Parents Help advice needed!

[Mom02]

Hi,
My daughter is level 4 gymnasts. She has been at current gym for 4 years. The gym has several satellite gyms. The girls at the other big gym- particularly where higher levels attend( after level 7, up to elite) , but they do train lower levels. Her current gym does not train higher levels. We have noticed that the other gym girls at her level are scoring 9s , my daughter is scoring mid-high 8s. My daughter wants 9s so she can change her ending of floor-that’s a rule the coach made. And she wants to place at higher levels. Last year around this time in the season she was scoring 9s. My daughter team mates at her current gym are scoring 7-8s.

the reason this is concerning to me is because last year both group of girls scores were neck n neck ( close to each other). When I mentioned this to coach re: my daughter not liking her scores. She told me my daughter is a “power” gymnast, and would do well when she reaches higher levels. I am not sure what this means exactly?

My daughter has asked to switch gyms for the past year. She says bc she wants a different coach. She feels they don’t listen to her or won’t listen. I will say my daughter was a complainer in her younger years, a bump of a toe - cry, cry. This was when she was 5-7, she has matured tremendously.

From a parent standpoint I’d like a gym that would take into consideration working parents schedules, but not sure if that is just the sport bc of hours needed to train, for example changing practice hours to earlier in the day bc children are on school break.

My daughter has started to get frustrated she doesn’t understand, she says she works so hard and doesn’t feel like her score has improved. I’m not sure what to do, where to send her?

my daughter plans to go far with gymnastics- she is talking national team or higher, but she’s 9. But I feel anything is possible, I want her to reach her full potential. The other gym is about 30 minutes from us and the satellite is about 19 minutes. I’m a single parent n finding help to drop her off is always challenging. There’s another gym about 7 minutes from us, but they are massive amount of kids there, and competitive parents- but do train elite and have a tops program.

I had her their at age 4-5 before, but pulled her bc I didn’t feel she was getting to workout- in her rec class she waited in line to get on apparatus with 10-12 older girls. They would not put her in preterm bc they told me they tried her out but she got too emotional, they didn’t tell me she was even up for consideration at the time. And then I had the parents asking me why isn’t your daughter in preteam she can do more than my daughter. But this was 5 years ago so not sure if it has changed.

I am in need of advice, I don’t want to offend her current coach by moving her to sister gym( my daughter wants to go there bc she knows the girls and I know what girl left at the start of level 5- parents said that gym was closer to their home- their daughter is excelling this year- places in top 3)
I am not even sure I can find someone to take her to practice or do I deal with gym a few minutes away. I definitely think it’s time for a change, as I am not sure what is going on with current coach/gym.
Help advice needed!

 

[Mom02]

Sorry typos- it should say one girl left and went to main gym at level and is excelling

 

[Mom02]

Sorry typos- it should say one girl left and went to main gym at level and is excelling

I also forgot to mention at current gym last years , level 4 didn’t advance to level 5 as didn’t have skills, except the girl who left n joined big gym. So my daughter is also practicing with them. I assumed it was bc of pandemic. These girls are not scoring 9s consistently. They also have my daughter working on level 5 skills which she can do most of them. So I’m not sure if is bc their current level4/5 girls didn’t have skills. And they don’t want a repeat. My daughter enjoys working on advanced skills-so that makes her happy.
So confusing

 

[Deleted member 26368]

Lots to digest here. My two cents (sorry for the lengthy post):

* Talk to her current coach. Let him/her know that your DD enjoys working higher level skills and wants to train higher levels at some point. The coach may agree and be able to work something out.
* Consider all aspects of what moving to the other gym will mean for your family. If you're already experiencing challenges getting her to practice at the current gym, you'd have to find a way to get her to the "main" gym. Potentially more hours.
* I can't say much about your DD's elite aspirations, but I gather from other parents on CB in that track that at 9, she "should be" in a more intensive gymnastics program.
* Comparing your DD's progress to that of other kids is a slippery slope. However, it seems like you have some valid concerns, which brings me back to the first point - talk to the coach about it. The coach may have a different perspective.
*Remind your DD that high scores are not everything gymnastics is about. Gymnastics is tough, even for the super talented (which it sounds like she is!). You can still have fun and learn in the sport without being elite/national team/etc., which very few kids will ever achieve (just being realistic, not criticizing your DD's dreams).

 

[Deleted member 26368]

Forgot to add: I have no idea what's up with the coach's rule about scoring 9s so she can modify her routine, but my DD is in Xcel. Seems like a silly rule, and is setting the girls up for too much of a focus on scores, but what do I know. Again, talk to the coach about it.

 

[ReluctantGymMom]

Are you in central Florida by any chance? Otherwise it’s just a a weird coincidence, but if you do, I’d have some advice!

 

[Mom02]

Are you in central Florida by any chance? Otherwise it’s just a a weird coincidence, but if you do, I’d have some advice!

Nope not in FL but could still use your advice

 

[Mom02]

Lots to digest here. My two cents (sorry for the lengthy post):

* Talk to her current coach. Let him/her know that your DD enjoys working higher level skills and wants to train higher levels at some point. The coach may agree and be able to work something out.
* Consider all aspects of what moving to the other gym will mean for your family. If you're already experiencing challenges getting her to practice at the current gym, you'd have to find a way to get her to the "main" gym. Potentially more hours.
* I can't say much about your DD's elite aspirations, but I gather from other parents on CB in that track that at 9, she "should be" in a more intensive gymnastics program.
* Comparing your DD's progress to that of other kids is a slippery slope. However, it seems like you have some valid concerns, which brings me back to the first point - talk to the coach about it. The coach may have a different perspective.
*Remind your DD that high scores are not everything gymnastics is about. Gymnastics is tough, even for the super talented (which it sounds like she is!). You can still have fun and learn in the sport without being elite/national team/etc., which very few kids will ever achieve (just being realistic, not criticizing your DD's dreams).

Thanks for the advice. I wanted to keep her in current gym til summer n switch. I will definitely need to have a conversation with her coach, but how do u bring up we want to go to the big gym?

 

[Mom02]

Thanks for the advice. I wanted to keep her in current gym til summer n switch. I will definitely need to have a conversation with her coach, but how do u bring up we want to go to the big gym?

What do mean a more intensive program? What should be asking or looking for in a gym?

 

[Deleted member 26368]

What do mean a more intensive program? What should be asking or looking for in a gym?

More intensive in terms of a gym with a reputation for producing elite or college-level gymnasts. However, that's based solely on what I've read on this forum, I have no first hand experience in this at all!

 

[B&M's mom]

As a single working mom with a kid who needed/wanted a more intense gymnastics experience than our local gym could offer, the first piece of advice is to work out the logistics before making any noises about moving her. It's no good if you can't get her there. For us, it meant my mother moving states to come and live with us to drive her to practice. Also consider how you would handle schooling as those types of programs typically require practices during school hours. We ended up doing part in school and part online classes. So, I had to spend time working with her on the online schooling. That may not be as much of issue after the last year but for us, it was a major change.

Also, I understand her aspirations but you may want to have her evaluated by a coach (not at the gyms you are talking about). Find out if its realistic. Note, I'm not saying it isn't but generally gyms with elite programs tend to move the kids into them as soon as they can. It isn't necessarily a good thing as elite gymnastics is really hard on their bodies and your pocketbook. Even though I knew my DD was capable of being on the track, we didn't move her until she was 11. Her first gym encouraged us to move but agreed to keep working with her until she was a bit older as I didn't want her doing 20-30 hours of practice as a 7,8,9, 10 year old. By the time she moved, she was starting level 9.

Good luck!

 

[Mom02]

Thanks for all the replies, it’s a lot to think about. I also may be moving soon, so can move closer to other gyms and closer to family that can help.

I didn’t realize 7-10 years old practiced 20+ a week. I’d think they burn out n not love the sport anymore. Again a lot to think about.

I think it’s just time to move gyms, it just seems like there’s so many unspoken rules on how it’s done. The big gym has produced several collegiate gymnasts as well n the other one in town, my only goal is that she reach her true potential n continue to love the sport!

 

[Carly]

Thanks for all the replies, it’s a lot to think about. I also may be moving soon, so can move closer to other gyms and closer to family that can help.

I didn’t realize 7-10 years old practiced 20+ a week. I’d think they burn out n not love the sport anymore. Again a lot to think about.

I think it’s just time to move gyms, it just seems like there’s so many unspoken rules on how it’s done. The big gym has produced several collegiate gymnasts as well n the other one in town, my only goal is that she reach her true potential n continue to love the sport!

I do not think that the majority of 7-10 year old gymnasts practice 20+ hours a week. (Someone please correct me if I am wrong.) It depends more on level than age and the individual gym.

My dd was at a very competitive gym with many level 10s that have gone on to do D1 college gymnastics over the years. They start 20+ hour practices for those training level 8 and up. Levels 3-7 practice 12-16 hours a week.

I would definitely do some thorough research before choosing a new gym. The girls at the new gym might be doing better but could be practicing twice the number of hours. That could possibly lead to burn out or overuse injuries. There have been posts about switching gyms and what to look for, so maybe do a search and you'll get some useful information.

Hope that you can find a new gym that works for you and your daughter!

 

[Mom02]

I do not think that the majority of 7-10 year old gymnasts practice 20+ hours a week. (Someone please correct me if I am wrong.) It depends more on level than age and the individual gym.

My dd was at a very competitive gym with many level 10s that have gone on to do D1 college gymnastics over the years. They start 20+ hour practices for those training level 8 and up. Levels 3-7 practice 12-16 hours a week.

I would definitely do some thorough research before choosing a new gym. The girls at the new gym might be doing better but could be practicing twice the number of hours. That could possibly lead to burn out or overuse injuries. There have been posts about switching gyms and what to look for, so maybe do a search and you'll get some useful information.

Hope that you can find a new gym that works for you and your daughter!

Yes she practices 12-14 hours a week, she mentioned to me that the coaches barely have time to watch girls, when she asked why she got deductions they’d say- we told you- tighten up. and only correct by saying tighten up or straighten your legs. I do not know if she knows what a tighten up feels like as I don’t think the coaches show, I know they don’t spot due to covid.
I told her season ends in may so let’s stick it out.

 

[Mom02]

Update:
DD moved to gym closer to home. We switched in June. Most of their level 10 go to college gymnastics, trained 1 elite. They moved her up to level 6/7 training. She just completed level 4. But will have mobility meet to test out of 5 in the fall.
Most importantly she is more than just a little excited. I’m just proud of her for sticking it out.
Old gym is undergoing some restructuring and a few of her teammates left as well.
Thanks for all your feedback!

 

[Mom02]

Update: Thank you for all your advice. She scored out of level 5 this week. Now she’s an official level 6 gymnast. She is super excited. I’m very proud of her. She now comes how bright n happy.