I just dont get some people. So upset.

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Moderator/Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Aug 3, 2009
In The Boondocks
I have been rolling this around in my head since wednesday and I need to get it out..lol.

First a little bit of back story. My daughter is 5. She has been doing gymnastics since she was 2 1/2. Started in a mommy and me type class. At 3 she went to a class where she was out there with the class and coach, but no mommy. Not long after she turned 3 we moved states. She started a new gym and they "prescreened" her and put her in an elevated class for her age group. Sadly before she turned 4 we moved again, and she started at the gym she is at now. When we first went there, the first day she was there they pulled her aside and the HC spend the hour with her. Just talking to her, getting to know her and seeing what she could and couldnt do to see where to place her. The ended up putting her in a sorta pre team class. Where it was just 3 kids (including her) and they worked one on one prepping them to enter the L2 team. She spent about 9 to 10 months doing that. Then in June they moved her to the team. Okay all that said..lol

Wednesday, she was at practice, doing her "thang"..lol. And this lady, whos 5 yr old daughter was starting that day was just wrapping up with the prescreening with the HC. The HC told her that they were going to put her daughter on the pre team until this season was over then they would reasses and see if she is ready for team. The lady went nuts. Screaming and yelling. Saying they had just moved there from Illinois, and there she was already on the team, and what kind of place were they running? Now mind you she is in the gym where the girls are training. Then she singles out Kadee. Talking about why is she on the team. She cant do this or that. Naming big moves that is just unthinkable for a child her age to do. Karma (the HC) told her that no she couldnt do those moves. And at her age she shouldnt do those moves. That her body isnt mature enough to do those moves. And some of them just the act of doing or trying to do them could cause damage let alone a failed attempt at doing them. That they have a standard routine they do on all aparatis at her age, and that there is a reason for that. She said she wasnt going to risk a girls well being just so she could brag and say she has a 5 yr old that can do a standing back tuck on the beam (which is one of the MANY things the lady rattled off). The lady was in her face, screaming and yelling and pointing at Kadee the whole time.
Its bad enough that she did this but my poor little 5 yr old Kadee's mind formed this into being her fault. It was her fault that this crazy lady was screaming at Ms. Karma. She was crying..and Ms. Morgan (an 18 yr old gymnast who helps Ms. Karma with the teams) was holding Kadee and she took her and the other girls out of the gym. They went over to the gym where the cheerleaders train and she was telling Mr. Steve (the owner) what going on. He or Ms. Morgan must have called the cops because after about 15 mins they showed up and took her outside. I dont know what happened after that, i think they just had her escorted out because she was refusing to leave.
I dont know, I know im rattling again. But im just mind boggled over this. For one, dont throw a temper tantrum in the gym in front of everyone including your own child because they didnt think she was as ready for team as you did. And two dont point fingers at another child because they are on team. I will be the first to admit that Kadee isnt able to do all the things she needs to do to preform her routines, but she is learning, and shes doing a dang good job at it. She works hard and she LOVES Ms. Karma and Ms. Morgan. No matter what i say to her i cant get her to understand that it wasnt her fault that this lady was yelling at Ms. Karma, all she knows and all her 5 yr old mind can see is that the lady was pointing at her, and yelling at Ms. Karma. Ms. Karma and Ms. Morgan pulled her aside ( to the conssesion stand, and bought her some popcorn and gatorade..lol) and told her that it wasnt her fault, that she didnt do anything wrong. Kadee kept saying but she kept talking about me, and thats why she was yelling at you. She doesnt think im good enough. If i could do those things then she wouldnt be yelling at you. She was just unconsolable.
What do you say to a 5 yr old to make her understnd that she did nothing wrong? That this lady is just a nut job? I know there is drama in this sport, but really? My 5yr old has already experience a major dose of it.
They dont have gymnastics next week. They are taking a week off with the schools starting back up and all. Then they go back the following week. I just hope she is better by then, and seeing Ms. Karma doesnt get it all going again for her.
Im lost on this one i really am.
Sorry its so long, but i just needed to get it out. Thanks for listening


Moderator/Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Aug 3, 2009
In The Boondocks
They didnt move there for the gym. Even though i really love the gym i personaly think it and its staff are awsome, to the best of my knowledge its not known outside of our area. The higher levels have placed several times in state and regional comps, but people arent beating a path to the place..lol. I think they just relocated and thats the gym in the area.

And, no they didnt except her to the team. I believe they were probably banned from the gym. They had the police escort them out, and i dont know what happened from there.

It was crazy. Never seen anything like it.


I might tell my daughter that the lady was yelling about stuff that my daughter should be able to do as a member of a team. But this lady was nuts and thought my daughter should be able to do those things now instead of when she is supposed to. I would tell my daughter not to worry about the crazy lady and when the time comes my daughter will do all those things and a whole lot more. If the crazy lady knew about gymnastics then she wouldn't stand there yelling at a little kid to do things now that aren't supposed to be done until she is older. She's probably mad because her kid got hurt at doing stuff that she wasn't ready for. A hug and kiss and forget it.


Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Sep 25, 2007
I am sorry that your daughter had to be subjected to that. How sad. I feel so sorry for the daughter of that crazy lady. How embarrassing for her. :( If she will do that in public, imagine how she is at home.

I would try to talk to Kadee and just explain to her that sometimes, people just kind of lose it. That it wasn't anything to do with her, that she was just upset and she took it out on her and said things she shouldn't have. That it was wrong, but not in any way HER fault. I think that once she gets back in the gym, she will be okay. It was traumatic for her and she will have to work through it. Sorry you guys had to deal with this.

But so very sad. Seriously. The crazies are everywhere.


Proud Parent
Jul 14, 2010
New Zealand
What a terrible story, bad enough the coaches had that inflicted on them but to involve other children is really nasty. I would tell your DD that her coaches are the experts in gymnastics and that the crazy lady was completely wrong and didn't know what she was talking about. Tell her that of course she is good enough and her coaches know that. I guess to a child of 5 adults and particularly parents are authority figures who seem to know everything, I guess you need to explain that adults don't know everything and sometimes get things wrong. I hope there's no lasting damage and she's able to get back to normal soon.
Mar 5, 2008
North America
I am so sorry you and Kadee had to go through that :(. Sometimes people are just crazy. And the sad thing is that this crazy lady will probably do the same thing (if she hasn't before at other gyms) at the next gym she tries to go to. I think the police coming in and escorting her out was a good thing because now you don't have to worry about her ever coming back to the gym.

As for Kadee--kids are very resiliant. Just reassure her that the lady "was crazy" (I know--not the best thing for a 5 YO to learn but it is reality, sadly). Just tell her "See the police even had to come and take her away". Over time Kadee will realize that some people just lose it and they say things that aren't true.
Feb 26, 2007
Poor little one. I would tell Kadee that the lady really was crazy there for a a while. Tell her that the police came and took her away and that she will get the help she needs (extrapolating a bit, but it might help Kadee feel less afraid that crazy lady might return) Tell her that she won`t be at your gym again.

Jealousy is ugly and so is entitlement.

The good news is that the CL let all her ugly out and didn`t manage to get a place in the gym. Now that would have been horrific as she slowly would`ve come undone!


Proud Parent
Oct 23, 2009
NJ Region 7
Sounds like you have a wonderful gym with level headed coaches and older gymmies with good heads on their shoulders!!! They all handled the hostile situation beautifully! Let Kadee know how in control her coaches were and that they know it was not her fault. May be let the coaches know what is going through her little mind so they too can reinforce that it is not her fault and they have her back :)


Moderator/Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Aug 3, 2009
In The Boondocks
Thank you everyone. I have talked to her, and explained that she isnt supposed to know how to do those things the lady was saying. That she didnt know any better. That she is only supposed to try and do the things that Ms. Karma and Ms. Morgan show her how to do. And to only do them when they are beside her until she gets it. And then that there are things that she should only do in the gym with the equipment they have. That even the big girls dont practice all their moves at home, that even they arent allowed to do certain things without the coach there.
I was just reinstating what they had pretty much said to her themselves when they pulled her aside after that all happened. At that point she just didnt believe it. She hasnt really said much about it since then. If she has let it go sorta-speak, i dont want to refresh it for her. But i dont want to ignore it either and make her feel like she has to deal with it alone. Maybe i could just say something flippant about it in passing and see what she says or how she acts when i do and see if this needs to be discussed more. I just dont want a melt down when she goes back to the gym.
Again ladies thank you, i normaly at least have ideas on how to handle things, but this one blew me away..lol


This is awful. Unfortunatly there are always those "stage/gym moms" but this lady is the extreme that's for sure!!!

Not sure if there really is anything you can say to your 5yo other than what you have said already. let her know this lady was crazy and let her know she was so crazy they had to call the police to get her to go home. Justs keep reminging her it's not her fault what choices adults make ever.

Most of all give her lots of hugs and kisses. At this age they usually don't let this type of thing bother them for too long. Time will heal all.

here's hoping that she won't be back!!


Proud Parent
Proud Parent
Jul 22, 2010
Tell her, if she brings it up again, that she should feel very sory for that lady... that just like people sometimes get sickness in their bodies, some people have sickness in their brains, and it makes them act in ways that they shouldn't. And I like the idea of telling her that the police came to make sure that the lady got the help that she needed. I think redirecting her energy from being afraid of the woman (hell, I would be too!) to feeling sorry for her might help. Poor kid...

There's a history of suicide on my husband's side of the family, so I've had to have this discussion with my girls more than once (because they want to bring it up and rehash it and be reassured) about people getting sick in their minds just like in their bodies. It seems to be something they can (at least start to) grasp.

gym law mom

Proud Parent
Dec 23, 2006
I think what you've already said to your dd is very good and I wouldn't bring it up again unless she says something. 5 yos really live "in the moment" and that moment may have passed for her and she's on to other experiences. It is very sad indeed that she and the other girls had to be a part of this uncalled for outburst by a parent. All you can do is tell her that her coaches won't let this lady back in the gym.

I would commend your coaching staff. Sounds like they were being as professional as possible and also protecting the kids especially your dd who I'm sure was singled out because she more or less looked young(same age as crazy mom's dd). Excellent idea to get them out of the gym and to call the police.

I do feel very bad for this lady's dd. I'm sure this is not the 1st time mom has gone off on some coach or staff member when dd wasn't put in what mom felt was the appropriate class or team. Can you imagine how scared this little one was to see the police come and basically walk them away? Calling this women Drama Mama doesn't even come close.

Give your dd an extra hug and give yourself one too.


Proud Parent
Mar 12, 2010
I just had to say something!! Poor kid!! and poor you!! and mostly, poor dd of the crazy lady!! I can just imaging the awful things she says to her own dd at home if she can act like that in public!!

Sounds like your coaches handled it as well as they could have. I hope your dd saw the police escorting her away, that may help reaffirm that it was the CRAZY LADy with the problem and not her!!

I'll bet your dd is just fine from this...kids are amazingly resilient, but still, I wish she never had to see this in the first place!

Big hugs to her and you, and I'm betting you never have to see the crazy mom again at your gym!!!


Moderator/Proud Parent
Aug 25, 2007
North Carolina
WOW !!! that just boggles my mind. It is just gymnastics. People need to get a grip.

I am SO very sorry that you and especially your child had to endure that. I would let it go. If it is on her mind, she will bring it up.

Kudo's to whomever called the police. I cannot fathom getting so worked up over my DD not being on team yet (not like they said "no, never") that someone would need to call the cops on me !!!
Sep 19, 2008
Oh my, I cringed for you reading this! Sadly, you are not alone :( The crazies who draw children in are everywhere, it's happened to me once too. Bog knows about it but I never made a thread here because rage would have made it moderator bait lol!

I think you and your gym were very classy about it. Smallest reaction possible I think in that situation, be proud! As far as explaining it to your daughter, I would just reinforce that it isn't about her. Adults get emotional and angry about things that kids don't understand sometimes. Just like kids let it out on the wrong target or the wrong way at times, so do adults. I would put emphasis on the way the people who handled it well acted. Let her know that she's not responsible for a random lady's issues. Had any other gymnast been within pointing range at the time it would've been them and not her that got the angry example honor. Wrong place, wrong time, adult acting a fool. I would try and turn it into a lesson about what happens when your emotions get the better of you and what a better choice for that woman would have been.


Not much that I can add to all the great advice that you've been given. I think both her coaches and you have handled this as best as can be. I'm glad that your coaches realized that this would be an issue of distress for kadee and took the time to try their best to put her mind at ease and reassure her. I feel so sorry for that "lady's" daughter. She must be going through what has to be a Rough childhood! I feel so sorry for her!


Poor Kaydee! If she's on team, that means she can do exactly what her coaches want her to be able to do.

Sounds like that woman (I won't call her 'crazy' because I have mentally ill family members who'd be insulted by the association) is letting her uncomfortable emotions get so big that she can't keep them with her where they belong. If a 5 year old asked me why an adult did something so out of control, that's what I'd tell them.

Pickle's Mom

I don't have much to add to the excellent advice you've already received. There are insane people in this world; people who have no idea of boundaries and who truely believe the world is out to get them. This was an unfortunate introduction for your daughter to this topic, but the truth is, she is going to have to deal with people like this again.

To me, the teachable moment here was that the staff tried the best they could to quiet her and then called for the police when the couldn't. Your daughter now knows that this is what you should do.

I remember when Pickle was in the pre-school program seeing parents get furious because of their child's placement. Nothing to the extent that you described, but enough to feel really, really sorry for the coaches and owner.
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