Flyaway
Proud Parent
If you "know" me, you know that I work pretty hard to stay out of dd's gymnastics. I try to keep my questions about gym to "what was fun today?" or "what made you proud today?". I rarely watch practice. I don't make it a habit to question the coaches about everything or complain about every little thing. In other words, I try to be a good gym mom.
Recently, due to scheduling I had to arrive at the gym about an hour before pick up time. When I got there dd was working on a new drill for a new skill. It was fun and exciting so I got out my phone to video a few of her attempts, thinking she'd like to see herself do the drill. Things were going fine for awhile. Then once the coach stepped away, it fell apart. She was unable to complete the drill without a coach standing nearby and she just flat out got in her head. She came over to me after the rotation and completely melted down, which is so strange for her. Usually she's able to handle frustration. I switched into triage mode and calmed her down and got her back on the floor.
After gym, I cautiously approached the subject of her meltdown. After a few minutes of conversation, the crux of the issue came out: while she was attempting (and failing) the drill, one of her teammates asked her why she kept bailing, since her mom was videoing her. Oops. She told me she felt a lot of pressure to do the drill FOR ME, but she wasn't ready yet. I had completely innocent intentions, and had inadvertently and unknowingly put pressure on my dd to do a drill that she wasn't quite mentally ready to do by herself, because I was videoing and she didn't want to let me down.
Yikes.
I'm not beating myself up, but I AM taking notes for the future. We discussed solutions, like for example from now on I will wait until she asks me to video her, so that she can choose when she's mentally ready to be recorded.
I just wanted to share my experience as an example of how even the most innocent of things can and will put pressure on a gymnast. It's opened my eyes to other behaviors I might have that to me mean nothing, but could possibly be sending a different message to her.
Recently, due to scheduling I had to arrive at the gym about an hour before pick up time. When I got there dd was working on a new drill for a new skill. It was fun and exciting so I got out my phone to video a few of her attempts, thinking she'd like to see herself do the drill. Things were going fine for awhile. Then once the coach stepped away, it fell apart. She was unable to complete the drill without a coach standing nearby and she just flat out got in her head. She came over to me after the rotation and completely melted down, which is so strange for her. Usually she's able to handle frustration. I switched into triage mode and calmed her down and got her back on the floor.
After gym, I cautiously approached the subject of her meltdown. After a few minutes of conversation, the crux of the issue came out: while she was attempting (and failing) the drill, one of her teammates asked her why she kept bailing, since her mom was videoing her. Oops. She told me she felt a lot of pressure to do the drill FOR ME, but she wasn't ready yet. I had completely innocent intentions, and had inadvertently and unknowingly put pressure on my dd to do a drill that she wasn't quite mentally ready to do by herself, because I was videoing and she didn't want to let me down.
Yikes.
I'm not beating myself up, but I AM taking notes for the future. We discussed solutions, like for example from now on I will wait until she asks me to video her, so that she can choose when she's mentally ready to be recorded.
I just wanted to share my experience as an example of how even the most innocent of things can and will put pressure on a gymnast. It's opened my eyes to other behaviors I might have that to me mean nothing, but could possibly be sending a different message to her.