WAG I think I'm turning into a CGM

[rjb123]

I tell my daughter all the time that it is not the training group that makes the difference- it is what you DO with and in your training that matters. I remind her that she just needs to make the absolute most of the group she is in. Apply corrections that the coaches give her, be focused on what she is doing, give conditioning her utmost- that is what REALLY matters in the end. This sport is FILLED with this kind of stuff- all. the. time. Take it from me- you can make yourself crazy trying to figure it all out, or you can ignore the crazy and just focus on the good, and encourage your daughter to do it too! You will both be happier and saner for ignoring it in the long run.

 

[charity]

I tell my daughter all the time that it is not the training group that makes the difference- it is what you DO with and in your training that matters. I remind her that she just needs to make the absolute most of the group she is in. Apply corrections that the coaches give her, be focused on what she is doing, give conditioning her utmost- that is what REALLY matters in the end. This sport is FILLED with this kind of stuff- all. the. time. Take it from me- you can make yourself crazy trying to figure it all out, or you can ignore the crazy and just focus on the good, and encourage your daughter to do it too! You will both be happier and saner for ignoring it in the long run.

Thank you.

 

[gymdog]

Honestly, I think you're letting it get to you too much I would just pretend you don't know and carry on. Your DD may get the 35 AA soon anyway. Do I personally agree with what the coaches are doing, well, I wouldn't make the same decision and a kid would have to be getting a lot higher than a 35 in level 4 for me to group them with an optional practice. But that's just me.

It sounds like the mom asked because she is older is there any way she can get to optionals faster and they said she could come an extra day...then they realized others may ask and they can't accommodate everyone so they needed to put some sort of requirement. I would think of it more of her being grandfathered in than an exception. My guess is they just didn't realize others would want an extra day so at first when she entered the group there was no score requirement. Then they realized they needed some sort of filter, but they couldn't very well kick her out. So, poor planning but I doubt any malice or unfair exception was intended.

 

[Sasha]

I can relate to the feelings, OP! Glad you are over it now. Thanks for sharing!

My DD's first season (she was 8), she was potentially targeted to skip L3 and move to L4. She had had her kip (the primary gateway skill) for some time with natural bars ability, etc... Then the big day came to announce, and they put her in L3, citing she hadn't mastered a couple things. Ugh - back to mill circles The next day we see that a 13 year old has been invited to L4 (skipping L3) who is nowhere close to a kip and missing a couple other skills as well. Of course our knee-jerk reaction was "what the heck??". It's not that we didn't support the 13 year old to be given the chance, but the issue was the obvious inconsistency in the application of criteria.

Admittedly, it took some time for me to see the bigger picture, and the evolution of my current reasoning that there is really zero way to consistently apply standards across all children equally and have it be in the best interest of each gymnast. There have to be exceptions for individual circumstances. It's likely the lovely 13 year old girl would have quit being in the L3 group mill-circling with a bunch of 8 year olds, whereas the L4 girls were at least up to age 11. That girl is now a 14.5 year old L6 with peers and happy.

Thanks again for sharing your story!

 

[charity]

No offense and not sounding snarky at all, but there really is no good way to handle it in these situations. There will always be children who are upset, grownups who are bitter (not saying you are one of those!), and people who question the coaches' decisions. I think that is just human nature. And it is really impressive that your daughter is doing so well for such a young age; try and focus on that. At least the girls don't do the extra practice when your daughter is there.

That is the thing that gets me a little, my dd is there when they are doing the extra practice. Hence her asking if she wasn't good enough. She's there watching them learning the lv5 routine while my daughter sits and waits for the stretch class to begin.

 

[raenndrops]

I am soaking it all in. I take this as gymnastics growing pain and I'm sure it won't be the last.

My dd and I will be okay. I have to support her and be there for her even more. Thank goodness she still love this sport and still have fun doing it. She loves her gym and the coaches.

That's all we can do I find that deep breaths help too

 

[duyetanh]

That is the thing that gets me a little, my dd is there when they are doing the extra practice. Hence her asking if she wasn't good enough. She's there watching them learning the lv5 routine while my daughter sits and waits for the stretch class to begin.

Use that for inspiration then!! I know that would motivate the heck out of my girl.

 

[GYM0M]

That is the thing that gets me a little, my dd is there when they are doing the extra practice. Hence her asking if she wasn't good enough. She's there watching them learning the lv5 routine while my daughter sits and waits for the stretch class to begin.

Please don't take offense to this, but at your DD's level, scoring decently, but not knocking it out of the park with 38+, she will benefit MORE from being in the STRETCH class as opposed to working the higher level skills. I PROMISE!!

 

[l.c.o]

Well, the upside is, admitting you have a problem is half the battle?

FWIW, I can't figure out how exactly they decide who to move up or place in which groups. One girl is moving out of DD's group and two are moving into it (group sizes were imbalanced...). There's even a potential third girl who could also move up, depending on her recovery from mono. Anyway I guess my point is it's not really the girls that I would have assumed would move around.

I no longer try to guess where anybody will be each cycle they regroup. I don't even try to predict where my own DD will be. And I've never pushed to get DD extra practice time, even when a couple of teammates got it. I figure there are reasons, and sometimes, it doesn't even have so much to do with talent. Sometimes some kids just need a boost. And there's not even always a benefit.

If she's 12, I'd cut her some slack. There's something to be said for slow and steady, as well. There's the potential for better form and less burnout. Your DD has time.

 

[Faith]

As I said in my previous post, my dd is not allowed because there is a requirement of getting a 35aa. And the reason why Susie is put in that group is that she asked and the reason why they have it. Even though Susie didn't really earned the spot by getting a 35.

I'm willing to bet it went something like this;

Susie's mom- "Susie is 12 and would like to fast track to optionals, is that possible, and how can it be done?"
Coach- "well, she does have talent, and could make optionals quickly with some extra help. Why doesn't she come in for a session with the optionals and up train once a week"
Everyone else- "Susie is training with the optionals once a week, can little suki do that too?"
Coach thinks- er no, group will be too big, and some of them aren't ready. How do we communicate that to the parents without getting into arguments over who is ready and who isn't, and constantly being asked if suki can move up yet...

Coach- "Hey parents! Little gymmies can train with the optionals when they hit 35aa"

Then the parents have a definitive target when their little darlings get to move up, and its way less of a headache for the coach.

ETA: I'd be thankful susie did ask. If she hadn't, nobody would have the option. At least now susie's set precedent, your DD will get the benefit.