Parents A question for parents of optionals...

[duyetanh]

Do you still have a high percentage of CGMs in your child's group?
(For the record, my daughter's group of 10 is lovely, and the CGMs have definitely phased or mellowed out).
But I couldn't help wondering: At your gym do these parents mellow out once their kids hit optionals?

 

[Taurus]

Still working cumps here, but from what I've read, looks like they turn into PNIMs (pls no injury moms!)

 

[GymmieC]

CGM's reside in all levels...

 

[cbifoja]

The first CGM I ran into was DD's first year as an optional. But her kid flamed out and now it's just lovely. No drama, no competition, no one-up-manship. It's quite nice.

 

[duyetanh]

My old college roommate has a daughter who is in gym and a level 7....she says the group is full of CGMs, which is what got me wondering...

 

[MILgymFAM]

Yup.

 

[raenndrops]

Our parents are all pretty chill. The only time we ever had a "real" CGM, her daughter was only old L4 training L5. She had come from a "TOPS" gym (not that her daughter did TOPS, but they had it at the gym) ... Our gym didn't have enough equipment, or train enough hours... the coaches didn't spend enough time with her daughter so she could get her kip (she was in kip club: coach spots 10 kips... you go to one of the other bars and do 10 glides... then move to the next bar and attempt 10 kips on your own... then back to coach's bar... Repeat x2-4, depending on the day). She ended up quitting gym after 2 months in our gym (she had switched to our gym for less intensity because her old gym wasn't even going to let her try to move up - she was scheduled to repeat L4 because she didn't have the skills by May... and our gym gives them until September). Her daughter now does dance and her mom is a "Dance Mom" according to ppl I know who are at the same studio, lol.

 

[duyetanh]

Our parents are all pretty chill. The only time we ever had a "real" CGM, her daughter was only old L4 training L5. She had come from a "TOPS" gym (not that her daughter did TOPS, but they had it at the gym) ... Our gym didn't have enough equipment, or train enough hours... the coaches didn't spend enough time with her daughter so she could get her kip (she was in kip club: coach spots 10 kips... you go to one of the other bars and do 10 glides... then move to the next bar and attempt 10 kips on your own... then back to coach's bar... Repeat x2-4, depending on the day). She ended up quitting gym after 2 months in our gym (she had switched to our gym for less intensity because her old gym wasn't even going to let her try to move up - she was scheduled to repeat L4 because she didn't have the skills by May... and our gym gives them until September). Her daughter now does dance and her mom is a "Dance Mom" according to ppl I know who are at the same studio, lol.

That is a great story, thanks for sharing. Made me chuckle.

 

[flippin out]

I don't run into them as often, but they're around. They are much better at hiding it though. I'd say they claws come out and you see the true cgm when your kid is the same age (grad yr) and cgm sees your kid as a threat to their dd's acceptance on NCAA team

 

[duyetanh]

I don't run into them as often, but they're around. They are much better at hiding it though. I'd say they claws come out and you see the true cgm when your kid is the same age (grad yr) and cgm sees your kid as a threat to their dd's acceptance on NCAA team

That makes a lot of sense, actually. Ugh.

 

[raenndrops]

That is a great story, thanks for sharing. Made me chuckle.

I've been at the gym so long that i have a million ... it helps that I am friendly and there all the time

 

[Deleted member 14190]

CGP, usually weed the kids out for you... unfortunately..... But a few do trickle through.

 

[Faith]

I think sport parenting drives us crazy whatever level, we just get better at managing and hiding it. I have to say DH is starting to let his crazy out a bit now he sees how good she is and where she might go, where I'm a bit more chilled now she has her path, a fantastic coach, so I don't see the need to worry so much about what group/level/what she'll be chosen for. It's still not an easy life though and it has taken over our family .

With optional level kids anyway, they tend to be older, been in it a while, so the parents don't need to stick around and watch. It's the watching practice that drives the crazy. I can always tell the really CGM- they're the ones who still sit and watch their 15 year old through an entire 4 hour session.

 

[B.Gold]

I think sport parenting drives us crazy whatever level, we just get better at managing and hiding it.

Yup.... I was recently disillusioned by a mom who I thought was completely grounded that isn't. That's when I realized everyone has the potential for this nonsense, but some are just better at hiding it than others. In the past, I've pleaded with my DH to help me encourage my dd into a different sport because of the parental competition in gymnastics. He says it's pointless because the nuttiness is at all high levels of all sports. I wish it wasn't like that.

 

[ShesAMonkey]

I don't run into them as often, but they're around. They are much better at hiding it though. I'd say they claws come out and you see the true cgm when your kid is the same age (grad yr) and cgm sees your kid as a threat to their dd's acceptance on NCAA team

This. Yes.
I actually have not had too many run-ins with CGMs. This year, though, I have just encountered one from our gym. I had heard whispers about her but had never really had contact with her. Our DDs are now on the same level (due to my DD's injury and her repeating L8) and they are exactly the same age. I have this sinking feeling that this woman wishes ill on my DD. She's whacked, I tell you.
I'm learning coping mechanisms. I'm usually the type of person who gets along with everyone, so this is a challenge for me. I need to avoid, avoid, avoid at all costs--particularly at meets.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

I don't run into them as often, but they're around. They are much better at hiding it though. I'd say they claws come out and you see the true cgm when your kid is the same age (grad yr) and cgm sees your kid as a threat to their dd's acceptance on NCAA team

This.

I think people are who they are. A CGM will always be. The Question is does the child continue in gym or move somewhere else in which case they will be a c?m else where. Annoying another set of parents.

The borderline ones will mellow, especially if the CGMs are no longer around.

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I would say some CGP mellow out when they get more experienced, some don't. We definitely have them in the Optionals group as well, although most of them have weeded themselves away from our gym at this point..!

 

[rjb123]

I feel fortunate that our group of moms is truly wonderful. I think that it is directly a trickle down from the HC who is huge on support each other, be a team - cheer for each other etc.

 

[munchkin3]

Yes they are there. Be we really have a wonderful group of kids and parents and we can talk openly about it. The other day, a couple of parents were talking about expectations.....'I dont want to travel all the way to XYZ so my Suzie can bomb!'....another one said 'I expect all 9s'......imagine the added pressure to the kid!
So, I said that i didnt care what my kid got as long as she was happy with her performance. And that the only thing that really scares me is her getting hurt. I added that I hope she can make all her routines without falling, but i dont tell her that....
I got a few laughs, like 'really?'....yes, really.....after getting to L8 with Older gymmie, YES REALLY.....We are not going to fly to the meet because of my DD who has to compete WELL!! etc.....we are going because the team is going, and we are going to have fun as a family......Oh yeah, and we cant wait to cheer her on at the meet......
a few moms agreed with my perspective.....others did not, but we can still agree to disagree.

Never be afraid to try and help a fellow CGM parent improve their perspective. It only strengthens the team.

 

[munchkin3]

I would say some CGP mellow out when they get more experienced, some don't. We definitely have them in the Optionals group as well, although most of them have weeded themselves away from our gym at this point..!

The other day a L7 Dad was in full CGM mode.....literally criticizing his daughter while she was on water break.....I kept tell him, 'dont do it!' C'mon leave her be!!! No, Stop! (i was very nice about it ) He said he makes her practice at home....I also said he should not do that. That is a no no.....
He could not help himself... after she went back in Dad tells me her Mom wants her to quit......its no surprise. It must cause so much stress on the off hours....