Parents ...and now...i'm almost speechless. thoughts?

[MdGymMom01]

I agree with Geoffrey. Maybe you are reading into what they said to you at that time a little too much. I would have another conversation with the owners/coaches and tell them that you want to stay because she is having fun and you are not looking for anything serious in regards to training for the next year or two...see what they say to that.

It just seems wierd that in this economy, gym owners would actually be pushing away willing and able PAYING customers!!!!!

 

[ellabella]

I think it makes sense that if they thought your DD wants to do USAG that they would tell you they aren't the gym for you. It sounds like they don't plan on ever competing USAG again.

 

[Aussie_coach]

It may sound crazy but 5 is the appropriate age to choose the next olypians. I know it is done differently in the USA but in most other countries in the world the olympic team are selected at 5 or 6 years of age. The sort of training that is needed to get them there has to start very early.

Here in Australia gyms identify elite gymnasts at 4 or 5 years of age. They usually go to train in specialist developmental programs even at this young age to get them ready to train at the elite level. Some even go on to attend specialist academies of sport at this age. By 6 they are training and competing in specialist programs and competitions.

In fact the way the program is set up now they MUST be training in a specialist elite gym and competing in international levels by the age of 10 at the absolute latest or they will not even be considered for international competition. To get to this level by age 10 they pretty much have to be identified by 5.

I know you have said you aren't interested in going down that road, and thats fair enough, it is an incredible committment. I am just posting this so you understand why they are being pushy with her at such a young age. because by the time she is 7 if she haasn't been taught correctly early on, her chances for reaching the top level will be pretty much gone.

It is fair enough that you have chosen to not let gymnastics rule your life, and up end your family and move close to a great gym, for a 5 year old who may not even want to do gymnastics in 11 years when she is old enough to compete internationally. But the coaches at your gym may also be concerned that she will get bored soon with what they have to offer. That she will outgrow their programs in a short period of time and stop enjoying the sport because it no longer offers her any challenge.

 

[jls1969]

I have a bit of a different approach than AC---while I always respect and value what he says. My dd has always looked like a gymnast. Even at 3 she had muscles and people would ask how she got them. She has very low body fat, is strong as anything and flexible too. That being said---she started in a preschool program and we followed it up through pre-team. When she was 7--she competed a L4 season, at 8 L5 and then repeated L5 at the age of 9. Now she is 11--finished with L7, working on L8,9 and 10 skills and her coach talks about elite plans for her. We have only been at this competitive gym for 2 years---she did 1 season of L5, L6 and 1 meet of L7 to get the qualifying score at this gym. We also have several elites at our our gym as will. Who knows if the elite path will happen for my dd---he is very careful to say things can go differently at any time, but she is talented, has the right coaching staff and the right physique as of now. She doesn't qualify to compete internationally as an elite for a couple of years...and doesn't qualify to the Olympics until 2016. I do think there is time---it is important for little girls to take it slow, because once she makes to commitment to take it on, there is hardly time for anything else. My dd has changed schools and trains 36 hours a week--all because this is what she wants to do. She is 11, has some idea of what she is missing out on and still made the decision----and we support it. At 5, it is hard to know if this is really what your dd wants to do for the next 13 years. My opinion is---if she is happy really keep that in mind. If you choose to not move right now---she will still be talented in a couple of years and then you can make a more serious evaluation then. This is just my opinion, I don't mean it to offend...

 

[ZJsMom]

We could debate the merits of the Australian system vs the US, and certainly there is much to be said for early identification and training. BUT I don't agree with this:

because by the time she is 7 if she haasn't been taught correctly early on, her chances for reaching the top level will be pretty much gone.

Alicia Sacramone didn't start gymnastics until she was 8. There's a girl who qualified elite last year and made it to Nationals who didn't start competitive gymnastics until she was 10. She may never make an Olympic team, but she's made it to the highest level and will get a good college scholarship out of it. I really don't buy that intensive training at the age of 5 is a prerequisite for future gymnastics success.

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

Alicia Sacramone didn't start gymnastics until she was 8. There's a girl who qualified elite last year and made it to Nationals who didn't start competitive gymnastics until she was 10. She may never make an Olympic team, but she's made it to the highest level and will get a good college scholarship out of it. I really don't buy that intensive training at the age of 5 is a prerequisite for future gymnastics success.

Concurred. Early talent identification/training is overrated.

 

[sheplaysinthechalk]

hhmmm...

Okay. After a discussion with some of the gym staff:

This whole thing is that they feel like dd would be able to go further in the sport (and much more quickly) if training elsewhere. He explained to me that they wanted to let me know that they would be fully supportive in helping us transition to another gym *if* we decided to pursue training to higher levels. They wanted to let me know that they feel that she is very capable of being really great at gymnastics (with the right coaches and a gym that's a good fit). They just wanted to let me know now, so that we could weigh options if we wanted - or keep our eyes open for an opportunity. They also said that they would be very sorry to see us leave, but want to make sure that (for dd's best interest) all of this was out in the open. HC just wants her to be happy - and doesn't want her to miss out on the opportunity to be great if she doesn't have to.


I think it's completely wonderful and a total blessing that they care so much about her.

I also want what's best for her. But now, I'm sort of questioning WHAT is best for her as far as gym. I don't know if it's best to just stay and do what she can where we are...or if it's best to give something else a try...or if it's best to just sit on it for a while and see where we are in a few years...I had never given this any thought before. But, having read all of the previous post, some are giving the impression that waiting isn't the best thing...and neither is jumping the gun...I think it would be amazing for her to be able to do this - but if there's a way, right now I don't know what it is (since we live in the middle of east-flippin-nowhere).

I guess I have a lot to think about...I know that I don't have to make a decision today or in the very near future, but a decision will have to be made at somepoint, whether we make no changes or try something different....honestly, I just want to do what's best for her. And I thought that we were doing what was best, because she loves it...But now I'm thinking, what if she would love it even more??? I feel smashed between a rock and a hard place - sort of.

And BLESS those of you making it through this and responding and being supportive! It really does mean a lot!

 

[mbphoto]

We could debate the merits of the Australian system vs the US, and certainly there is much to be said for early identification and training. BUT I don't agree with this:


Alicia Sacramone didn't start gymnastics until she was 8. There's a girl who qualified elite last year and made it to Nationals who didn't start competitive gymnastics until she was 10. She may never make an Olympic team, but she's made it to the highest level and will get a good college scholarship out of it. I really don't buy that intensive training at the age of 5 is a prerequisite for future gymnastics success.

Totally agree. Plus at five, that's very young to be making life decisions. Especially if it involves others in the family.

 

[mariposa]

Wow. I missed a lot. Guess I should stop worrying about my own problems and hang out here more. LOL. Much more fun here.

As to your last post, it does sound like you are in a tough spot. If it were me, I would leave it where it is for now. She is young and I don't think that waiting a few years will hurt her. Enjoy not having to drive and maybe a move will eventually come about and you won't have to drive so far to find another gym, etc.

I can feel the pain of not knowing what to do. I am struggling with it right now as well. I don't think that the gym my DD is at is the BEST choice for her, but she is happy there and I am for the most part and it is easier to stay. I know she could do better if she was given the chance, but not sure I want to move her to another gym or not.

Hugs to you. I truly don't think that staying where she is for awhile will hurt her. If you had more gyms close to you, then moving wouldn't be a bad idea, but if you have to drive, I would wait.

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

I also want what's best for her. But now, I'm sort of questioning WHAT is best for her as far as gym. I don't know if it's best to just stay and do what she can where we are...or if it's best to give something else a try...or if it's best to just sit on it for a while and see where we are in a few years...I had never given this any thought before. But, having read all of the previous post, some are giving the impression that waiting isn't the best thing...and neither is jumping the gun...I think it would be amazing for her to be able to do this - but if there's a way, right now I don't know what it is (since we live in the middle of east-flippin-nowhere).

I guess I have a lot to think about...I know that I don't have to make a decision today or in the very near future, but a decision will have to be made at somepoint, whether we make no changes or try something different....honestly, I just want to do what's best for her. And I thought that we were doing what was best, because she loves it...But now I'm thinking, what if she would love it even more??? I feel smashed between a rock and a hard place - sort of.

I think if you're not sure, holding where you're at would be fine, as long as you and your daughter are both happy. If isn't broken, why try to fix it?

 

[MdGymMom01]

We could debate the merits of the Australian system vs the US, and certainly there is much to be said for early identification and training. BUT I don't agree with this:


Alicia Sacramone didn't start gymnastics until she was 8. There's a girl who qualified elite last year and made it to Nationals who didn't start competitive gymnastics until she was 10. She may never make an Olympic team, but she's made it to the highest level and will get a good college scholarship out of it. I really don't buy that intensive training at the age of 5 is a prerequisite for future gymnastics success.

I totally agree that starting young is NOT an indicator of future success. There is also a lot more than just physical body type that go into a confident successful gymnast. A lot has to do with work ethic, the kid's determination, and mental maturity and toughness.

 

[gymnomore]

I think you are right to be apprehensive about the situation. When I first read your post I was like oh yeah- I've seen that happen; when a child shows unusual potential and reaches a point that they cannot be trained at a gym anymore- they are sent to a bigger more accomodating gym with more qualified coaches. But then you said the key phrase: She is 5. In my opinion, no 5-year-old knows what she wants to do from one day to the next and cannot possibly make a decision about how she will commit to a sport such as this. And like someone else said- there are many talented 5-year olds out there. And as far as the Olympic potential idea: They shouldn't plant ideas in peoples' heads! That can only bring disappointment if it doesn't happen. Yeah, I think that is weird. If your dd is happy, then leave her where she is. Tell them you appreciate their votes of confidence but you want to continue with the present arrangement. If it aint broke, don't fix it.

 

[gymjourneymom]

You do have a big, decision to make for your DD & your family. I think the gym you are at is VERY honest & open. DD is talented, she's happy there & it is convienent for you. All very important pluses. Your DD is only 5yrs old...do you want to commit her to a "gymnastics life style"(possibly homeschooling, or moving your whole family to be closer to certain gym) at this point? I personally wouldn't, but I know someone who did & her DD is now on the TOPS National team. I personally think it's the mom's dream they are pursuing, not the child's, but that's another story. You have to seriously investigate your other options & weigh the +/-. I often wonder if I had chosen a different route for my DD, would she have learned the bigger skills before fear set in. But I know she has really enjoyed doing other activities, along with gymnastics. Your current gym sounds so helpful & honest...would they be willing to give her privates a few times a week to up train her? Then you could get an idea how your DD feels about more hours & more extensive training. Privates may be expensive....but it would be nothing compared to the cost of all that driving to another gym! Just an idea.

 

[TnTTaxi]

I tried to make the Olympics in an equestrian event. Lets just say I learned the hard way it was not my path.

Having said that my Dad once asked me if he should have DISCOURAGED and nit supported my dreams. I of course said NO! That path and those memories will be a part of my life forever. I would hate to hold my child back if there was a chance for that road.

On the other hand she is 5!! I was 18, I do not envy the decisions you are dealing with.

Just my 2 cents

 

[MdGymMom01]

I think the important thing to do right now is to see what kind of attitude the gym owners/coaches have with you now that they know you want to stay and not find another gym. If they are supportive of that and will offer privates for dd to uptrain so she is not bored then you know that they are sincere. If they do not work with you and continue to discourage staying, then there may be different motives behind what they are saying to you. Having a young kid in the gym that is talented only makes other kids more enthusiastic and want to do well also. It would only promote more business in the gym IMO.

What does your gut say? Do you think they are sincere and have her best interest at heart or are they trying to push you out of the gym "in a nice way"?? Not that they would be, just something to think about.

 

[sheplaysinthechalk]

I think the important thing to do right now is to see what kind of attitude the gym owners/coaches have with you now that they know you want to stay and not find another gym. If they are supportive of that and will offer privates for dd to uptrain so she is not bored then you know that they are sincere. If they do not work with you and continue to discourage staying, then there may be different motives behind what they are saying to you. Having a young kid in the gym that is talented only makes other kids more enthusiastic and want to do well also. It would only promote more business in the gym IMO.

What does your gut say? Do you think they are sincere and have her best interest at heart or are they trying to push you out of the gym "in a nice way"?? Not that they would be, just something to think about.

again, thank you ALL sooooo much for helping me here. I REALLY REALLY mean that.

Honestly, my heart tells me that they truly hold very high her best interest. I probably haven't given this impression, but I do have a pretty good relationship with the owner, and like I said we get together socially on occasion (and probably would more often if our schedules didn't conflict so often - and that's on my end of the schedule)...

I think I really took what they were saying the wrong way. The reason that I really go SO bent out of shape about it is that:

I know that my dd is very talented. and when they came to me with this, it freaked me out...dd is showing WAY more talent in gymnastics than I ever dreamed of. I had NO clue that she would ever be this good at it. From the time I started taking her to class she just keeps progressing and getting stronger and doing new things each week. Her gymnastics (form and technique) is even very polished for her age and considering the length of time that she's been training. I find it really amazing to watch her and it just makes my heart sing that she is growing in the gym - and all of her success in there so far. She is blessed with a gift - there is no doubt in my mind. I'm about to cry just thinking about her. She's such a great child and I'm glad she's mine! I know that all parents feel this way about their children...isn't it a great feeling though? tears....

the upset part for me comes with the fact that we live where we live and that if we lived somewhere else, she might be able to more with her gymnastics than she can here. And I'm feeling a little responsible...I probably shouldn't feel that way, but i do. I feel like i'm standing in the way of her being able to do what she's best at right now.

but with all of that said, i'm not going to do anything differently with her right now. Like a few of you said, "if it's not broken, why fix it?" I may let her do some private lessons - and I'm sure that the coach wouldn't mind the extra $ either! And I know that he would be happy to work with her - they've offered before, but i declined because i was occupied with ds and his extra curriculars...


we'll see what that does for her. she'll be excited, i know it!