beginning she would cry, but not anymore. I think with her it was more of a case of not knowing what to expect or how it would feel. Now she knows and it's no big deal for coach to stretch her.
 

Scotsgirl

Proud Parent
Jan 21, 2015
207
46
Scotland
I would not be happy if I walked into dd training and there was a group of kids crying , this would set alarm bells ringing for me , I know kids cry but at the ages 7-9 gymnstics is all about fun yes they have to work hard but jeez oh not that hard , I know some one whos kid cried and got upset at training but simply because she was not happy and she was tired in her class , her mum had her daughter placed in a class suited better to her dd problem solved . I woud actually be horrified and have to question this , the poor kids will end up being forced to quit their sport , I personally dont think this is right .
 

Momof2

Proud Parent
Jul 17, 2014
67
My daughter actually cried today during conditioning. She was the only one. It was causing her knee to hurt. I have seen kids on occasion cry but that is not the normal and not every practice.
 

2G1B

Proud Parent
Jan 27, 2013
2,226
I don't like to see kids cry from stretching, that seems like they are stretching too far. But conditioning? My son has cried a few times this summer while doing summer conditioning. I have talked to him about it and decided I'm OK with it. His coach has even commented in it - my son and a few other boys keep going with conditioning even when it really hurts, they cry; but keep going. Some of the other boys don't cry; but you see them stopping before they hit that limit. So sure, my kid is crying; but he is choosing to keep pushing himself rather than taking a break. I have used it for inspiration for myself in my own workouts. I feel like I can't possibly do one more of whatever exercise and I want to stop, then I think about DS and realize I'm not even near crying, so I suck it up and keep going to finish the set. Even still, I realize I have never worked as hard in a workout as he has.

DS's coaches rarely fuss at the kids who stop for rests if they think that the kid really is near their limit; but at the same time the coaches have taken notice of DS and the boys who push through and don't rest. I have talked to DS even right after practice and he says he is fine and it never makes him waiver in wanting to go to practice. Though, DS is 11. I'd likely feel different if he was 7.
 
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raenndrops

Coach
Oct 24, 2009
6,751
The 'Wood, Ohio
The only time I have seen a gymmie cry during stretching or conditioning was YG... a few weeks ago when they had to hold their "bad leg" split for 2 minutes. The Assistant HC came over and saw the same thing I did with her ligaments - fully stretched and no where close to being down... stupid growth spurts.
If it was the whole team, it would be a worry. With just 1 or 2 girls, extra homework might help. We are doing that with YG.
 

Azgymmiemom

Proud Parent
Mar 12, 2010
2,251
Arizona
Crying because of something hard, over coming a fear, determination or because of frustration is okay and normal. If it is because of pain or humiliation , absolutely not okay. This sport is hard. Tears are sometimes a part of it, but not if it is one of these negatives.
 

proud-gym-mom

Proud Parent
Nov 14, 2014
80
48
Most of the time in our gym it's the older girls and it's usually out of frustration - trying to get a skill, having a bad practice… most likely hormones thrown in the mix too :). It's rare that the younger kids cry at all. A tantrum every once and awhile but if it's from pain it's usually that they're hurt or scared and then the coach takes care of them and calms them or soothes them, gets ice etc. My dd has only had a few tears in practice in the 5 years she's been in the gym and both that I can remember have been when she was older (10ish) and more out of frustration with herself and trying to get a skill. She has had tough conditioning but she usually smiles through it and makes funny faces. Tears from pain being inflicted by someone else are not OK with me - whether it's yelling or pushing them way to hard… this is a tough sport but it's also supposed to be fun!
 

AGymDad

Proud Parent
Jun 12, 2015
18
42
It's not normal for kids to cry at a gym. This is supposed to be fun, especially for the age group you specify.
The only moments I have ever seen crying at our gym is because someone got injured or a kid got emotional because of something that happened.
 
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z2akids

Proud Parent
May 19, 2014
711
It isn't unusual to have one or two girls with a couple of tears during those first couple of weeks of summer schedule. They really up the conditioning and sometimes you get a girl or two who is pushed to that brink. But it is never the whole team and generally only happens a couple of times at the start of that high conditioning season.

My DD was a bit teary (had to step into the ladies' room to splash water on her face) last year when her coach told her that he would not spot her ROBHS. She knew he hadn't been actually spotting her for weeks, but she was scared to not have his hand right near her back. But, she collected herself and hasn't needed a spit since. It was the right thing for her.
 
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wgymmom

Proud Parent
Aug 21, 2013
742
Most of the team would bother me. A few girls, not so much. DD is pretty tough and I've watched her in conditioning and she's been near tears but held them back. That's not uncommon.
 

AgingHippie

Proud Parent
May 5, 2015
512
Yes, this did happen at our gym last year. There would be maybe one or two out of a large number (20+) that were not crying. It was the rope climbs, but it was only for one or two practices and it looked like a lot of girls got the corrections they weren't making that was causing the climb. It was not a regular practice though. If that had been going on all year I bet some kids would start dropping from gym.
 

mom2newgymnast

Proud Parent
Jul 8, 2014
1,228
48
I haven't seen that at my dd's gym. The only crying I have seen is when someone is hurt or, occasionally, when one of the girls (including mine) gets frustrated at themselves because they aren't getting the corrections. I've never seen crying during conditioning and my dd is in a group with a similar age range. She's 7 and the girls in her group range from 7-9.
 

gymmomtotwo

Proud Parent
Jun 21, 2011
478
No, I have never seen any crying during conditioning. The coaches have them do a lot of different chants and things to make it more team oriented and bearable. They like to see how loud they can be and how well they can stay in sync with each other. Come to think of it, I don't really see any tears Most of the time that I am watching the group (ages 8-12 Training6) seem happy. They were Level 4 state champs this year, and their coaches maintain an amazing positive atmosphere. I would be horrified to walk in the door to find them all crying. I can't even imagine a such a scenario except a favorite coach leaving or someone dying.

No way, no how is that normal. Who would want a kid that age to be crying like that just for gymnastics?
 
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