Parents Daughter having a hard time with constructive feedback

[KMC mom]

Hi all,
My daughter is 7 and is three practices in on a level 2 compulsory team. She is having a hard time pushing herself outside her comfort zone and taking constructive feedback to make corrections. The coaches said she is a strong and skilled athlete but struggles with putting in effort to correct when needed. Tonight she ended up crying after a coach was trying to help her form on beam because she said it hurt when she did it (it was a simple standing on toes hoping-I’m not sure the skill since I’m new to all this). I know this is just helping her build her strength and skills , and the coaches are doing it in a compassionate encouraging way. What can I do to help her get outside her comfort zone to improve and get stronger? I’m at a loss because she loves gymnastics but I don’t know how to guide her to making improvements and taking the feedback to help her make adjustments when needed. Any advice is appreciated!

 

[Dahlialover]

Just because she loved recreational gymnastics, doesn’t not mean that she is going to love competitive gymnastics. . She’ll probably settle in with time, but don’t force her to continue if it’s not making her happy. There is nothing wrong with putting her back into whatever program she was loving before. Good luck

 

[Dream]

My DD had that problem at 6. She was like "that coach is always telling me what to do." We had to explain to her that is literally the coaches job. She was skeptical but she ended up loving that coach by the end of the year.

 

[InMyGymMomEra]

My 6yo L1 daughter similarly had a couple of tricky practices when she transitioned from rec to team. She at first interpreted the corrections as criticisms, and felt defensive, even when the corrections were being given in a super-encouraging "you've got this!" kind of way. (In one practice she even sassed back to the coach, leaving me as a mom totally mortified! ) We dealt with it like "Dream" by explaining that it's literally the coach's job to give her corrections. We also made a list of things she could do if she has big feelings in the gym (e.g., take a deep breath, count to 5, make a mental note of something she wants to talk about with me after practice, get a drink of water). Lastly, she loves the Perfect Balance Gymnastics book series, and they have a goal setting journal that I bought for her. She set some goals for herself (e.g., to get her BHS, double back hip circle, etc.) and then was better able to frame the coach's critiques as helping her work towards the goals she had set for herself. We haven't had any problems since then. I also made her apologize to the coach for sassing! The thing it made me reflect on is that many of us adults have a hard time accepting constructive criticism (I will raise my own hand for this ), so even if she ultimately quits gymnastics this is an excellent life skill to develop at a young age!!

 

[KMC mom]

My 6yo L1 daughter similarly had a couple of tricky practices when she transitioned from rec to team. She at first interpreted the corrections as criticisms, and felt defensive, even when the corrections were being given in a super-encouraging "you've got this!" kind of way. (In one practice she even sassed back to the coach, leaving me as a mom totally mortified! ) We dealt with it like "Dream" by explaining that it's literally the coach's job to give her corrections. We also made a list of things she could do if she has big feelings in the gym (e.g., take a deep breath, count to 5, make a mental note of something she wants to talk about with me after practice, get a drink of water). Lastly, she loves the Perfect Balance Gymnastics book series, and they have a goal setting journal that I bought for her. She set some goals for herself (e.g., to get her BHS, double back hip circle, etc.) and then was better able to frame the coach's critiques as helping her work towards the goals she had set for herself. We haven't had any problems since then. I also made her apologize to the coach for sassing! The thing it made me reflect on is that many of us adults have a hard time accepting constructive criticism (I will raise my own hand for this ), so even if she ultimately quits gymnastics this is an excellent life skill to develop at a young age!!

Thank you so much, this was very very helpful! I just ordered the book and journal.