Parents Did You Know When They Were Little?

[justanothergymmom]

Well-said, GJM!

 

[gymnut1]

Thanks GJM. I am interested in the fear issue because I coach 6-7 year olds and I am considering trying to introduce visualisation etc to help them later. I am also interested in spotting problems early and seeing if that can make a difference. Another one of our fear bunnies left this month.

The most talented kids seem to sail along getting skills left right and centre and then BAM. They hit a wall. Partly I think it is shock - they and their parents just don't see it coming. That makes it harder to deal with. Sometimes I think it is last man standing. If they stick it out long enough they start to do well as everyone else has dropped out. That is what my dd is hoping for anyway. tee hee.

 

[gymjourneymom]

Thanks GJM. I am interested in the fear issue because I coach 6-7 year olds and I am considering trying to introduce visualisation etc to help them later. I am also interested in spotting problems early and seeing if that can make a difference. Another one of our fear bunnies left this month.

The most talented kids seem to sail along getting skills left right and centre and then BAM. They hit a wall. Partly I think it is shock - they and their parents just don't see it coming. That makes it harder to deal with. Sometimes I think it is last man standing. If they stick it out long enough they start to do well as everyone else has dropped out. That is what my dd is hoping for anyway. tee hee.

Thank you for being a coach who really cares gymnut! I feel like so many coaches think that screaming "Go! Just go already will ya!" is really going to help a child suffering with fear issues & mental blocks. Yes, that might scare some gymnasts into going. Might shock them into getting over the occasional balk. But it's not the answer in the long run for kids with severe fear issues. They learn to just tune out the screaming, they become immune to it. Yes, ultimately they do NEED to just go for it, but it can be a long process for some to get there mentally, in there own head. Those kids need especially patient & supportive coaches, that are willing to take baby steps with them until they "own the skill". My DD actually has dreams of someday becoming a coach & coaching "the right way" those are her words.

 

[Shelovesthebars]

One of our team coaches introduced visualization to my daughter at 3. It is really fun to watch her stop and close her eyes in the middle of practice and put her fingers to her forehead. When I have been standing close enough on a rare occasion, I can hear her talking herself through a skill before she attemps it. So it does happen with one of my dd's coaches. It is fun to see this actually applied in one so young effectively. Also, Doc Ali visits our team kids on a regular basis and it is required that the team (not preteam kids) meet with her to talk. (Or whatever they do!)

 

[emandelsmom]

I have one of those who gets scared easliy. Usually after seeing someone hurt themselves doing something. She learned visualization from her gifted teacher at school. It helps. Although I have a musical child and the music in some of the CD's distracts her. According to her anyway.

 

[gymjourneymom]

What I have read about "burnout" and early bloomers is that it is not necessarily burnout from overtraining or being pushed like people think. It's that the early bloomers can get the idea that winning is the status quo. At some point the late bloomers catch up and the early bloomers are working for less reward. It's the change in perception of effort to benefit that creates "burnout."

So the concern for the early blooming athlete is over reward at the lower levels. When that stops happening, does she

(1) keep at it with good consistent effort, even though she's not getting the constant reinforcement of her former superstar situation; say to herself "oh well, I still love gymnastics even though I am now average at my level" and wait to rise towards the top again;

(2) go like crazy trying to get back to / stay on top; may get hurt, tired, GENUINE burnout (perhaps caused by coaches trying to keep her on top); or

(3) say, Gee if I can't win anymore the way I've been going, I'm through with it. (False burnout)

Yes, I can see this being true in DD's case. In the beginning winning was easy for her. Always brought home lots of bling at meets without really having to work at it. It became "expected" that she would always win, it seemed to come to her so effortlessly.

Then it got harder & more scary for her & the balking started. Which then morphed into severe fear issues/mental blocks as more stress & pressure was applied to her. She has worked constantly to overcome her fears, only to have another one develop. But she never gives up even though some of the coaches get very frustrated with her. Believe me...she is more frustrated with herself than any coach could ever be!

I have seen that sticking with it & working through her issues has helped her realize she loves the SPORT, not just the winning. I can see where now she has matured to the point of making a conscience decison. It's more about going for bigger skills & staying in the sport, than it is about the winning or high scores. That was an ego blow that she has come to terms with. It's more personal for her now. She's not doing it to impress others anymore, it's become a personal challenge. She has goals she wants to achieve on HER terms.

Can you tell I'm immensly proud of her?!? She may never make it to the higher levels of L10 or elite. But she's ok with that & so am I! There are many ways to be "successful" in this sport. L10 & elite are wonderful goals & I have the utmost respect for those girls! But all gymnasts are amazing in their own way. As Miley sings..."It's the climb!". Or my other favorite saying is..."It's the journey not the destination"...the Peaceful Warrior.

 

[gymjourneymom]

One of our team coaches introduced visualization to my daughter at 3. It is really fun to watch her stop and close her eyes in the middle of practice and put her fingers to her forehead. When I have been standing close enough on a rare occasion, I can hear her talking herself through a skill before she attemps it. So it does happen with one of my dd's coaches. It is fun to see this actually applied in one so young effectively. Also, Doc Ali visits our team kids on a regular basis and it is required that the team (not preteam kids) meet with her to talk. (Or whatever they do!)

Ok, where have you been my DD's whole gym career??? Sounds like you are at her dream gym!!! We're moving & switching to your gym ASAP! I don't know where you live...but it doesn't matter, we're coming, lol!

 

[Shelovesthebars]

Gymjourneymom- I know it is so cool to see the techniques one would associate with being taught to the higher level kids being taught to a 3 year old. I guess though my 3 year old (now 4) wasn't doing typical 3 year old skills so maybe the coach had the forethought to think this one through and give her this skill before fear sets in. So I guess even though she is young the process may be the same. When a kid is challenged, the possibility of experiencing fear increases. Good coaching I would say. It has worked for our gym with gold medal gymnasts, national team members and world team members all coming from our gym. They did say when my daughter was 3 that she would never be with kids her age. Maybe they are just preparing her a little bit at a time in a constructive way.