The day has come . . .

[AlexsGymmyMom]

:grouphug: BIG GROUP HUG!! I know it must be hard. Good for her making the decision on her own terms! I guess we all will face this decision at some point with our gymmies. I am sure she will find plenty of things to fill her life! (minus the boys!!) Keep posting here because I for one have always appreciated your point of view!!!

 

[gymmutti]

TQM - I have enjoyed your posts and I hope that you will continue to come on the boards and let us know how life after gymnastics goes for your daughter.

 

[flipper's fan]

I'm gonna miss you! Please let us know what she does next and how it all works out for her. We are all going to be there someday.

 

[ek2]

Wow tqm!!! Big hugs, I know exactly what you are going through!!! This is such a tough sport. There is something about gymnastics, over most other sports I think, that makes it difficult to stay in, but almost impossible to leave! I wish I knew why?
I will be thinking about you all this fall....

 

[gym law mom]

I would ask her to give everything a week or 2. Seems the start of the school year is tough on many kids. They see so much they have to do and get in a panic. Certainly if in a few weeks she still feels the same, then exiting gracefully is the right choice. Promise you'll stick around---love reading your advice!

 

[ARKGYMMOM]

My heart breaks for you however after going thru this in anohter sport with both of my daughters I know you will make it through. I still vist the forum for the other sport on a daily basis because we make such wonderful friends beacause of our children. It seems to be harder on the parents sometimes than the kiddos. We have found new "family" in gymnastics and golf and the kids are happier than ever so, believe me when I say "life will go on". You too will hold on to your gym family for a lifetime but will gain more at another venue. Good Luck and I know you will still be watching us here......

 

[drivingmom]

Sad I find it so interesting our attachment to this sport. Some of our kids sports have a special place in hearts, just it they do for our kids.

I know I will feel a loss when my DD quits. I know I did when my oldest quit, but I still had another in this sport we love.

Time for your new chapter!

 

[GymGran]

Kudos to you for supporting your daughter's decision.
6th grade is a challenging and sometimes difficult time for youngsters; and more-so for parents.
What your DD loves today, she will scorn next week.
Good luck. Be patient. But, do keep her busy.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

Thanks so much everyone for the kind, supportive words. I AM taking this so hard... never thought I was such an "involved" mom, but as others have said, this sport has really been all about bonding w/DD!! I went in to work today and as I was telling my coworkers, I started to cry!!! I mean, my gosh, you'd think someone was seriously ill or worse!!

We've had so much fun together with it, going to college meets, going to her meets, team activities, etc. and I kind of feel lost knowing that's going to end. I KNOW this isn't about ME, but darn it... it is... at least a little bit!!!!

I asked her to hold off on her decision for a week or two, and she is adamant. I reminded her of how she told me just TWO WEEKS ago, that she couldn't wait to get the new team leo and warmups (which I JUST PAID FOR!!!!), but she really doesn't want to do it anymore....

She had already done a year of prep Op in 9th grade, doesn't want to go back to that either!!! Oh well, she can get a job if all else fails, right???

GymGran, she's in 11th grade, not 6th... makes a huge difference.... I just hope she can find something QUICK since she'll be taking SAT's in the spring as well as college applications/visits this summer.... so much to think/worry about. At least w/gym, it showed how she was occupying all of her spare time!

Thanks again everyone, it is helpful for me to read all the kind words.

 

[Trixiebelle]

I can completely understand how you feel. Hope your DD and you find lots of new joys whatever she may pursue.

 

[txgymfan]

TQM, I've been on this foum for a long time. I remember your dd's struggles with level 7 and her decision to do prep op and then USAG. As sad as I am for you, I am happy she is going out because of a decision and not because of FEAR.

You might see if she will sign up for a Yoga or pilates class with you. If not that, something else fun that she has not had a chance to try. If you do exercise together, she will kick your behind which she will love. At least you might want to have a gentle conversation about finding an exercise routine that she enjoys. She will lose muscle and she may not enjoy the effects on her body when she stops working out 16 hours a week. Girls that age can be so sensitive about theri bodies but it may be a necessary conversation.

Good luck with the leo's etc. You might see if the gym could sell it to anyone joining the team late.

You are an incredibly supportive mom and we enjoy reading your insightful comments. Take care of yourself during this transition.


By the way, now that you will not be paying for gym, give yourself a treat and sign up for a class you enjoy. You have more free energy and she will be gone in a few years. Try investing some energy into your own pleasure, it may make the transition easier for you both.

 

[LizzieLac]

For what it is worth, we have had girls in high school quit gymnastics for all of the reasons mentioned. Wanted to try other things, have more time for school friends, didn't want to be in the gym 18 hours a week. Guess what? They came back!! Some just need to take that break to realize that the other sports don't do it for them and they miss their teammates, etc.

 

[gymjourneymom]

TQM, Where do I even begin to start??? I've often felt as though you & I are kindred spirits here on CB!!! Our DD's are the same age & have shared similar struggles in this sport. You & I have seen eye to eye on more topics then I can remember. For pretty much every topic, if you got to post before me I just had to "thank" what you already posted, because it was just what I would have said anyway!

Your DD has had such wonderful life experiences & lessons in this sport! She will ALWAYS have those lessons to draw from. You have given her a wonderful gift by being so supportive of her love of this sport. She will have that unconditiontional love & support you provide with her ALWAYS. As the saying goes..."There are 2 things we need to give our children one is roots & the other is wings". It's time for your DD to use her wings!

I know this is a difficult time for you(((hugs)))! But I am sooooo proud of your DD & ALL that she has accomplished. The maturity she has displayed in deciding when SHE was ready to move on. I wish you & your DD all the VERY best!!! Please promise to keep us posted about LAG(life after gymnastics). I think this is any exciting time for you both. Can't wait to hear what the next chapters in your lives bring!!! Love~GJM

 

[Pickle's Mom]

I could have written this and Pickle is only 9. For all my gripes about the cost and the time commitment for gymnastics to the family, the fact is that it has become part of all of our lives. And when Pickle eventually gives it up, it will feel like a loss to me too.

But I also think this could be a positive and exciting thing for your DD. Maybe she will get involved in yearbook or model UN or the school play. When I was in HS, I was editor of the school paper and I learned so much. There are so many things girls miss out on when they are competitive gymnasts and you don't get those high school years back.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

Thanks everyone for all of the kind, supportive statements. I knew that the only place I could come and express my dismay would be here.... as we all know, our "normal" friends all think we're crazy for having our sons and daughters participate in this sometimes crazy sport!!!

I am amazed by all the support I've received here!!! WOW!!! It's almost overwhelming!!! I am finally starting to crawl out of my funk over this situation. DD has already moved on. It just amazes me how she can just walk away from all of this so easily!!! Ahhhh... youth!!!!

She has already signed on to be part of the "Hall Decorating Committee" for homecoming; has signed up to play in the PowderPuff Football game and is begging for her own Gold's gym membership to keep in shape! Her coach/owner wants her to come in and talk to the gym manager about becoming starting out as an Assistant Coach for Rec Classes on Saturdays. Evidently there's some kind of class offered through USA gymnastics for high school students wanting to coach... .has anyone heard about this? Oh, and DD still wants to do her high school gymnastics team in the winter.

Yes, she's definitely had her struggles with fears/mental blocks and injuries through the years. Did a year of Prep Op to build back her confidence and worked through everything. And I love how some of you have mentioned that she quit because she was at the point where she wanted to move on, and it wasn't due to any fears or injuries. That's definitely something to be happy about.

I don't think I'm going to be able to break my almost several year old habit of visiting here and expressing my sometimes too vocal opinions about how some things happen in the gym world.

Good luck to everyone for the upcoming competition season!

 

[Panda-girl's Mom]

Hugs to you. Having recently gone through this with my 11yo who was on the team for 4 years it was alot harder than I ever thought but things have gotten better. I almost felt like I was going through a divorce crazy! I have stayed in touch with the other gym parents through facebook but it does feel really weird not to be a part of the gym. I think the hardest part for me was seeing the reaction of my family and friends when I told them she was no longer doing gymnastics, everybody was shocked when in reality being in the gym world it is very common for girls to leave the sport. What has made it better is daughter seems to be having fun doing other things, I think that was her biggest problem with the sport was it was no longer fun she was always in pain. We do not have a gymnastic high school team here but at least your daughter will get a chance to still do it and she lasted longer than most girls and making it to level 8 is an accomplishment. I think I also felt sad about daughter leaving because she did all those years in the compulsary levels and this year she would of finally got her own routines and the optionals at her gym go to out of state meets together and have alot of fun, and daughter never got to experience this. It does get better with time.