Parents Getting 4 year old to leave it in the Gym

[claudidoll]

My 4 year old will not leave gym in the gym.
She keeps trying to do trucks at home on the furniture,
at preschool in the gym, outside on the monkey bars.... Really everywhere she goes.

Right now it's not stuff that us really dangerous....except the one time she did a handstand on the couch and
decided to turn it into a backhand spring over it instead....

I love that she loves gym, but this has to stop.

I had her coach talk to her about leaving it in the gym

Right now she does a 1 hour rec class a week
I told her we can make it 2 classes if she promises to keep it in the gym


Do you guys think that will work? Any other ideas/suggestions from those
who have BTDT?

 

[Twosmiles]

BTDT .. still there at 6

I can definitely relate to where you are. In fact, last year we asked Santa to bring a tumbling mat because I was so tired of putting the cushions back on the couch after my girls played gymnastics. It was all safe stuff though (rolls, cartwheels, etc). It was all in good fun though so I rolled with it.

When DD was 5 though she tried to do a backbend on the concrete at school and missed with her hands and came down on her head. This is what really taught her to leave gym at the gym. We all saw it coming before it happened. I had forbidden the skill at home, her coach had talked to her, her teacher had talked to her, but she did it anyway. Thankfully she was ok and learned her lesson on something that didn't cause significant injury.

Both girls still want gym all the time though. Their program is mostly conditioning and mirrors quite a bit of what DH and I do when we work out. So, we play with them. We have them teach daddy how to do handstands, they show off their handstand pushups, we practice pullups together on our pullup bar, they utterly humiliate us in toes to bar contests and I have a little taped line in a safe spot in the house that they can practice their cartwheels.

We don't do this every day though, just when they ask, and we do it through play. I love that they love the fitness and conditioning aspects of gym as it will carry them well through life.

In terms of skills we allow at home they would be: basic rolls, cartwheels (in predefined space), handstands against the wall, splits, and headstands. Anything else would result in a consequence.

I think this gives us a balanced approach. At least its working for now

Have fun!

 

[txgymfan]

Good for you for recognizing the saftey of leaving gym at the gym. I love your idea of adding a second class. If your gym has an open gym, that could also be fun and used as a reward.

Since she clearly has lots of energy. Ask her coach for a list of easy, safe things she could do at home, like practicing her splits, handstands against the wall, walking on a tape beam on the floor ( make it 4 in wide), and easy fun conditioning. Put the list where she can see it. If she does any unapproved activities, give her " strikes" and make her stop immediatly. If she gets three strikes she has to miss a gym class.

I am not advocating any training at home, just a few ideas if she wants to do it.

Have fun with your bouncy daughter!

 

[wallflower]

The same way you keep a kid from coloring on the walls, sticking things in light sockets, running in front of moving cars, etc. you are the adult and you are in charge.

 

[claudidoll]

The same way you keep a kid from coloring on the walls, sticking things in light sockets, running in front of moving cars, etc. you are the adult and you are in charge.

oh wow....maybe I let them colour on the walls, it's easier to put in socket protectors than it is to remove all of the furniture from my house, and kids can understand the immediate danger of moving cars far more clearly than that of a forward roll... Yes I am the adult but I was looking for some advice from parents who've had a similar experience. I really don't want to give her 100 time outs in one day or take away her joy and if someone had a novel idea that they were willing to share maybe I'd give a shot.

 

[gymgal]

oh wow....maybe I let them colour on the walls, it's easier to put in socket protectors than it is to remove all of the furniture from my house, and kids can understand the immediate danger of moving cars far more clearly than that of a forward roll... Yes I am the adult but I was looking for some advice from parents who've had a similar experience. I really don't want to give her 100 time outs in one day or take away her joy and if someone had a novel idea that they were willing to share maybe I'd give a shot.

Wallflower was rather blunt about it but she was right. It is no different than other rules you have in the house. If they break them, they "pay the price". If she won't listen to the coaches and the parents, then she can't go to gym anymore. It's a safety issue. It's no different than holding a parent's hand in the parking lot if they can't control their running behavior. Make it plain that you have to be able to trust her to follow the rules as she begins to learn more dangerous skills. If she can't do that then you can't allow her to learn those skills. Trust me - if she really likes gymnastics and knows you are serious about pulling her out until she can follow the rules, she will stop gym at home.

 

[claudidoll]

The same way you keep a kid from coloring on the walls, sticking things in light sockets, running in front of moving cars, etc. you are the adult and you are in charge.

Wallflower was rather blunt about it but she was right. It is no different than other rules you have in the house. If they break them, they "pay the price". If she won't listen to the coaches and the parents, then she can't go to gym anymore. It's a safety issue. It's no different than holding a parent's hand in the parking lot if they can't control their running behavior. Make it plain that you have to be able to trust her to follow the rules as she begins to learn more dangerous skills. If she can't do that then you can't allow her to learn those skills. Trust me - if she really likes gymnastics and knows you are serious about pulling her out until she can follow the rules, she will stop gym at home.

that was a much nicer way to put it I understand what wallflower was trying to say but the way it was put that immedately got my back up.

I guess there probably is't a magic wand that I can wave to get her to stop but if anyone finds one send it my way

 

[txgymfan]

I was not advocating taking away her joy, just putting some limits on it. There are lots of things she can do to improve her gymnastics without risking injury. Another idea is to play fun games with her to increase her strength, like holding her legs and letting her be a "Wheelbarrow". Have contests to see who can stand on one foot longer. How many jumps can she do using a jump rope? You could even buy a pull up bar and have her try toe touches to the bar. Some of our menbers ( certainly not all) have bought their child a floor beam and the kids make up routines using dance moves like the big kids (just not the flips). You could put on music and just dance and she can practice high kicks and other dance type moves. I understand kids like to move, the trick is to get them to move within safe limits.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

bribery sounds okay in this instance. lol. you gotta love spunky 4 year olds. lol.

 

[gymmomof1]

bribery sounds okay in this instance. lol. you gotta love spunky 4 year olds. lol.

Since she enjoys it so much and if you can swing it I would add another class to give her an outlet for her. When my dd was little she would almost unconsciously flip/cartwheel/full turn etc. much to her brother and sisters dismay as one day she kicked yogaurt out of her brothers hands lol. Once they even bet her that she couldn't normally walk through the house and she was insitant that she could - she lost the bet 10 min into it when she got up to get a drink and did a lovely full turn lol.

 

[wallflower]

that was a much nicer way to put it I understand what wallflower was trying to say but the way it was put that immedately got my back up.

I guess there probably is't a magic wand that I can wave to get her to stop but if anyone finds one send it my way

Sorry to be so blunt. I sometimes, like that time, post from my phone and short and quick is the way I go when typing on a tiny keyboard. Rules are just rules is my point. It has nothing to do with joy or squashing theirs. My DD when she was young had a bar (she still has it, but is beyond the point of using it). The rule was always she is not allowed to get on it for any reason without me there. Not even just to hang from it. There were no exceptions.

 

[thefellowsmom]

If I had a nickle for every time I said "The furniture is not gym equipment" I would be a rich woman. My dd is now 8 and she still can't go five feet without doing a handstand. She walks all over the house on her hands, cartwheels as a form of forward motion and sleeps in her splits.

I gave up a long time ago on a lot of it. It just is who she is. I guess I could spend my entire day punishing her for what comes naturally to her, but for her sanity and mine, I let some of it go.

We have some very strict safety rules like absolutely no tumbling at all anywhere, but if she wants to do conditioning or splits or handstands or pull out her beam and work on cartwheels or pull out a mat and do press handstands or back extension rolls then I let her. Over the years we have had enough conversations about it that she is pretty clear on her limits.

She is working really hard right now on straight legs and tightness so has taken to standing in releve on the arm of the couch or using the couch cushions to do tight leg bouncy exercises (don't know what to call that).

She drives it and I set the boundaries. Early on when she was still learning what was ok and what was not, she wasn't allowed to do anything unless I was there and if she broke the rules I would give her something else to do like clean her room or do something to help me with her little brother. We just expanded from their. I found that if following the rules meant she could keep doing what she was doing and not following the rules meant she had to do something she didn't want to do that she found the boundaries pretty easy to stay within.

Good luck!

 

[Aussie_coach]

Why totally keep gymnastics in the gym? The idea of learning a skill is to be able to do a skill.

Kids who learn soccer can still kick a ball around in the backyard, kids who learn swimming can use their skills in the local pool, kids who learn a musical instrument can play a somg for the family. So why not a kid who learns gymnastics do handstands and cartwheels in the playground.

even kids who don't learn gymnastics do gymnastics everywhere. It is all a part of being a kid, they need to experiment with their bodies. If you go into a school playground you will see lots of kids just doing gymnastics in everything they can find.

Doing gymnastics won't stop them from doing it but hopefully make them safe.

Perhaps turn your attention to helping her put limits on it instead and learning what is and is not safe. Like making sure she is not near any furniture, not trying new skills her coach hasn't shown her, and understanding that just because she is doing it with a coaches help doesn't mean she can do it her self.

i would reccomended you try the 2 nd day a week. If she is trying back handsprings it seems she wants to push herself further than she will get in 1 day a week. This may help to keep her safe because her skill progression will better keep up with her.

 

[onebusymama]

Why totally keep gymnastics in the gym? The idea of learning a skill is to be able to do a skill.

Kids who learn soccer can still kick a ball around in the backyard, kids who learn swimming can use their skills in the local pool, kids who learn a musical instrument can play a somg for the family. So why not a kid who learns gymnastics do handstands and cartwheels in the playground.

even kids who don't learn gymnastics do gymnastics everywhere. It is all a part of being a kid, they need to experiment with their bodies. If you go into a school playground you will see lots of kids just doing gymnastics in everything they can find.

Doing gymnastics won't stop them from doing it but hopefully make them safe.)


I struggle with "keep gymnastics in the gym" and I often question why I keep reinforcing this with my daughter. I like what you said. I can definitly see why someone should NOT"coach" their kid at home (that horrific trampoline accident video... YIKES!) But it is impossible to keep my DD from doing cartwheels around the house (in and out). Definitly no jumping on furniture though. But I don't see the harm in here doing cartwheels in the yard or headstands in her room. I know when she learns more skills she'll do more than just cartwheels, but we will deal with that when the time comes. So I really don't see the harm in tumbling in the yard. But as always that is just my opinion

 

[Azgymmiemom]

I see the harm with tumbling in the yard. Cartwheels-okay, maybe you are safe with those. Two girls on our optionals team (who should know better) kept putting pics on facebook of all the cool "skills" they were doing while swimming and running around in the backyard. Stress fractures in feet from throwing back tucks barefoot on the hard ground. Mind you, these kids are perfectly capable of successfully doing these skills outside of the gym. Doesn't mean they should or that its a smart idea.

 

[claudidoll]

So we are going to try 2 classes a week starting the end of Janurary. The second class is going to be her bday gift along with a couple of new Leo's

that and trying to limit her in house stunts to things like holding her own body weight up on the trapeze bar on her playset, handstands against the wall, and walking along a tape line... And timeouts/ losing gym privileges if she try's the more dangerous stuff...

 

[onebusymama]

I see the harm with tumbling in the yard. Cartwheels-okay, maybe you are safe with those. Two girls on our optionals team (who should know better) kept putting pics on facebook of all the cool "skills" they were doing while swimming and running around in the backyard. Stress fractures in feet from throwing back tucks barefoot on the hard ground. Mind you, these kids are perfectly capable of successfully doing these skills outside of the gym. Doesn't mean they should or that its a smart idea.

That sounded dangerous IMO. But my DD is 5 & far from being an optional lvl gymnast. Cartwheels is about all she does. When she's older & if she is still doing gym, then she should be able to reason & understand the dangers of tumbling & back tucks in the yrd.

 

[mado4]

The same way you keep a kid from coloring on the walls, sticking things in light sockets, running in front of moving cars, etc. you are the adult and you are in charge.

haha this is a good one …

 

[BlairBob]

My dad's simple rules:

~ Don't break my stuff. Stereos, tv's, walls, etc...

~ Don't break yourself. It's expensive and a pain to deal with.

~ If you do dumb stuff and break stuff, you get in trouble.

It might be a good idea to set up a space for her where she can do gymnastics and neither break herself or the environment.

Come on, we all know the duration and likelihood of a 4yo remembering she cannot do this or that.

 

[guest301]

If you allow cartwheel in the house this is what you can do:
You can get duct tape different color then your carpet and make a long line of duct tape on it. This is your balance beam - cartwheel over it making sure your feet on the tape at all times great pre skill for beam