MAG He is taking a break.

[munchkin3]

What a long road to this point. I must say I am somewhat relieved because he has been really complacent and lazy during practice. After many months of vacillating between commitment and giving up, he has chosen to take a little time off.
To me it sounds like the end. And frankly, my son is terrified of the same thing.....is it the end?
He told me he really does NOT want to quit, and that he does not want to do any other sport. He's tried several sports over the years, but no......always gymnastics.

On the flip side, he knows he is in a very 'bad' time in puberty.....tired, achy, and generally not in proportion......he has said to me that he wants some time for perspective, and that he feels that gymnastics 'owes' it to him. All his commitment and dedication since he was 7, he feels that he needs this (he's 14). He wants to focus on finals and the end of school. I am all for it.
He said he hates that gymnastics is 100%, or 0%.... And he wishes there was more acceptance for middle of the road.....I think there is, but gym kids are so engrained with the all or none, it is hard to get him to see that 3 days workout is still better than all high schools sports!!!

But he is scared......he feels the 'risk' of taking the break.....that if he waits too long, it will be too hard to come back. Unfortunately, that is a risk that only he can take. He must figure out his inner desire for gymnastics if he has any left. No more pleasing mom and dad, and coaches.......all him..........

I sooooooo pray he does not quit!!!!!! It is such a wonderful environment!!!!! I am so scared he won't go back!!!!!

My only demands, he MUST get exercise, he MUST not sit on his butt......

 

[gymmomtoo]

How long is he planning to take off? Or is he just going to see how it goes? I hope he figures out what he wants!

 

[skschlag]

Oh that is so hard, but at least he knows what he is thinking. This could be a very good thing...and he will come back stronger. Good luck and keep us posted.

 

[profmom]

I really hope this works out for him well. He sounds like he's being very thoughtful about this. Good luck!

 

[gracyomalley]

such a hard time...DD is still coming back (or not...) from her 3 month break - still not doing much of what she's capable of, and trying to figure out if she really wants to...but she came back on her own (with encouragement when she had tried to fill the gap gym left and hadn't figured anything out) while several of her older friends have happily switched sports/activities and moved on. One thing is for sure - she no longer feels that gym is her all or nothing - and she's finding her own motivation there instead of doing things for other people.

It's been hard to watch. It is part of their figuring themselves out - so much easier when they are 8-9 year olds!!!

good luck!

 

[Popcorn]

Puberty is such a hard time, and gymnastics is such a hard sport, I imagine that going through them both at the same time is exhausting. I bet that, if he doesn't return to gymnastics full-force, he will excel at whichever sport he chooses.
(Or if he decides to play video games for a while, his muscles have memory!)
Best wishes to you both

 

[munchkin3]

He first said two weeks, then he said until after finals.....Mid May. This is not a big amount of time. He has just never done it before!

Funny thing is that I said I would hold off from paying May tuition so he could have time off, and he almost freaked out! He said that what if he misses it and wants to go back.............
Poor kid. He's been in there so long he cant stand the thought of NOT being on the 'team'. But it is not fair for me to throw money away either.

we will continue to encourage him with whatever sport he chooses. As I always say, 'I will feed you well, drive you to your sport, pay the amounts I can, and hug you....the rest is up to you.'

 

[Deleted member 10727]

Well, time off can be a very good thing, and it doesn't sound like he will be gone long. I was really upset when my (then 10 year old) son wanted to quit. Not just time off, but quitting for good. I tried everything I could think of, including a 2 week trial period. In the end, I had to just let go.

After he had 6 months off, and this season came to a close, he was driving me crazy at home. His energy level is more than I can manage without an outlet. He exercised, but it was nothing like what gymnastics can offer. We discussed it, and he decided to go back to gym. He had lost so much strength and flexibility! It's amazing what 6 months can do. However, he is regaining it back fast, and his circles on mushroom look better than ever. He is more motivated than he's been in years, too. The break, even though it was fairly long, did him good. Now we'll have to see how long he sticks to it this time.

 

[lilmisssunshine]

*hugs**
I wonder if maybe once summer rolls around, he'll want to focus on it more. It must be so hard to have so much going on at once.

 

[auswi]

IMHO you OP have done a marvellous job because you have a teenager who is in contact with his feelings ( or getting there) and is able to communicate to you how he's feeling!!

This world of kids sport is really about raising happy confident adults

And whether he returns to gym or not in the big picture he has a heap of skills!

Good luck

 

[munchkin3]

Thanks.....right now I do feel like we are making a mistake by not 'making' him do it......buy of course that would be impossible anyway (he's 14!). And I totally agree that gymnastics teaches WAAAAY more than gymnastics.....it really teaches life skills.

It took him 3 months to sort his feelings out! He was waffling and I finally prohibited him from going to gym because he was literally going to socialize and screw around, 0 work.....I could not allow that simply because of MY family's commitment to the gym and the team. It forced the issue, that's all......why was he doing what he was doing.....

He's almost 15.... He's not a baby.....commitment is commitment.....sometimes it sucks! Get over it.

I spoke with gym owner last night and he basically said they were willing to whatever necessary to keep him IN....he does not like loosing kids especially during the teen years.... BUT, he also said regardless of my sons gymnastics decision, gym owner wants to hear it from him. He wants to know what his plan is, either IN or OUT of the gym....if he stays in, then he will be given a home regimen, while he sorts his head out......if he leaves the sport, he wants to hear what his fall back sport is. We are totally on the same page.

 

[momto2js]

Is there a t&t team anywhere near you. That might be the middle ground you are looking for.

 

[magmom]

I so wish there was an Xcel style track for boys. There just aren't enough of them.

I may get murdered for suggesting this, but... high school cheer team?

 

[munchkin3]

I so wish there was an Xcel style track for boys. There just aren't enough of them.

I may get murdered for suggesting this, but... high school cheer team?

LOL Its ok, believe it or not, the cheer team at school has asked him before and he said no.... T&T he tried during a time when he was injured, and also no......plus, he would be in the gym anyway watching gymnastics.

We will see.....either way, he will be better for it.

 

[ZJsMom]

My son had a time after his level 6 season when he thought he might want to quit. We had him take 3 or 4 weeks off and try other sports. At the end of that time, he decided he liked gymnastic better than other sports and missed and he was ready to go back. I think giving them permission to quit actually makes it easier for them to decide to go back. Especially with a teenager, pressure to keep going will likely backfire.