Parents Watching practice- a no no?

[Lilou]

So, I've seen various comments on here about parents essentially saying Do not watch practice. Or others where parents say, I watched practice, but don't normally (like it's a bad thing).

Why is watching practice such a no-no?

Our gym has a very small watching area and many parents just sit in the lobby and watch the screens (there are a couple of cameras in the gym that then show on the screens in the lobby) or hang out chatting. I am there on one of the days my kids practice and I watch, then chit chat, then watch a bit, then do work or something else. Just chill. Is that perceived poorly do you think? I only ask because I'm getting the impression from this board that watching is a bad thing.

 

[skschlag]

So, imo, watching practice is not a bad thing. It is how you react to practice that matters. I drive my son an hour each way to practice. I try to keep busy, but honestly I end up sitting. I do not watch the whole time, but do see the occassional turn.

If you are just hanging out, relaxing, and see practice, no big deal in my opinion. HOwever, if you are studying every turn, and counting how often the coach talks to your kid, or how much attention another kid gets or who gets more turns, or who is goofing off, that gets bad. It becomes hard not to see the coach paying more attention to one kid over yours, or to see yours "goofing off" etc. and then you fixate.

So, watching isn't bad. Analyzing, and focusing on everything is. PLus, sometimes it is fun to see something in a meet that you have never seen before!!!!

 

[2G1B]

I agree with skschlag. For me, I watch sometimes. For one thing, I really enjoy watching my kids do the things that they love. I was thrilled to be there when DD got her first kip and see the excitement on her face. But, I also enjoy talking to the other parents. Often I'm in the gym during practice; but I don't actually see any of practice because I'm just chit chatting.

I think that in addition to what skschlag said, it is important that if you do watch practice that you don't then make the carride home miserable for your kid. With my kids I have learned that they DO want me to ask how practice was. On here the advice is often to not even talk about it on the ride home; but every kid is different. My kids seem to like for me to ask "How was practice today?" And I generally add in, "What was the best part?" Sometimes the best part was something cool that some other kid brought in their snack, sometimes it was working on a new skill. I just have to take their leads. Even if I watched that practice, I still ask the same thing usually because even if I saw them doing something, they might not want to talk about it. Though sometimes I do ask, "hey, I saw you working on that flippy thing in the back of the gym, what was that?" And then they get to roll their eyes at my lack of knowledge and teach me something.

A HUGE "no no" is talking to your kids while they are out there. Don't do that. Not to tell them to point their toes, not to tell them to pay attention, not for anything. That will get you invited to only do drop off and pick up.

 

[tuckfull]

I would love to be able to watch, but I really can't see very much the way my DD's gym is set up. If I do stay at all, its mostly to chat with other gym mom friends!

 

[Seeker]

I agree with everything @skschlag said as well, but I also think the desire to watch is directly correlated with your child's age and how long they've been in gymnastics. If your child is a 7yr old L3 and you want to watch a bit that is somewhat different than sitting in the lobby with your face pressed up against the glass when your child is a 15yr old L10. Context is important.

 

[profmom]

Yeah, the teenaged upper optional should only be watched if you have a major problem with low blood pressure. They're either irritating the crap out of you by "wasting time" chalking up and chattering endlessly with teammates or scaring the crap out of you with whatever they're trying to learn.

 

[skschlag]

Yeah, the teenaged upper optional should only be watched if you have a major problem with low blood pressure. They're either irritating the crap out of you by "wasting time" chalking up and chattering endlessly with teammates or scaring the crap out of you with whatever they're trying to learn.

LOL. I am there with my almost 15 yo almost L10. but watch very little....I am usually chit chatting, etc. But I occasionally get some funny video of fails.

 

[dbean]

Yeah, the teenaged upper optional should only be watched if you have a major problem with low blood pressure. They're either irritating the crap out of you by "wasting time" chalking up and chattering endlessly with teammates or scaring the crap out of you with whatever they're trying to learn.

My daughter is only 11 but OMG...yes [emoji817] times

 

[tomtnt]

Yeah, the teenaged upper optional should only be watched if you have a major problem with low blood pressure. They're either irritating the crap out of you by "wasting time" chalking up and chattering endlessly with teammates or scaring the crap out of you with whatever they're trying to learn.

lol - yes, I often wonder how much shorter gym would be if they removed the time spent chalking up, dragging mats around, setting up phones to record one another, etc. I bet that takes at least 1 hour of a 4 hour practice

 

[Deleted member 18037]

I would lose my mind, dealing with the CGMs. Whispering about who is doing what, side coaching their kids..............

Been at 2 gyms, both discouraged it, probably for the reason above.

I like to watch occasionally. My favorite time is summer when many of the families are on vacation. And I am the only parent there.

And I enjoy my time while she is at gym. Date with the husband. Exercise time for me. Meet up with friends. Shop in peace. Or pick up shifts at work to pay for gym.

 

[MuggleMom]

I think its good as long as it does stress you or your kid out. I had a gym mom friend and at first it was great we would sit and chat all was good. Then she started getting frustrated. Her kid might get in trouble or they weren't working on X skill they should be working on. All she did was complain and I could see how much everything was stressing her out. She should not have been coming to watch. She ended up pulling her daughter our of gym.

 

[pinklemonadeliz]

Yeah, the teenaged upper optional should only be watched if you have a major problem with low blood pressure. They're either irritating the crap out of you by "wasting time" chalking up and chattering endlessly with teammates or scaring the crap out of you with whatever they're trying to learn.

LOL!!!! YES!!! I don't watch often because it's a 4 hour workout, waaaaayyy too long to sit and deal with the stuff mentioned above PLUS she's starting to do things that, quite frankly, scare the bejeezus out of me so it's probably best for my cardiac health that I just not be there ;-)

 

[gymgal]

I used to love watching dd at practice. And watching the upper level girls too. I would only stay 15-20 minutes but it was enough to get an idea of what she was doing, whether there were any issues with a particular coach, etc. That ended around L8 when she began training the "scary skills". I prefer to let my heart keep ticking a little longer. Watching the routines at meets is enough for me. ;-)

In general, the more a parent watches, the more likely the parent will become involved - "so what happened with ___ today? Or why were you just standing around on the beam? You could have gotten 3 more turns in. " Also, some parents watch the coaches and "think" - that's not too hard. I can work with her at home on that. BTDT and dd rolled her eyes at me every time I did it in the lower levels. It is just better when you don't watch for hours on end.

 

[Lilou]

All good stuff. I just prefer to be there in case my kids need something or whatnot since they're both under 10. But that's only one day a week; the rest they fend for themselves. I would never yell out to "coach" my child on the floor and am appalled by parents actually doing that. Wow!

So, it's more like parents who stay and watch with an intent to interfere somehow with the coaching and/or kids I'm gathering that's more of a no-no. But if you set up shop to work on your computer, watch a little on the screens and chat with other parents about just life and stuff I think I'm in the clear. Thanks.

 

[Flyaway]

In general, the more a parent watches, the more likely the parent will become involved - "so what happened with ___ today? Or why were you just standing around on the beam? You could have gotten 3 more turns in. "

I KNOW I would have this tendency if I watched. So I regulate myself and don't watch. Also, watching practice is like watching paint dry, so...

 

[Torimom12]

My DD gym, team parents aren't allowed to stay and watch. It's the rule. That is fine with me, I don't feel like sitting there for 3-4 hrs a night!

 

[SMH]

At my daughter's gym they ask that we only watch on a certain day of the week, because rec classes are going on at the same time and viewing space is limited. On their long practice days, when it's just team, some parents come and watch and chat, it's quieter and relaxing. Some parents are nevertheless there all day every practice....

I have a chattery 7 yr old who still is learning self discipline and control in the gym- she's so good in school, and then she gets to gym and just loves it so much and everything is so exciting....so watching can drive me a little nuts when I want to yell 'pay attention'!

My son took a preschool rec class....there was a little girl who had a whole extended family come to watch.. and coach from the viewing room. It was kind of horrifying

 

[M2Abi]

I watched the most practice when my dd was on pre-team. As practices got longer, I just didn't have the time. Now DD has practice 15 hours a week and DS has practice 8 hours a week and I have no desire to watch gymnastics at all.

 

[Along4theRide]

I remember the first time a couple of years ago that I went to one of her meets without *ever* having seen her routines in practice. It was nice to go in and be surprised by her new skills! I tend to only stay at the gym on days when my son has practices nearby. Generally, I work on my computer while I'm there. Only an hour or so... A couple of days a week.

 

[skschlag]

I wish I had that option I do work out 3 days a week..so that is one hour. I go to the library. I go to the store.. But we are there 20 hours a week. So I take my computer, pop on my headphones, and catch up on shows, work, etc. It helps. I don't watch much. But if I keep going places, i spend too much money.....