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Nov 18, 2022
17
So my daughter is a level 3 gymnast at a top notch gym. She has been doing amazing at gymnastics and progressing well. She loves her gym and her teammates and has balanced out track and dance while doing gymnastics.

This past year we made her dance schedule while planning around gymnastics. Her coach and owner were aware and we confirmed with them so no scheduling conflicts. Well we are 1/2 thru the season and the gym wants to change the practice schedule to another day that she has dance.

I’m lost as she already trains less than her teammates so now it will be 1/2 what they train. The gym doesn’t want to budge even though they agreed to her doing this season of dance. (The dance is comp dance not rec dance) so they have requirements for attendance aswell as my kid loves both.

What would you guys do?
The gym is great otherwise, but I’m upset they didn’t keep their word. I’m also upset at the lack of willing to work with the situation when I have offered other practice times she can be available.
 

JPC13

Proud Parent
Mar 25, 2022
459
Maybe not a nice answer, but things change and unless you have a contract you don't have recourse. If I were a coach and I had the choice between doing the right thing for my family/business versus making sure that your kid could do dance... I wouldn't give that decision one second of thought. I also wouldn't be particularly inclined to schedule an entire team's activities around one team members constraints.

Obviously, it would have been better not to tell that it was fine and then go back on it.
 
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Nov 18, 2022
17
I will add that no one one the team wants the day change for numerous reasons, but my kid is the only kid in another activity per say. So your option would be leave the program?
 
Nov 18, 2022
17
Maybe not a nice answer, but things change and unless you have a contract you don't have recourse. If I were a coach and I had the choice between doing the right thing for my family/business versus making sure that your kid could do dance... I wouldn't give that decision one second of thought. I also wouldn't be particularly inclined to schedule an entire team's activities around one team members constraints.

Obviously, it would have been better not to tell that it was fine and then go back on it.
I will add that no one one the team wants the day change for numerous reasons, but my kid is the only kid in another activity per say. So your option would be leave the program?
 

NutterButter

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Proud Parent
Jan 24, 2013
900
I agree with @JPC13. I think it's ridiculous that the gym caters to your kids' schedule only. I also think you are reaching the point where you have to commit to one or the other - dance or gymnastics - as both have intense training demands. Or maybe consider a less competitive option for one or the other. Maybe Xcel would be a better fit.
 
Nov 18, 2022
17
I agree with @JPC13. I think it's ridiculous that the gym caters to your kids' schedule only. I also think you are reaching the point where you have to commit to one or the other - dance or gymnastics - as both have intense training demands. Or maybe consider a less competitive option for one or the other. Maybe Xcel would be a better fit.
Commit to one or the other at level 3? That seems extreme. But ok.
 

NutterButter

Gold Membership
Proud Parent
Jan 24, 2013
900
Commit to one or the other at level 3? That seems extreme. But ok.
I'm only saying that because you stated that now you are able to make only 1/2 of the practices. And I know how intense competitive dance and gymnastics are. Your kid's hours in gymnastics will only go up from here. So yeah, perhaps you will be better served by picking one or dropping to a less competitive option like Xcel. Also, you asked for advice, it's yours to take or leave but no need to get snippy with people who are saying what you don't want to hear.
 
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Nov 18, 2022
17
I'm only saying that because you stated that now you are able to make only 1/2 of the practices. And I know how intense competitive dance and gymnastics are. Your kid's hours in gymnastics will only go up from here. So yeah, perhaps you will be better served by picking one or dropping to a less competitive option like Xcel. Also, you asked for advice, it's yours to take or leave but no need to get snippy with people who are saying what you don't want to hear.
Definitely not snippy… just seems to be a concern overall in the board and groups about streamlining kids too young or too early to one sport. They were also aware that this was her only year of this type of dance before just doing classes before. I think it’s honestly the lack of transparency when all issues were discussed before hand. Some of the parents work on those off days, and planned it around of course the schedule we got at the beginning of the season.
 
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NutterButter

Gold Membership
Proud Parent
Jan 24, 2013
900
If this is her only year doing the comp dance, then I'd just take the 'L' so to speak and go with the flow assuming that you like the gym and are otherwise content there. Sounds like she's successful too so the short term reduction in training shouldn't have a long term impact. In my experience, gyms set the hours and families scramble to get their kids to practice (summer was always the struggle for me and so was the school year start time that required my DD to leave 15-20 min early from school most days for several years). It does suck though that they told you they could accommodate your kid and now are walking back from that!
 

gym_dad32608

Proud Parent
Aug 7, 2018
404
54
Just reduce hours at the gym. It seems like something that can be temporary and gives some time to work out and figure a better schedule. At l3 its trivial to miss some hours. Just keep what your are doing and enjoy the ride.
 
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Lurker

Proud Parent
Jan 22, 2022
31
41
Commit to one or the other at level 3? That seems extreme. But ok.
Apparently being a multi sport athlete is advantageous at a young age but then you are forced to specialize at such a young age ugh. I think you know your answer when it comes to the gym you are currently at. Other gyms may be more flexible allowing your kid to practice with a different group for one of the practices if conflicts arise but for this season you are probably stuck.
 
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Gymmomsarethebest

Proud Parent
Jan 17, 2021
22
36
Apparently being a multi sport athlete is advantageous at a young age but then you are forced to specialize at such a young age ugh. I think you know your answer when it comes to the gym you are currently at. Other gyms may be more flexible allowing your kid to practice with a different group for one of the practices if conflicts arise but for this season you are probably stuck.
Yes I think that’s my main thought, if this is the right place long term for us. I’m super big on my word so that’s striking a nerve, we also have a super flexible school schedule so I can make most things work, so maybe the environment of a gym wanting 17.5 hrs at level 3/4 5 days a week no other commitment, for my kiddo isn’t the right place. She will be at 10.5 with the change. I think it’s a lot bigger than the schedule change.
 
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Gymmomsarethebest

Proud Parent
Jan 17, 2021
22
36
Just reduce hours at the gym. It seems like something that can be temporary and gives some time to work out and figure a better schedule. At l3 its trivial to miss some hours. Just keep what your are doing and enjoy the ride.
Do you think she will fall behind with 10.5 vs. 14hrs and the others doing 17.5? It would be for 8 months during off season.
 

skschlag

Staff member
Gold Membership
Proud Parent
Jul 19, 2011
11,285
Region 9
It sounds like there's a lot going on. First, 17.5 hours is way too many at level 3/4. Second, setting a schedule for a time period and changing it is hard on lots of people. I am not a fan of businesses doing that.

Honestly, with the dance, and 10.5 hours, she may actually do better. More hours does not mean better, and the dance will help her a lot in gymnastics!
 

JPC13

Proud Parent
Mar 25, 2022
459
I will add that no one one the team wants the day change for numerous reasons, but my kid is the only kid in another activity per say. So your option would be leave the program?
If it's a legitimately good gym that produces high level athletes without abusive methods I can't image why you would choose to leave it over a temporary scheduling conflict with dance -- unless your daughter is an amazing dancer with aspirations of (and the skill for) traveling the world as a prima ballerina.
 

JPC13

Proud Parent
Mar 25, 2022
459
...a gym wanting 17.5 hrs at level 3/4 5 days a week...
The plot thickens. That's a gym that's far above norm as far as hours go - one would presume clearly a very serious gym. When you pick a gym like that a lot of stuff comes with it. Missing out on other similarly serious activities being one of those things.

If she were at a 3x3 hours a week gym, she could dance her heart out. At 5x per week. Probably not feasible.
 
Nov 18, 2022
17
If it's a legitimately good gym that produces high level athletes without abusive methods I can't image why you would choose to leave it over a temporary scheduling conflict with dance -- unless your daughter is an amazing dancer with aspirations of (and the skill for) traveling the world as a prima ballerina.
This and other things have have made me look at my personal philosophies and lifestyle that we want to incorporate, While there are no recent mainstream stories of any issues. I think overall philosophy and structure are important when looking long-term. She’s definitely a better gymnast than dancer, as dance is more of an outlet, but mental health is also important in the long term. There are many local gyms that produce high level gymnast in our area that just may be a better long term fit is all I’m thinking.