Parents 7 year old--make them do other sports/activities too?

[sjm2b3]

I would love your opinions. I have a 7 year old son who is competing level 5 this year. He is in first grade. Last year he played t-ball and hated every minute of it. He would usually cry on the way to practice and I would pump him up. His dad helped coach which he enjoyed, but he still just didn't like playing. We just received the paperwork about baseball for the spring/summer, and I asked him if he would like to try it. He immediately said no, then said well, I will do it if you think Dad really wants me to do it. (He is right, his dad would LOVE for him to play baseball instead of gymnastics). He went on to explain that he would agree to play soccer one more year and swim (in the summer), but really what he wants to do is gymnastics.

I am torn on this, as he is only 7. Should I be encouraging doing baseball one more year....I know that kids really learn sports at early ages, and what if he changes his mind in a few years and it's too late. Is 7 too young to decide on your own? He's in the gym right now 6 hours a week, so he does have time to do other things and we keep our weekends pretty free so he has lots of free time. I hate to think that he is dedicating himself so much so early to one sport. Thoughts?

 

[thefellowsmom]

I can relate to this a bit. My dd has been all about gymnastics since she was about three years old. I have taken her to every different sport, camps, activities to give her options and exposure and she had fun, but always asked when she could have more time in the gym. At some point, I just let her be because it isn't worth making them do some activity that they don't want to do. I hate seeing those parents that bring their kids to practice crying and not wanting to go. I don't want her to feel that way. And if gymnastics is what she is passionate about, then we will support that.

I would keep offering other options to him, but MHO is not to push another sport too hard or you may close him off to it for good.

But, the good news is that gymnastics is an awesome foundation for all sports. It is true that sports start so early these days, but even if he quits in a few years, he will be stronger and have more body awareness that any of those kids who have only been playing soccer or baseball. Then it is just skills and those should come faster for him as he is used to pushing his body and teaching it to do new, challenging things.

I am sure that you will make the best decision for him and your family. The fact that you are thinking of his well being in this way already makes you a great parent. Good luck with your decision.

 

[gymgal]

My dd had decided by 6 yrs old. We could have pushed her but why waste the money? Swim is different as it is a safety issue but why push a child to play a sport he's not interested in? Personally, I think kids know early on what their passion is if they are exposed to it. If they dont like it at 6 or 7 they aren't going to like it at 10 - in general.

Turn this around - if he was head over heels about baseball and didn't want to attend rec gymnastics any more, would you be asking this question? I'm guessing "no" and it has to do with the fact that gymnastics is not a mainstream sport especially for boys and especially in middle/high school.

One more thought... Dd's coach always says that middle/high school coaches are always trying to poach gymnasts, even when they have no experience in the sport because they are in such great condition and disciplined. The sport can be taught to an older child easily if he/she has the foundation skills of drive, motivation, and strength.

 

[MyBoysFlip]

We are in the exact same situation right now! Baseball registration starts in a few weeks & my 7Yo Level 5 son is also insisting he does not want to play this year. He played on his brothers 7/8 team last year as a 6YO & I thought had fun. Its seems he's afraid he will miss too many practices (he won't) and he didn't like being with a bunch of kids who "won't listen or do anything right". So we are at the same place as you - Dad says sign him up & make him go - I'm leaning towards letting him not play. I think its hard for our serious little gymnasts to step into a rec team set up with parent coaches and based on last year some not so focused athletes. And that was before he had done a full year on gymnastics team. I'm not agreeing with his wishes to do nothing but gym -I still want him to do other sports ( he wrestles & will go to clinics this summer & swimming lessons) but I just don't think every little boys needs to play baseball in the summer. I gave in last summer & signed him up late after realizing we could make it work & because I was tired of explaining to everyone why he wasn't playing. I hope this helped!

 

[sjm2b3]

Thanks.....glad to hear I am not the only one in this type of situation. I think my husband and I need to get it out of our heads that "every little boy needs to play baseball"..... I think we'll strongly encourage playing soccer so that he isn't just doing gymnastics over the spring and summer. He will definitely do swimming lessons, and he loves to do that. I appreciate the feedback. He's been passionate about gymnastics since he first started rec classes.

 

[bogwoppit]

I wouldn't force a kid to do anything, except learn to swim. I did that to my son and he didn't like it, but it was essential for our life near the lake. All three learned to ski and skate as well, living in a freezer makes that essential too. But baseball is far from essential.

It is never too late to go back to a sport, assuming you only put your kids in sport for their fitness and enjoyment.

I always let mine choose activities that they enjoyed, then I never have to nag them to go or work hard.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

yes. something else along with gymnastics. even if it's violin. or tennis. etc;

 

[lhmom]

I also think that there are kids who are not cut out for team sports, my son (not a gymmie) being one of them. We found that he is better suited to individual sports like golf and cross country. Like others have said, I'd make sure to offer other options but not make him play.

 

[Panda-girl's Mom]

I would only encourage him if he wanted to do other things. My daughter was the same way I exposed her to other things but she only really wanted to do gymnastics. Four years later she was done with gymnastics and is now doing other things. I would not worry about him not being able to do othe stuff if he changes his mind later on. In comparing my 2 kids my daughter who did gymnastics has surpassed her sister who did other stuff all along. Gymnastics gives them a great foundation for other sports I do not think any of the girls who have left the gym and had trouble transiting to something else. If gymnastics is his passion now let him enjoy it and have fun. It is when they start asking to do other things that it time to worry about if they need other activites IMHO

 

[JessLW]

I'm saying this gently, but based on what you said about how your husband would rather he did baseball, and the idea that "every little boy should play baseball," I think I would be careful with the idea that boys have to do "boy sports" like baseball or football. It is great that your son is into gymnastics and if he sticks with it as he gets older I'm sure he'll start catching enough flack about it, so I think it is important that you guys, now, when he's young, encourage him to do what he's interested in, regardless of whether it is baseball or gymnastics or ballet, so that he knows he has your support. It will be that much harder to stick with gymnastics when he's 14 if he feels like deep down dad would really rather he was on the football team. He needs to know dad will be just as proud of him if he makes it to level 10 (or whatever level he makes it to) as he would have been had he made the varsity baseball team. Kids can pick up on our attitudes even when we don't realize we're projecting them, and it sounds like your son is already feeling a bit of pressure to make dad proud and play baseball.

It is great to encourage our children to be well-rounded and at 7 I think a second activity is a good idea, but your son just might not be cut out for the ball sports and if he doesn't like them, I wouldn't push it. He's getting physical activity with gymnastics, so perhaps he could try art or music or a second language. Let him come up with the activity so that he'll be an enthusiastic participant. :thumbsup:

 

[Kiwi]

He immediately said no, then said well, I will do it if you think Dad really wants me to do it. (He is right, his dad would LOVE for him to play baseball instead of gymnastics).

This is the bit that concerns me. It sounds like he would only be doing it to win approval from dad.

 

[mumoftwogymnasts]

DD decided at 6 years of age that the only sport she wanted to do was gymastics. I offered others and continue to offer other things, but for her it has always just been gymnastics. She also has singing lessons, is in the choir at school and chose to take dance/zumba one lunchtime at school.

DS tried other sports. He played football(Australian rules)for two years before asking to switch to soccer. He then admitted to me that he only played the second year "because dad wanted me to". He was on the swim team for about a year before choosing to focus on gymnastics, he played water polo for several years. He still manages to fit in soccer in winter, but I can see the time coming when the gym hours will increase to the point that he will have to choose between soccer and gymnastics. My guess is that he would choose gymnastics...but you just never know.

Both my kids are exposed to other sports at school and I am amazed at how the skills, strength and fitness they have obtained from gymnastics help them be competent in these other sports. Both my kids made their school swimming, athletics and cross country teams... neither of them had done any training or practice in these sports. The gymnasts at their school excel at the strength and flexibility testing they do each term. Seeing this helped me to stop worrying about them "specialising" in a sport so young, I can see they have a strong foundation of fitness, strength and coordination that they can use in other sports later if that is what they choose to do.

With both my kids I insisted on swimming lessons until they were competent swimmers as DH and I felt this was a safety issue. DS enjoyed swimming, DD not so much. There were quite a few days when she cried on the way there, but we talked about why swimming was important and hung in there till she could swim well.
Would I have insisted she or DS continue in any other activity other than swimming if they were crying and obviously hating it - definitely not. With team sports I always tell my kids that if they have made the comittment to the team then they have to see out the season, but I wouldn't insist that they continue after that.

 

[jen1957]

My DD did both rec. gymnastics and soccer for 3 years. Just before she turned 8 (she's 9 now), it came time for fall soccer sign-ups and she told us that she didn't want to play anymore and that she only wanted to do gymnastics. I must have asked her 50 times if she was sure she didn't want to play anymore, but her answer was always the same so we let her quit soccer. It was shortly after that when she started asking questions about how she could get on team at gym so she could compete. We've always encouraged her to try different kinds of activities, but it seems gymnastics is her thing and she's pretty determined when she makes up her mind about something.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

This is the bit that concerns me. It sounds like he would only be doing it to win approval from dad.

sounds that way to me also. tell dad to go join an adult league.

 

[cher062]

Always encourage other interests but from what you posted Dad has the basebal dream and your son really would rather not do that. There are lots of things out there. May be karate, Scouts, music, tennis. Make suggestions of what you really think your son might be interested in not what dad would like your son to be interested in. I have found its hard for dads to accept their son in gymnastics - many don't see it as a "manly" sport - that is until their son gets to the upper levels and they see how hard these boys work out the bodies they develop.

Keep it all about your son! Let your son be your guide as to what other activities he might want to try. My son did gymnastics from 3yo until he was 16 and became injured and had to stop competing at almost 20 yo now he has been coaching since his injury and still loves being involved. His "other interest" was Scouts he made it through all the ranks and I can proudly say I am the mom of an outstanding Eagle Scout. One of the other sports he liked was swimming, climbing (there are indoor climbing areas near us) and whitewater rafting. Don't for get camping all year round.

 

[my4buffaloes]

I would encourage him to try different things, but if he hated baseball then not that again. I think they should have the experience of trying other things early on so that they can compare gymnastics with the other sports. They then have the option of picking which one they want and for most of these kids they chose gymnastics and it really is their choice then. As they get older there is not time to do other things so do them now while you can.

LOL I remember when dd started really getting into gymnastics and we were shocked at the cost and scared of injury, etc. I desperately tried to get her to take horse back riding lessons and give up gym. I can't believe I ever did that because it isn't like that was really safer or less money (she loved horses at the time). she did one session of soccer when she was 6 and really liked it, but went straight back to gymnastics. she is doing violin now through school and wants to try tennis. I think this summer I will sign her up for tennis lessons so she can try it at least, but I am pretty sure she is a gymnast for life at this point. I have come to accept it. You will too.

 

[sjm2b3]

Thanks again everyone. We will not be making him play baseball. We will definitely still be swimming this summer and I will let him choose between soccer and tennis. My husband does seem more interested/supportive of his gymnastics after watching him compete in the first meet of the year. We went to our first college level meet to watch last weekend and he thought it was pretty cool (my husband that is....of course my son loved it and thinks he is going to the olympics as are all 7 year olds right! .

 

[Esoteric]

I would never force a child to do any specific sport or activity that they didn't want to, but I do have a rule that they HAVE to participate in 3 different types of activities: Athletic, Creative & Service. The athletic has always been their choice. My oldest went from dance to gymnastics to roller derby. My youngest dance to gymnastics. The creative can be anything musical, artistic or dramatic. My oldest has always been involved in drama productions and improv clubs. My little one like traditional artsy stuff and takes a weekly painting class at the community center. The service really comes into play around age 10 or so, when the children can volunteer. My oldest did work at an Alzheimer's unit but it was too much, so she feeds the homeless every Monday now. My little one is still a bit young at age 8, but she has helped me to walk shelter animals and we often assemble brown bag lunches in our kitchen to distribute to the local homeless.
I don't care what they choose to do, but they have to choose something from each area, along with their academics, to become a well rounded adult, imo.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Thanks again everyone. We will not be making him play baseball. We will definitely still be swimming this summer and I will let him choose between soccer and tennis. My husband does seem more interested/supportive of his gymnastics after watching him compete in the first meet of the year. We went to our first college level meet to watch last weekend and he thought it was pretty cool (my husband that is....of course my son loved it and thinks he is going to the olympics as are all 7 year olds right! .

livin the dream baby! that's what it's all about.

 

[mommy_of_three]

We're running into this issue with DD (5). She did soccer last fall, and when we talked about signing up for spring, or maybe doing dance, she said no. DH suggested t-ball, and she doesn't want to do that, either. 'Just gymnastics!' Okay then. I am going to look at some art classes through community ed, since she loves to draw, but other than that...what can you do?