Parents Daughter having a hard time

[misshoneybee]

My daughter is 10 years old and an L5 gymnast. She is struggling at L5 (she just switched from L4 to L5 in Jan), which is to be expected. She has recently grown and is tall for her age - she has lost some of her skills, her kip, her back handspring is not very good. She is complaining that everything hurts when she tumbles (she can't be specific here), she says she doesn't look forward to going to practice, yet when I told her it would be okay if switched sports or didn't want to do it anymore she gets so upset and says she doesn't want to quit - she looks so sad all the time. I feel like she has hit a wall and I want to say the right things to her but I don't know what to say. Have any of you experienced this? If yes what have you done or said to your children to get them through this rough spot.

If she want to stop the sport - my husband and I are genuinely okay with it.

L

 

[flipper's fan]

I think most everyone here has been through this. Usually, everything comes back with time and practice once they grow in to their new body. Sometimes, learning a new skill provides some confidence and inspiration to re- perfect those old skills. Sounds like she doesn't want to give up, and seems to not even want you to suggest it. I'd just try to reflect back whatever she wants to hear- You'll get them back, don't get discouraged, keep trying, it happens to everyone.

 

[UnoMas]

YES! We have been going through just about the exact same thing with my older DD. She just turned 10 in December. Last summer when she switched from L4 to L5 she had really bad problems with her knee. It was very painful and all the added tumbling on vault and floor and bigger drop from the high bar really messed her little body up. My DD is also tall for a gymnast. She would come home crying because her knee hurt but she wanted to keep practicing. Last summer she also "lost" her BHS. Going from the one ROBHS to the RO BHS BHS completely messed her up. She does not have it "back" yet. She does it, but it is not pretty. She is getting about .8 to 1.0 in deductions from that skill alone at meets. Last fall, the week before her first big meet, she rolled her ankle at practice. It was a severe sprain but she managed to compete on it. However, it made her even more timid with the tumbling. She is also big time struggling with vault and cannot seem to improve it. She is repeating L5 which she is not happy about and you can tell she feels sad about all the "new" L5s who have moved up and already are doing some of the tumbling better than her. It is really a time of struggle for her. And for me watching her deal with it. Her knees have calmed down now which is good. We have state meet left in a week and then a LONG time until competition (fall/spring) so I am hoping she can view the summer as a time to hopefully fix those issues over a longer time period. My DD also LOVES lives and breathes gymnastics. Part of me wishes she'd try something else, but she doesn't want to. She is never going to be a superstar gymnast, I am hoping she can be ok with that and love the sport for wherever she happens to be in it.

Advice, well, I don't know if I have any. What I stress with her is that as long as she is improving on what she needs to improve on, she shouldn't care about scores and placements in relation to others. I tell her she is only competing with herself right now, and if she improves on her own skills or scores, then we should celebrate. I've gotten her a couple private lessons to help her with vault, can't say that it's helped much, but that's an option. I guess just changing the focus from moving up quickly and winning medals to gaining PERSONAL successes over her challenges right now is what I focus on. And I think it's helped, although she still wants to move to L6 next season, and has this formula in her head for what she needs to score at state meet to do it (which includes a 9.3 on beam and 9.5 on bars ). I guess we'll see what happens with her attitude after state.

Wow, this was long. Sorry. Just wanted you to know I am right there with you! I think the biggest gift to give your DD right now is time. As much time as she needs to get those skills back, don't rush her, don't rush her little body through the pain. If she loves gym, there is not going to be any way to convince her to try something else until SHE makes that decision. Hope this helps. I'm happy to chat with you about this any time!

 

[AlexsGymmyMom]

My DD moved to level 5 last Jan when she was 10. She struggled for awhile but it did all come together. She complains about little aches here and there (she is a little dramatic at times) so we just watch it and make sure it is not something that continues for long periods of time. I think there will always be times that going to practice will seem like a chore expecially when things are not clicking like she is used to. This teaches perserverence and the fact that she does not want to quit means that she loves the sport even though it is not always "fun". "this too will pass" is what I say to my DD when she feels down. Good luck.....if she keeps plugging away it will click in no time and she will be back to being excited about practice again!

 

[MdGymMom01]

My dd moved from Level 4 to 5 when she was 10 going on 11 and it can be difficult. Level 5 is a big jump in skill level and it can be easy to get discouraged when you are not scoring as well as you did in Level 4. What helped my dd was setting small daily goals for herself at practice. Right now she needs positive reinforcement and by setting and achieving small goals, it makes climbing that ladder of success a whole lot easier. I would have her write down the things that she thinks she needs to work on or improve on and make a list. It can be little things like:

I will try to keep my legs really straight in my BHS
I will try to keep my legs together in my BHS
I will do 3 really good BHS at practice today
I will try to keep my arms straight in my kip
I will make 10 really good glide swings in practice today
I will make 3 really good kips today in practice

These are just some examples, but you get the idea. Growth spurts can be tough to get through, but they do get through them. It just takes a little more practice and them getting used to their new bodies and adjusting to them.

Good luck and tell her to hang in there--it will get better!