Coaches Need Advice on Setting Coaching Boundaries with My Assistant

[quinnieflipz]

I’m the Xcel Silver and Gold coach at my gym. I generally run all of my practices with them, with my assistant only taking the lead if I’m absent. She’s only at the gym two days a week, while I’m there every day and attend all my girls’ meets.

Lately, it’s been extremely frustrating because she seems to step in quickly to give instructions over me—even on things I’ve already started—and it feels like she’s trying to forcibly take the lead rather than supporting me. This isn’t just about one incident; it happens often enough that it’s starting to affect how smoothly the class runs.

I am not a confrontational person in situations like this, and I also feel a little worried about overstepping since I’m not her boss or manager, but I do want to make sure our roles are clear so the team has consistency. I enjoy my job, but this situation has been making me dread days where she is there. How would you communicate boundaries in a friendly, professional way without causing tension?

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

Best to address it directly, as soon as possible. First, mention it before or after class, and if you don't want it to feel confrontational, you can frame it as trying not to overload the kids with information, and keeping it to one focus at a time. That might be all it takes; if not, though, call it out when it happens. If that doesn't work, mention it to a superior.

In coaching (and in life) it's easy to fall into a habit of making yourself smaller to avoid confrontation; in coaching (and in life), learning to establish those boundaries early rather than letting things slide is generally best.