WAG When your parent lies to the gym about you

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MVJ

Gymnast
Joined
Mar 21, 2013
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One month ago, I posted a thread about choosing between T&T or artistic and then came back with the news of switching to T&T. My parents agreed, though my dad a little reluctant. At that point, I already had been out of gym for a bit due to vacation and a small injury. Meanwhile on my hiatus we've been cut off from the gym's member site and off the emailing list. So I asked my dad if he could contact the gym again, and he said he did, but he said he wasn't getting a reply. I've been waiting for a month. I know it was a bad idea to look, but last week his computer screen displayed an email he had just sent to the gym and I guess I just...read it.
It was said that we would not be returning as because he is "sick of the bs" and that I, myself, do not want to return. The latter is false! It also asked for a refund from the gym. My dad had never been on the best terms with my coaches, and I feel extremely embarrassed and shocked.


My mum and I were planning to go visit the gym again in person, but now I don't think it would be right. We've been at our new gym for just under a year so it isn't like the owner knows us too well. I think my coaches and teammates have already concluded that I have quit and I do not think we would be welcome back.

Would it be okay to go back, provided we talk my dad back into it? It just feels so wrong to leave like this.
 
Whatever disagreements you're having with your dad are between you and him, and I will not weigh in on them.

But I can tell you that if I, as a gym staff member, got an e-mail like that and it wasn't true, I would feel so much better if I heard from the kid again. I always hate it when kids leave on a sour note.
 
#1 Take a few minutes to write a nice letter to your previous coach(s). Let them know how much you appreciate everything they did for you, and how much you loved the sport. Be sincere in your praise and appreciation. DO NOT "throw your dad under the bus". Remain respectful of him in everything. I think it would be okay to say you've had disagreements with your dad over your gym participation, but check with your mom first. This letter will make you feel much better about how you've left things, and it will probably mean a lot to your coach(s).

#2 Work this out with your dad. He obviously has some very strong feelings for some reason. Be open to hearing him out, and be willing to compromise on a solution. Reading his email was just as wrong as him lying...so you have to approach this by admitting some mistakes on your part first. "Seek first to understand, then to be understood". if you keep that thought in mind, you may have better luck finding a happy ending. GOOD LUCK!!!!
 

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