Parents Update on my DD (Parenting crisis thread)!

DON'T LURK... Join The Discussion!

Members see FEWER ads

So, after all of the cumulative issues my DD dealt with at her gym, I am proud to say that we ran. It took me a week to actually make it "official", as it seriously felt like I'd imagine a divorce would. We got our freedom, sanity and well-being, but the gym kept all of our close friends. :(

So, the very next day I called a few area gyms. Of course it was the weekend of our state meet, so no coaches were available to chat or evaluate my DD. Of course, I understood that but it didn't ease my own anxiety much. Well, lo and behold the coach from one of the gyms called me on that Saturday, and was kind enough to spend a good 20 minutes on the phone with me. I was very frank (without bashing the other gym) and explained my DD's issues, as well as my own. I explained DD and I were both a little gun-shy to try again. We decided to let my DD practice there the following week. I was nervous as it's a bit of a trek (about 40-45 minutes with minor traffic).

DD absolutely loved the practice. She adored the coach and the girls really reached out to her. The first one, the coach had promised a treat since the girls all "did their best" at the state meet (L3), so she let them break 15 minutes early. She gave the girls cupcakes, gave high-fives and did some icebreakers to help my DD feel like part of the group. DD then did ballet for an hour (brand-new to her). Normally, they get the last 5 minutes of her gymnastic sessions as "free time", which DD loves. In fact, the ballet teacher even gave them 5 minutes of free time and each girl got a hand-stamp. I felt like I'd stepped onto another planet. This would never have happened at the old gym. My four-year-old son did not get "free time" in his rec classes.

Spoke to coach after the first practice and she said DD did great, made all requested corrections and was actually a bit ahead of the group. This will hopefully be good for her self-esteem. Coach guessed what gym we were out of and who my DD's coach was, and then told me that her younger sister had DD's former coach while at a different gym and had the same experiences. (Yikes). She switched gyms, also - and she'd been in optionals. She promised me no coach at this gym will tell my DD that "her cartwheels suck" (coaches words, not mine, but that IS a phrase that my DD had heard -apparently she was moving her head some on cartwheels).

Anyhow, it took me awhile to, but I sent an e-mail to the team director/coordinator at our former gym. I wanted some time to cool off, and I think I needed a few days to really come to terms with our decision to leave. I am going to miss so many of those families as well as the girls. In the e-mail, I was kind and calm but also honest. I wished the team well. She replied that she was going to "look into the structure of the Level 3 program." I really hope she does.

So today, after DD's 3rd practice, I signed the paperwork and handed over our life savings (kidding, though this gym IS much more expensive!). Briefly spoke with coach again today (she approached me) as DD has now re-developed her fear on handstand on the beam (she can do anything else on the beam, though, even the L4 dismount), which we just got over 2 months ago. Coach said that she is confident that my DD will get it back and she and my DD together set a goal to have it back by March. DD was relieved, and I was relieved that coach actually sat on the beam with my DD and talked about her fear. Coach said DD has really great form and that she's confident my DD will recover her handstand on the beam quickly and be ready to compete Level 4 in September. My brother has been planning to get her a beam for Christmas (he promised her one some time ago as a bribe), and I am hoping that this is coincidental/good luck and that by playing on it, she'll start to trust herself on it once again.

Next week the gym has a team Christmas party night. Instead of a "normal practice", the girls will get to play games, do an obstacle course, and exchange small gifts. Again, this is a wonderful, wonderful thing that has never happened at the "old gym".

DD is excited to go to practice again. It makes my heart smile.
 
So great to hear. Gymnastics should be FUN. My daughter is very serious about her gymnastics, but she really enjoys going to gym. They'll have jobs as adults; why make them have a job as a child.

dunno great job on your <3 symbol, but I think texting is NOT allowed. Better be careful the Bog doesn't give you an infraction!!!
 
I'm so glad to hear that you made a change and that your daughter is so happy again! You must also feel so much better now too, as all that was going on was probably weighing very heavily on you as well. Take care and happy holidays.
 
What a wonderful update! We took my daughter out of a gym because of a variety of issues 2 years ago and it was hard to leave our good friends. She is still BFFs with her BFF from there and we still see them at meets and hang out with them. It was tough at first, but I have never looked back and neither has my DD. So happy for you guys!!
 
So glad for you both it sounds like a good fit. You will see the extra driving is well worth the program. Don't worry about the fear thing either - remember these are all new coaches for your DD and she has to form a bond with them and get to trust them too. Having fears creep in when changing gyms I think is a normal thing.
 
It makes my heart smile too. I am a sucker for a happy ending.

Right on with the divorce analogy. Changing gyms is a painful way to achieve sanity.
 
So glad for you both it sounds like a good fit. You will see the extra driving is well worth the program. Don't worry about the fear thing either - remember these are all new coaches for your DD and she has to form a bond with them and get to trust them too. Having fears creep in when changing gyms I think is a normal thing.

So glad you moved her! and don't worry about the extra driving..I drive an average of 1000 miles a week for the gym commute so I totally get the driving thing...but make good use of her time in the car...she can eat dinner in the car on the way home and do homework ( I ride with all the lights on to facilitate this and often wonder what other drivers think as they pass by me but oh well..) . She will be so much better off at a place that believes in her.
 
Yay!!! Glad to hear it's working out well for her. :) My DD has the same issue with handstand on beam, we've been working on it for a few months now- with a finger spot she goes fully vertical- with no one there she barely gets both feet off the beam, lol. :) They'll get it in time. I'm sure your DD will get it back quickly since she's in a nurturing environment. :) Best of luck!!!
 
Thanks again, everyone. I really love the support here.

I had honestly forgotten how excited she used to get for gym! It's so cute to see her so excited. She hasn't been this way since pre-team started at the old gym. It is so much fun.

I've spoken to a couple of moms from the old gyms - I am hoping my DD can keep up those relationships, if possible. If not, I am sure she'll make new friends in due time. I am trying to remain positive about it, though!

The drive will be rough as it really won't pay for me to drive home while she practices at this point. So, I am a little sad that I'll miss my son those nights. But, I am looking on the positive side and telling myself I'll get a lot of studying/reading done! And I am sure that once in awhile I'll find something to do with him on that side of town during practice - I just need to get more familiar with that area.

Also, I will sign my son up for classes for the next session for one of the days, so I can still spend some time with him. HE was unhappy at the old gym, it wasn't enough fun for him. They had moved him up to developmental early as he was essentially kicked out of tiny tots (he'd reached the highest level and had pretty much outgrown it and was quite bored - he distracted the other kids some). At this gym they stay in co-ed kinderkids until first grade (except those put in pre-team), and it looks like those kids have a ton of fun! They are constantly stimulated with different things. It's age-appropriate, but fun. So, I am excited about that, too. He missed the fun of the tot classes, he said "Mom, I want to go back on the 'teeny tots team'. I just wanna jump in the pit, run on the beam, and jump on the trampoline!". Oh, to be four again!
 
I'm so happy to see this update, very excited for your DD!!!

We left our old gym about 7 1/2 months ago. We doubled our commute and now we drive on a toll road as well, but it was all worth it to have my DD happy again. My DD loves and lives for gymnastics, and having a group of nice friendly girls and strict but caring coaches has helped her in leaps and bounds. This past weekend, we traveled to our first meet and there was so much support and bonding, DD (and I) just ate it all up and had tons of fun!

As for the friends left behind, it will take some effort on your part since your DD is still young, but it is possible to maintain those friendships.
 
That's wonderful news for both your DD and you. Maybe not your checkbook though. So glad things are going well. Hope her new fear disapears quickly. Keep us posted on how things go
 
That is such great news. I had posted before that we had experienced something similar, and our new gym is amazing as well, that perfect balance between working the girls hard and keeping the FUN in it. I am so happy for you guys!
 
It sounds like the move is working well for her and it was just what she needed. :) She is excited again and that's what counts, especially at this age. Good luck to her!
 
Great news all around! (Except the driving and the $$). We also doubled our commute to switch gyms 6 months ago...and I have never been happier. I smile daily in the gym now, instead of getting frustrated and angry. I am almost used to the drive now...;)...almost.
 
Love, love, love to hear that your daughter is happy at gym again! I have a longer commute as well and spend the time at the gym. My new Kindle is my best friend!
 

New Posts

DON'T LURK... Join The Discussion!

Members see FEWER ads

Gymnaverse :: Recent Activity

College Gym News

New Posts

Back