For Parents Uneventful update! And opinions welcome on little DD.

[UnoMas]

Hi all, thought I would check in. Nothing too thrilling to report gym-wise as both DD's seasons are over and are repeating their current levels. "Summer" conditioning season has begun, which my older DD does not love. Younger DD likes conditioning, so she is fine with it.

"Tiny" DD is still plugging along in gymnastics. She almost has her pullover, which is exciting. She can do a forward roll on the beam (low beam). The child cannot do a cartwheel to save her life though. She has started a tumbling class at a local cheerleading gym and is really liking the cheerleading atmosphere. Uh oh.

Older DD is doing well right now. She seems to be making progress on her vault (can I dream about maybe an 8.5 next season?). She seems to be pretty happy at the gym even though she did not move up to L6. I think maybe just maybe she is gaining a little bit of confidence...I hope. She was with some superstars last season and it was hard for her to keep up. Although, you never know who will end up the star by the end of the season, right?

Little DD...sigh. She is still struggling with bars. Mill circle is 50/50 and there is no FHC in sight. Not even close really! I am not sure what to do about her. I know it is only April, but she has been training L4 for a full year with no complete bar routine. I am wondering what to do about next season. I know, it's several months away, but I hate for her to compete a season again missing skills. Meet fees will start coming due at the end of the summer. It's one thing to be missing a couple skills as a young first year 4, but as a second year? Sigh. Her beam is also still really weak. Her muscle issues and right-sided weakness (and turned in foot) are really making it hard. She is still scared of the beam some, too. Her TOPs skills, on the other hand, are coming along well (she will be testing as a 7 year old in June and July). She can do everything except the press handstands. Pretty amazing. Her cast handstands are even getting a lot better. It's so hard with her, because she can do so much (BHS, floor dance, leaps, and strength stuff)...but there is so much she can't do. I would love to be able to put her in a prep opt program to play up her strenghths...but our gym doesn't have that. I also wish our gym had a "preteam" where she could hang out until she was really ready with her L4 stuff...but we don't have that either. She skipped from L2 to L4 which I think really hurt her (she would have at least mastered some of the beam a little better and the mill circle in L3).

Part of me would like to meet with the coach and suggest that if she does not have the bar skills and a beam routine that can at least get an 8 or so (she was in the 5's and 6's last year)...that she shouldn't compete. I would really hate to have her quit gym...but to compete a second year with missing skills, I'm just not sure. I am not sure what our coach would say to that suggestion, either. Also not sure how DD would feel about not competing with her team. I know meets are not about winning and I don't expect her to win, but I just wonder if being last in most events is a good thing, either, especially as a second year. I guess the missing skills bother me more than the finishing last thing.

Thoughts and opinions? If this were your DD and your situation, what would you think?

This ended up being long again. Guess I just like to hear myself type!

 

[LMV]

How does your daughter feel about all of this? Is she ok with competing partial routines? Would she miss the meets if you took a season [or maybe a year] off to focus mainly on training? I don't have great advice because our daughter's gym doesn't compete prior to L5 and she didn't even live with us during the L5-L7 days. Hence, my compulsory gymnastics experience is limited to what I vaguely remember from my husband's baby sister's early gymnastics days [and she just finished competing her freshman year of college gymnastics so you can see it's been awhile] and some sessions we have attended to cheer for some of our daughter's compulsory teammates. I do know at our gym they do consider having good potential to score at least an 8.0 on all events one of the guidelines for being ready to compete.

 

[nevertooold]

It is entirely reasonable to question why you are paying meet fees for a child who doesn't have all their skills.

It isn't "about" winning but putting a child out there without a consistent mill circle or FHC is setting them up to fail.

I don't really know what to tell you except trust your gut as a mother, if it's feeling wrong to you, it probably us.

 

[UnoMas]

How does your daughter feel about all of this? Is she ok with competing partial routines? Would she miss the meets if you took a season [or maybe a year] off to focus mainly on training? .

My little DD is so very mellow. She does not seem to be worried about any of it. I have talked to her about it being really important to try and learn the bar skills...to try her hardest. Her mellow personality hurts her in gymnastics sometimes, I think. So many gymmies are so competitive and driven. She is determined...but not competitive. She would have to go to the meets anyway because of her older sister, but I am honestly not sure if she would miss competing. Maybe a good plan is to give it all a couple more momths and then really talk to DD about it.

 

[lhmom]

Well, if you take her off the competitive team, is there maybe tumbling classes she could take a few days a week? Or does your gym have a tumbling team? There were a few girls on my daughter's pre-team who went that route and really enjoy it. It's hard to see them struggle with the skills, isn't it? Good luck!

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

My little DD is so very mellow. She does not seem to be worried about any of it. I have talked to her about it being really important to try and learn the bar skills...to try her hardest. Her mellow personality hurts her in gymnastics sometimes, I think. So many gymmies are so competitive and driven. She is determined...but not competitive. She would have to go to the meets anyway because of her older sister, but I am honestly not sure if she would miss competing. Maybe a good plan is to give it all a couple more momths and then really talk to DD about it.

my DD is very mellow also! Where she finishes at a meet never really matters to her. She just enjoys competing! Please keep that in mind! If she enjoys it she won't care where she places. And she does have a while yet to practice those skills! I thought for sure that Alex would NEVER get her FHC or Kip but one day they just clicked and I have to say (shamless brag here) that because she took so long getting them they were pretty much form perfect from then on! My DD is probably also repeating her level mostly due to the fact that she has some fear issues with a couple of the L6 skills but she still loves gymnastics and loves competing! I can be sooo hard to watch them struggle but when it all comes together she will be so proud of herself!

 

[emorymom]

Power tumbling?
Privates?
Cross training for the weak side issue?
Not compete L4 again and just compete L5 when ready?

 

[GymnastJoy]

My advice is to go with your mother's instinct and your dd's desire. I believe that even though gymnastics can be such a competitive sport, that success is measured in many ways. I watched your videos of dd and thought that she looked like she was really enjoying herself competing. Her coach seemed to be very responsive to her needs and super supportive. I would go with that. Although it's a difficult descision, I am guessing from reading posts on this board that others in the same situation would not even have the chance to have their dd compete. If it were my dd, I would go with what she wants to do when the season get closer. Alot can change by then. Especially since her older (and younger) sister also does gym. I would personally hate to hear that she (or any other gymmie) quit because they weren't "good enough".

 

[gym law mom]

I think you and her coach/s need to sit down and come up with some sort of plan for her summer training. There are areas she needs more help with than the other girls and areas where she'll be fine without much practice other than what the rest of the team does---if that. What about not having her compete in the 1st couple of meets to give her a little more time to work on bars/beam?

 

[UnoMas]

Well, if you take her off the competitive team, is there maybe tumbling classes she could take a few days a week? Or does your gym have a tumbling team? There were a few girls on my daughter's pre-team who went that route and really enjoy it. It's hard to see them struggle with the skills, isn't it? Good luck!

Thanks for the suggestion. She would love a tumbling team I think. We used to have tramp/tumble but now that team is gone. She would have been great with that (no icky bars and beam!) What's so hard is that she really thrives on the "team" hours (she goes 15 hrs and never complains, plus it helps so much with her physically...in other areas of her life, not gym). I have thought of just rec classes but I'd have to take out a loan to afford more than a couple a week (they are $$$ compared to team!).

 

[UnoMas]

... I thought for sure that Alex would NEVER get her FHC or Kip but one day they just clicked and I have to say (shamless brag here) that because she took so long getting them they were pretty much form perfect from then on! ...

I love this. This is EXACTLY how she was with her L2 bars. It took almost a year for her to do the skills, but she learned them all on the same day and they were all with straight legs since she had been spotted SO many times. She got a 9.45 on her L2 bar routine! Her highest score! I guess I am just not sure how long to wait for it to click...it has been a full year.

 

[UnoMas]

My advice is to go with your mother's instinct and your dd's desire. I believe that even though gymnastics can be such a competitive sport, that success is measured in many ways. I watched your videos of dd and thought that she looked like she was really enjoying herself competing. Her coach seemed to be very responsive to her needs and super supportive. I would go with that. Although it's a difficult descision, I am guessing from reading posts on this board that others in the same situation would not even have the chance to have their dd compete. If it were my dd, I would go with what she wants to do when the season get closer. Alot can change by then. Especially since her older (and younger) sister also does gym. I would personally hate to hear that she (or any other gymmie) quit because they weren't "good enough".

Thank you...and you are right about many with my daughter's skill level not even being able to compete. Our gym does thing its own way, that is for sure. Her coaches do support her. They all adore her. She adores them. It is all happy and great until she gets to the meets and she just looks so out of place. I would hate for her to quit too, I would, and I don't want to do that except as a last resort.

 

[UnoMas]

Power tumbling?
Privates?
Cross training for the weak side issue?
Not compete L4 again and just compete L5 when ready?

Great ideas, thank you. We have done about a million privates with her (seems like it anyway). She learned her mill circle for the first time at a private. I was thinking of doing a series of very short private lessons just on bars at first. The L5 thing is not an option as our gym requires a 36AA move up score (yikes, she seriously may never be able to attain that). Love the idea though.

 

[UnoMas]

I think you and her coach/s need to sit down and come up with some sort of plan for her summer training. There are areas she needs more help with than the other girls and areas where she'll be fine without much practice other than what the rest of the team does---if that. What about not having her compete in the 1st couple of meets to give her a little more time to work on bars/beam?

Thank you. I think we need a plan, too. Our HC is not a fan of parent meetings, and I dislike the thought of a meeting like that immensely, but I think what usually works with most kids is not working here, and maybe another plan is needed. DD has had SOOOO many new girls come up to L4 over the past year and just leap right past her within a month or so (even girls her own age). Sigh. I think she will likely not be able to compete our 2 "fall" meets (Oct/Nov) which is fine, but January and the regular meet season will come up quick.

 

[UnoMas]

I really appreciate all the thoughts and ideas here. Please feel free to keep them coming. I was hesitant to post this for many reasons. Her situation is unique and I didn't want to seem negative or like all I cared about was her winning. I never intended for her to be on a competitive team. It just sort of happened because she showed a lot of promise in the flexibility area early on...plus she takes direction very well and is a great listener. I just want what is best for her, and I just am really having a hard time judging what that is. I know that summer will fly by and I hope so much that she can get those skills, but I just really don't know. I know that it will be time to pay meet fees before I know it!!!

 

[LMV]

After reading your responses to my questions and other posts I think I might have a slightly different perspective. It sounds like if your gym is ok with her competing to the best of her ability and she is happy and safe doing this [and my sense from what you've posted is that she is] then maybe it is time to step back and see where she takes herself.

As a sort of related question is she currently working with a PT and or OT? It might help if they sat down with her coaches [or perhaps if they sat down with you if the coaches are not likely to have time to meet with them] and discussed how gymnastics might be adapted a little to work with her physical challenges and perhaps how gymnastics might be helpful to improving some of these issues overall.

 

[UnoMas]

After reading your responses to my questions and other posts I think I might have a slightly different perspective. It sounds like if your gym is ok with her competing to the best of her ability and she is happy and safe doing this [and my sense from what you've posted is that she is] then maybe it is time to step back and see where she takes herself.

As a sort of related question is she currently working with a PT and or OT? It might help if they sat down with her coaches [or perhaps if they sat down with you if the coaches are not likely to have time to meet with them] and discussed how gymnastics might be adapted a little to work with her physical challenges and perhaps how gymnastics might be helpful to improving some of these issues overall.

She "graduated" from PT when she was 3 (right before she started gym) and OT stopped last summer, too. I do know some OT's and PT's though (I am a speech therapist)...maybe I can recruit their ideas and help! Thanks!!

 

[Sunobo]

Well my dd finally got her FHC it at a meet as a 3rd year level 4. (We switched gyms after the 2nd year) She got her kip at a meet too. While my dd would get frustrated at times, I would remind her that it's okay to be frustrated and that eventually she would get the skill but she if she gave up, the skill would never arrive. As a level 5, she struggled with bars, vault and floor. She had to scratch bars (kip and jump to high bar) and floor at lots of meets because of BWO and BHS fear issues but she did well on beam and got some metals. It was a year of huge struggles so when she got a metal, it made it all that more special to her.

Anyway, my suggestion would be let your dd lead the way on what she is most comfortable doing. Let her tell you if she wants to compete or not. The skills will eventually come and because she worked so hard for them, they will be extra special when they arrive. I'm all for letting kids compete with missing skills as long as it's not a majority of the skills and they are enjoying what they are doing. Skills or no skills, somebody has to come in first and somebody has to come in last.

If she wants to continue with some sort of gymnastics you could look into rhythmic gymnastics. You mentioned something about her showing promise with her flexibility and it doesn't involve those icky bars and beam.