Anon Travel meets are too much for us and I don't know how to explain that to the coaches... Do we get kicked out?

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We have 2 or 3 travel meets every year, and this is our second year competing. I have 2 kids in the DP (3 and 5), and they usually have a meet one day apart (e.g. Fri/L3 and Sun/L5), which means more expense for the hotel. The first travel meet was close and next to our state, so it was drivable. The next one cost us about $2500 in total (3.5 hours of flights), and another one coming up with 6 hours of flights will cost us $3500 in total (hotel, rental car, food, flights). My children are nowhere on the elite route although they are thriving, and our gymnastics is not so the top level/intense gymnastics around here. Granted the travel meets are more of a 'reward' and bonding event for the hard-working gymnasts, it's too much for my family. I would like to be honest and message this to the owner and cancel the last travel meet (we pay for everything on time, so it is just simply this meet expense we want to save). I feel already bad enough for my children as they are the only ones that are not going out of all DP gymnasts, but they are also mature enough to understand where we are at financially. The owner makes it sound as if participating in all the meets is mandatory (although the expense is not stated in the team handbook), and I don't want my children to be kicked out of this gym as they love this sport, their gym friends, and coaches. As you can probably tell by this point English is my not my first language and I am afraid I message this in a wrong manner ending up offending the owner. How should I word the situation to the owner and gain their understanding? Any thoughts? Please help.
 
If you can't do the meets then yeah they might ask you to leave the team at the end of the year or if they have an Xcel team that travels less they may offer that as an alternative for the upcoming season.

In any case you may want to research other gyms in the area to see if they have a meet schedule that fits your family better.
 
It is worth a conversation. Many gyms understand the financial side. Most gyms where I am will allow kids to miss the fly-away meets. In addition, I question having to do that many far away meets at levels 3 and 5. When they get to optionals, it makes way more sense.

Odds are you might be able to get your travel expenses back but if you have already paid the fees to the gym, you probably will not get those back. Still saving you money, but maybe not the whole amount.
 
I definitely recommend talking with the gym. That seems like a lot to require gymnasts at the lower levels to have to fly to meets due to distance. Our gym only has one meet a year that requires airplane travel. And only the levels 8-10 and diamond attend. If they say that the meets are required, I recommend looking at other gyms in the area that do not require long distance travel.
 
Instead of an email, I would recommend having a conversation in person. I would think most gym owners are aware of the significant financial cost, particularly since you have two gymnasts, and would be understanding of that.
 
Thank you all for the insights and advice. I will try talking to the owner in person and explain the situation honestly. I really hope that the owner will understand and let us stay in the gym next year too. My kids will be very disappointed to lose friendship and coaches. They are already sad to not be able to go to this fly away meet.
 
Our gym is very understanding about travel meets. You can opt out of as many meets as you want although if you planned on not competing at all I dont think they would be ok with that. That being said they do all drivable meets for the compusory levels (2-5) this is the first year we had mostly travel meets and its upper optionals. Middle optionals have a mix of local and travel. I find it surprising they have this many flight meets for levels 3 and 5. I would talk to them. If they arent understanding I think thats pretty crummy. We have had some conversations about travel costs this year and my husband and I agreed next year the travel meets will probably be me and my daughter not the whole family or let her do the team travel which would be cheaper since we are just paying for one flight instead of all 4 of us. Doing every travel meet as a family of 4 is getting pricey. I would rather save that $$ for a more tropical destination lol.

They probably want everyone to go because it makes it cheaper for those who are going. For example if they 5 level 10s them splitting the cost for a fly away meet (coaches flgihts hotels per diems etc) would be pretty high. But if EVERYONE goes level 3-10 you have 50 people splitting that cost.

I saw that happen with TOPS testing they would encourage all the girls to travel for these tests and pay/split the fees when only 2 of the 10 girls going had a shot at actually qualifying for tops. One person gave me a bit of a hard time about being in the TOPS class but not doing the test...but i knew the requirements and my kid was never going to make it so why am I going to spend all this money to send her to a test? Just so its cheaper for the 2 that actually have a shot no thanks (that was part of a larger issue with tops though).
 
Our gym is very understanding about travel meets. You can opt out of as many meets as you want although if you planned on not competing at all I dont think they would be ok with that. That being said they do all drivable meets for the compusory levels (2-5) this is the first year we had mostly travel meets and its upper optionals. Middle optionals have a mix of local and travel. I find it surprising they have this many flight meets for levels 3 and 5. I would talk to them. If they arent understanding I think thats pretty crummy. We have had some conversations about travel costs this year and my husband and I agreed next year the travel meets will probably be me and my daughter not the whole family or let her do the team travel which would be cheaper since we are just paying for one flight instead of all 4 of us. Doing every travel meet as a family of 4 is getting pricey. I would rather save that $$ for a more tropical destination lol.

They probably want everyone to go because it makes it cheaper for those who are going. For example if they 5 level 10s them splitting the cost for a fly away meet (coaches flgihts hotels per diems etc) would be pretty high. But if EVERYONE goes level 3-10 you have 50 people splitting that cost.

I saw that happen with TOPS testing they would encourage all the girls to travel for these tests and pay/split the fees when only 2 of the 10 girls going had a shot at actually qualifying for tops. One person gave me a bit of a hard time about being in the TOPS class but not doing the test...but i knew the requirements and my kid was never going to make it so why am I going to spend all this money to send her to a test? Just so its cheaper for the 2 that actually have a shot no thanks (that was part of a larger issue with tops though).
Thank you for the reply. Our gymnastics size is relatively small, and it makes sense that all Excel/DP/Optionals are 'required' to go to the meet, otherwise the coach fees are not collected sufficiently to support their travel expenses. As we pay all costs (collected separately specifically for the coaches' travel expenses) on time and the loss is simply my own family's experience and opportunity only, it at least makes me feel better that we are not inconveniencing anyone at our gym. The handbook states that all athletes are required to pay for the coaches' travel expenses even if we do not go to the meets, so we are not even expecting any sort of refund.
 
We pay our assessments ahead of time so opting out of a meet does not financially hurt the coaching staff. We did opt out of the travel meet in L3 and I explained that we did not want to have that expense at the lower levels but would fly when she reached optionals. Then Covid hit and it was a moot point. We now do the travel meets now in optionals.
 
Our coaching fees are collected monthly, so split equally regardless of your choice to go. We always do all the meets, but I'd feel totally comfortable if we didn't. Not everyone has an extra $2000-$5000 to blow flying to some random place for a weekend gym comp. I'd be pretty uncomfortable being at a gym that doesn't take that into account.
 
You shouldn’t be kicked out for this; our gym does a travel meet across the country and it’s understood that several kids won’t go to it because of the expenses. We get our money back if we inform the gym early enough. 3 travel meets for compulsory seems insane
 
Updates - I talked to the coaches last night and they offered to message our decision to the owner. It appears there's no problem and we can stay in the same gym next year. Thanks everyone for chiming in and sharing your thoughts. I agree this many travel meets are insane for my lower-level gymnasts though. There are many local competitive meets...
 

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