Parents Conservative/cautious/opposite of daredevil

[2gymmies]

These words describe my daughter to a T! Anyone else have a gymmie like this, but somehow she gets the skills and when she gets them they are good! She is rarely the first in her group to get a new skill - thank goodness there is no sign on a gymnasts forehead saying I was the last to learn this!!!! Coaches, is this frustrating to you when a gymnast wants to do drills over and over and over and still says, are you sure I'm ready to do this? But then when they finally go for it, it is great! Be honest, would you rather have a gymnast that will just try a new skill and be a daredevil? Are there advantages to be cautious?

 

[Krystan]

That's my dd too! She is afraid to try new skills (even drills) until she's watched others do it a bunch of times. She does a lot of standing back and watching. Part of it, I think, is that she is a perfectionist and doesn't want to do it until she *knows* for sure she'll get it, or at least come close. Sometimes it drives me crazy because I will watch her avoid over and over a certain station that she is hesitant about. She is now realizing that certain skills (ex. kip) take hundreds of tries before you get them right, and you might as well start trying so you can get through it. I do think the observation-first method works pretty well for her. She watches and sees errors others make and adjusts in her head (she always does this, not just with gymnastics). By the time she gets it (sometimes the last one on the team), it is pretty close to perfect. Huge benefit of being cautious: MUCH less likely to have an injury due to trying something she's not ready for yet!

 

[CreateMagic]

. She is now realizing that certain skills (ex. kip) take hundreds of tries before you get them right, and you might as well start trying so you can get through it.

What a great attitude! Is she that way in everything she does? I can only imagine that will help her be a happy, successful person in the long run.

 

[2gymmies]

Krystan, My dd is training level 8 and is not exactly sit back and watch, but if they say do 8 into the pit and then 5 onto the resi - she'll do 20 into the pit (that are all good) and then ask, are you sure they are good enough for the resi? And the coaches will look at her like duh!!! My dd is a perfectionist like you said and she definitely doesn't want to do something that she thinks will look goofy or that she might be embarrassed about or heaven forbid might not make the first time she tries! At least they look good when they finally do it!

I just bite my lip and say, you can do it!

 

[thefellowsmom]

The fellows fits more into this side of things. She is not one to just huck out a new skill willy nilly. She likes to do things right and that just seems to take longer.

She didn't walk until 15 months, one of the reasons we got her started on mommy and me gymnastics classes, she just wouldn't even try. But then one day she let go of the table and walked across the room and she never stumbled or had that drunk sailor baby walk like her brother.

She is like this with gymnastics too. It takes her a while to get it and sometimes she is hesitant at first, but when she gets it, it looks great. One thing I have noticed is that she really likes rules and knowing how to do things correctly, so when her coach tells her she needs to do things a certain way or hold her body a certain way she practices it that way every time and won't "cheat" (her word, not mine) to muscle the skill out.

She is also very literal and her coach is kinda a jokester. He was laughing and telling me they were on bars one day and she did a pull over onto the bar and then jokingly he said "ok, cast to handstand" and she looked at him like he was crazy and then said "all right, are you going to spot me or what?". He said he has learned that he has to be careful how he words things with her.

She isn't afraid though so I think this helps. She is willing to try anything, as long as she feels safe and prepared. Her coach told me he knows she can handle anything he asks of her, she just may take a little longer to get there.

I think her coaches enjoy working with her and they seem pretty excited about her potential, but who knows what that means. I hope in the long run this will all help her to be a better gymnast. She understands now that getting new skills is hard and takes time and values good form and preciseness. Sometimes though, I wish she would throw caution to the wind and just go for it

I would also be interested in coaches perspectives on how gymnasts are mentally different and how that can help or hinder them.

 

[gymgal]

my dd is very cautious with backward skills. She was the last one on her team to get her robhs and her back tuck. She always wants a spot long after she needs one. but with forward skills she doesn't have the problem. there is definitely a bit of embarrassment as well - not wanting to perform it wrong. She's not a perfectionist. She just doesn't want to be laughed at (no one would but that's in her mind). They call "new skill" at her gym once they are able to do it several times in a row at practice. She almost never does this because she doesn't like to call attention to herself. I think her preference would be to not compete at all, if she could stay on team to continue her skills

 

[lilgymmie7]

My older DD was VERY cautious, so much so that she sometimes brought herself to tears. She worked through the tears and when she finally did the skill it was beautiful- almost perfect. She was always the last to get the skill taught. I can remember when she was getting ready to compete level 6. She got that darned fly away the week-end before her first meet-just in time!

Younger DD is NOT cautious at all. She just goes for it! She loves the thrill. She has to polish up her skills, but most times they start out pretty good.

Older DD took her time while younger DD doesn't. Both still stressed me out! What do the coaches think, however?

 

[jcs]

I think my DD is somewhere in between. She definitely likes to assess the situation before engaging...I've seen her stand back and then once she realize what the other girls are doing and she knows she either can or wants to try it she jumps right in. She is extremely competitive and wants to be the best at anything she does. But that sometimes holds her back if she realizes she isn't. Rather than being "ok", she just doesn't do it. Trying my best to have it sink in that she is just learning skills and she isn't expected to know everything. I almost think all of the reassurance "you're so good!" is hindering her because she looks at some of the older girls that obviously have more skills and she knows she isn't as "good" as them, even though she could be in a year or two if she sticks with it...hard for 4 year olds to see that progression. She only knows what she can do now.

 

[Kiwi]

Yes, my DD is very cautious. She has a hard time when learning new skills because she feels like a failure when she doesn't get it straight away. I think she also watches what the other girls are doing, and it bothers her when everyone else has a skill and she doesn't have it yet. I've had to talk to her a lot about how it is okay to make mistakes, and remind her to be patient and to keep chipping away at the skill and eventually it will come. She is definitely not fearless and won't try anything she doesn't feel able and ready to do.

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

I thought you were actually describing my DD when I read the title! Alex is very cautious and meticulous when learning new skills. She usually is afraid of a skill until she has done a trillion drills and knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is very little chance for failure! It takes her longer to get a skill but once she does there is not much correction that needs to be done!