Parents Part Frustrated Vent/Part "Help Me Understand"

[cbifoja]

Never mind. Too much identifying information necessary to communicate my frustration.

 

[Natasha]

Perhaps simply asking the coach if it is a form issue? Although, regardless of whether her reason is for form or not, you have said that she struggles with form. IMO, compulsories is a great place to focus on form and it is much easier to fix form on skills you can already do than trying to fix form while learning new skills. We have a gymnast who came to our gym 2 years ago after competing L6. Although her skill level was equivalent to our L7 group, she did not have solid form at all. (I think she averaged a 31AA at L6) She ended up doing another year of L6 at our gym while focusing on form. Last season she competed L7 and ended up being the beam state champion!
I don't think that having your daughter do another year of compulsories means at all that the coach has lost faith in her. If anything, perhaps it means she thinks your dd has matured enough to really focus on the form now. And trust me, you want to fix the form before optional level of competition.

 

[cbifoja]

Thank you for your words. Honestly, before the coach began the talk about optionals, I was EXPECTING her to do another year at compulsories as our gym typically doesn't skip levels and we do compete a full year at what was the old L6. I guess my frustration is just with getting DD all hopped up about optionals when it now feels like coach is pulling the rug from out of under her.

She will compete and will compete at this gym no matter what. But I would just like to know why her tone has changed so much from last month. If it's form, then why even bring up optionals, you know? It's not like her form has become worse in the past month. LOL

 

[Natasha]

THat is frustrating. I'm sorry.

 

[lhmom]

It probably would've been best for your daughter's coach if he/she had been noncommittal until the optional changes were released. That way, expectations would not have been raised. How's your girl handling it?

 

[cbifoja]

She is surprisingly determined. She said that she WILL be doing optionals next season and has even started making a list of floor music that she wants to run by her coach. She told me just to wait and see how hard she works this summer.

I struggle with support and reality. I love her attitude but you know how it is when you think your child is going to be hurt....it's hard to sit back and watch. It's even more difficult when she doesn't understand that her skill set might not be the issue and that I can't exactly say what the issue is.

 

[lhmom]

She is surprisingly determined. She said that she WILL be doing optionals next season and has even started making a list of floor music that she wants to run by her coach. She told me just to wait and see how hard she works this summer.

I struggle with support and reality. I love her attitude but you know how it is when you think your child is going to be hurt....it's hard to sit back and watch. It's even more difficult when she doesn't understand that her skill set might not be the issue and that I can't exactly say what the issue is.

LOL! That is determination on her part. Would it be possible to meet one on one with her coach? Maybe say that you want to hear the coach's reasons so that you can help your daughter understand the decision? Not sure how accessible her coach is but maybe it would help a bit. Good luck to her and to you! I know that I'd be feeling the same way if I were in your shoes.

 

[MeetDirector]

I agree with LHMom - try and set up a one-on-one meeting at a time when the head coach is not coaching. maybe meet for coffee. I have found it is always better when you can look them in the eye and read thier body language and they are not in a rush to get the next group started or to get home to dinner.

And if its any solace, most gym parents that have been in the sport a while have been where you are and felt the way you do. It does pass and it is surprising and refreshing to see how resilient and determined our athletes can be.

Good Luck.

 

[cbifoja]

Thank you all for your advice and suggestions....especially those of you who didn't get the whole back story before I got nervous about having DD identified. I will speak with DD's coach this evening about setting up a time to meet and see if I can get more information about the change in tone.

 

[cbifoja]

Just got out of a meeting with coach. I feel so much better and am so glad that I listened to you all. She had nothing but positive things to say about DD, gave me a very thorough update on where she is skillwise and how she believed DD would be just fine for next season. It turns out there are issues in this other training group that have nothing to do with my kid.....

 

[MeetDirector]

Nothing like face-to-face communication to remove questions and calm fears & doubts. If more people would take this simple route there would be so much less stress.

Good luck!

 

[lhmom]

Just got out of a meeting with coach. I feel so much better and am so glad that I listened to you all. She had nothing but positive things to say about DD, gave me a very thorough update on where she is skillwise and how she believed DD would be just fine for next season. It turns out there are issues in this other training group that have nothing to do with my kid.....

I'm glad that you got some answers!! Hope that it helps your DD as well.