Parents How to help gymnastic with mental block?

[Ncgymnastmom]

My daughter is 10 and got held back from level 6 due to mental blocks so she’s currently competing xcel gold to gain confidence back even though she tested out of level 5 and will be level 6 or even 7 next season(her gym does xcel instead of level 3-5). Anyways she is having blocks with back tuck or layout connects. For the last 5 months she can’t do her round off backhand spring back layout(or backtuck) on floor or her cartwheel/roundoff backtuck dismount off beam(she does both variations not sure on which she’s competing yet). She will do it only if she has a coach standing near her(they don’t even touch her) if they aren’t near she will just freeze up and do the skill up to the backtuck/layout and stop then backtuck/back layout so no connect but she does it beautifully and connected if the coach is near enough to spot her. So she can 100% do the skill. She has only gotten hurt once when she hit her back hard on floor from bailing the backtuck and that was months ago. Anyways how can I help her? She’s getting super frustrated since it’s been months and she has to compete soon plus she doesn’t want to be held back next season! Any advice welcome. Her coaches are even at a loss because she can do it 100% fine anytime they act like they are spotting.

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

First and most important piece of advice I can give you: step back, breathe, and try not to worry about it.

I know that comes across as condescending and dismissive, but I truly do feel like this is the most important thing I can tell you, and I hope you'll bear with me for the explanation of why this is so important.

In order to deal with the mental and emotional challenges of gymnastics, I believe athletes need three things:
1) Motivation
2) Guidance and encouragement
3) A safe space to retreat to

The first can only come from the athlete herself. We as coaches and you as parents cannot force it, and any attempts to do so will do more harm than good.

The second is best when it comes from coaches. We are accompany them through their challenges, and provide on-the-spot support and encouragement.

The third one -- that's your job! Athletes need a place to retreat to where they do not feel pressured to succeed, where they know they are loved and supported unconditionally, where they could be the best gymnast ever or the worst gymnast ever and it would make zero difference. You, as a parent, are uniquely able to provide that.

Unfortunately, kids are extremely perceptive; if you're stressing about their mental blocks, they'll pick up on it. And then home is no longer a sanctuary away from the pressure, it's just an additional avenue for it.

If she comes home from her next practice devastated because her coaches have told her she can't move up due to these blocks, the best thing for her will be to get home and have dinner with a family who loves and supports her regardless of success or failure at the gym.
If, on the other hand, she comes home from her next practice triumphant because she has conquered her fear and her coaches have told her she's ready to move up, the best thing for her will be to get home and have dinner with a family who loves and supports her regardless of success or failure at the gym.

 

[Milomom]

Complete performance coaching (perform happy program and podcast) help both me and my daughter a lot. We were both approaching it wrong and it helped me to back off (I still worry, but I stopped asking her anything about it), and she learned how to regain her confidence. She had lost her fly away and BHS on beam as well as was struggling on floor. We did a month with 1:1 sessions plus working through there on line program - then her psychologist went on maternity leave, so we paused the 1:!, she still did the workbooks, I did the parent videos/workbook and then we started listening to the podcast in the car on the way to practice. She put in about 2 months of work and her skills are back. She has her first meet this weekend and coach says she is good to compete all event at level 6 - in august, they were considering moving her to gold/platinum.

 

[Ncgymnastmom]

Complete performance coaching (perform happy program and podcast) help both me and my daughter a lot. We were both approaching it wrong and it helped me to back off (I still worry, but I stopped asking her anything about it), and she learned how to regain her confidence. She had lost her fly away and BHS on beam as well as was struggling on floor. We did a month with 1:1 sessions plus working through there on line program - then her psychologist went on maternity leave, so we paused the 1:!, she still did the workbooks, I did the parent videos/workbook and then we started listening to the podcast in the car on the way to practice. She put in about 2 months of work and her skills are back. She has her first meet this weekend and coach says she is good to compete all event at level 6 - in august, they were considering moving her to gold/platinum.

I’ll look into this thanks

 

[Ncgymnastmom]

First and most important piece of advice I can give you: step back, breathe, and try not to worry about it.

I know that comes across as condescending and dismissive, but I truly do feel like this is the most important thing I can tell you, and I hope you'll bear with me for the explanation of why this is so important.

In order to deal with the mental and emotional challenges of gymnastics, I believe athletes need three things:
1) Motivation
2) Guidance and encouragement
3) A safe space to retreat to

The first can only come from the athlete herself. We as coaches and you as parents cannot force it, and any attempts to do so will do more harm than good.

The second is best when it comes from coaches. We are accompany them through their challenges, and provide on-the-spot support and encouragement.

The third one -- that's your job! Athletes need a place to retreat to where they do not feel pressured to succeed, where they know they are loved and supported unconditionally, where they could be the best gymnast ever or the worst gymnast ever and it would make zero difference. You, as a parent, are uniquely able to provide that.

Unfortunately, kids are extremely perceptive; if you're stressing about their mental blocks, they'll pick up on it. And then home is no longer a sanctuary away from the pressure, it's just an additional avenue for it.

If she comes home from her next practice devastated because her coaches have told her she can't move up due to these blocks, the best thing for her will be to get home and have dinner with a family who loves and supports her regardless of success or failure at the gym.
If, on the other hand, she comes home from her next practice triumphant because she has conquered her fear and her coaches have told her she's ready to move up, the best thing for her will be to get home and have dinner with a family who loves and supports her regardless of success or failure at the gym.

I have definitely been starting to stress too myself because I know she has been working so hard. I’ll try to step back and give her space thanks for the advice!