WAG Which way do we go?

[onelittledream]

Well name is changed now so hopefully no damage done. Thank you everyone for your guidance and support.

 

[LJL07]

If you did want to post video, there are private social forums you can join (brag alert, parents of compulsory gymnasts, etc.). You have to get permission to join, so it offers a little more privacy. Just a thought. Hope your name change helps-

 

[GYM0M]

I use YouTube, mask the title, tag only as recreation, set the privacy so that only those with a link can view some videos, and I share the videos with those that I feel comfortable with on here through a private message! No weirdos yet! (Knock on wood)

 

[kandkfunk]

Congrats on the way things worked out. Hopefully, you can have a fun competitive season and see where it takes you. Good luck!

As to CGMs, we were around one for my daughter's entire gymnastics career. Some of the things she would get upset about really boggled my mind. Like others have said, she knew how many attempts each girl got or how many minutes they received instruction from the coaches and she would just fume. She would never really talk to the coaches, she would just talk about them. I got really good at looking like I was listening to her rants while I was actually making my shopping list I always thought she would change, but I eventually realized that this was her personality. She probably kept score on everything in her life. It was exhausting being an acquaintance. I can't imagine how her family and close friends managed. I guess the moral of my story is that sometimes these dramatic gym parents are just dramatic in everything they do. It might not go away, so you will learn how to avoid or deal with it.

 

[Ali'sMom]

I use YouTube, mask the title, tag only as recreation, set the privacy so that only those with a link can view some videos, and I share the videos with those that I feel comfortable with on here through a private message! No weirdos yet! (Knock on wood)

I'm still new to YouTube and rights and privacy...

Is there a way to link a YouTube post here (not private message), but make it so it can only be seen here? meaning that I don't have to make it "public" on youtube?

 

[bogwoppit]

YOu can set it so that only people who you share the link with can see it. SO you can post the link here, But, and it is a big but, we have thousands of lurkers here daily, more lurkers than members in fact. We have no idea who they are, but I can bet a whole ton of them are the kind of people you are trying to avoid on youtube.

 

[Ali'sMom]

YOu can set it so that only people who you share the link with can see it. SO you can post the link here, But, and it is a big but, we have thousands of lurkers here daily, more lurkers than members in fact. We have no idea who they are, but I can bet a whole ton of them are the kind of people you are trying to avoid on youtube.

Thank you!
It would only be in one of the smaller groups. Maybe I'll just stick to PM

 

[skschlag]

If you share in one of the private social forums, it limits who can see it to only the ones in that group.

 

[IreneKa]

I'm still new to YouTube and rights and privacy...

Is there a way to link a YouTube post here (not private message), but make it so it can only be seen here? meaning that I don't have to make it "public" on youtube?

If they are "public" then anyone who opens your channel can see them, and they also would show up when someone searches for specific key words.
If you make them "unlisted", then only those who has the link can see them. They don't show up on your channel, or in searches. That still doesn't make it safe to post on public forum, but if you only PM or email that link to a few people, then only those people will be able to see it.
"Private" - you have to specify the list of names or emails of people who can see those videos. In this case PMing won't work, because you need to know the person's youtube name or email to give them access.

 

[Sasha]

@onelittledream Good for you for getting her placed, and hope she shines and has a wonderful season at L4!

Don't let any negativity from other parents get to you. Try to be sympathetic despite what feels harsh. They have watched their daughters work hard for years to work up to L3 or L4, and have their own hopes and dreams for their children. They have watched, worried, posted on Chalkbucket, and eventually worked through struggles with pullovers, pointed feet and tight legs, mill circles, blocking off the springboard, back handsprings, getting-and-losing kips for 1, 2, 3 years or more. They have mentally agonized over move-ups, injuries, body type, and making the team....

Now, seeing someone else's child zoom ahead in the fast lane with likely a little "excitement and special attention" right now from the coaches has to sting a little. While you are fighting your battle to get your highly talented daughter placed properly (as you should), at that very same moment another proud parent is hoping today will be the day Susie finally gets her back handspring so she can compete this year. And if on that day or week the coaches' attention seemed to be more on your rising star than spotting Susie, feelings of injustice and sadness are bound to happen, and are easily magnified out of proportion due to passion for one's children. Additionally, though your new-to-gym daughter may have picked up skills easily, often it takes a little longer to get the form and precision just right, and since their daughters have been working on that for years, some might feel it's not fair to move someone to team who isn't yet caught up in that area (not to say she isn't, just that it's common).

So of course I'm not justifying any parents truly opposing your daughter's success - just musing on empathizing with the core of their emotions. Gymnastics is a very demanding and emotional sport for all involved. I hope in time you can make great friends and supporters at your gym!

 

[LIGYMMOM]

I seem to remember Rita Wieber (Jordyn Wieber's mom) covering a section in her book "Gym Mom" about dealing with jealousy from other parents. She has a lot of good info in her book for fellow gym moms, and might be a good book to pick up.

 

[Jenny]

When will her first meet be? You must be very excited!

 

[lovemygymnast]

I'm totally creeped about the person who contacted you wanting to see her Leo-less. I think you handled it very well. I just don't understand anyone targeting children or athletes like this!! All of my fb is set to private, friends only, but who knows if any fb friends are creepy like that or have a creepy boyfriend or spouse that used their computer? I would not post links to video's on this forum but pm someone you trust maybe? It's just so hard to know who anybody is on line.

 

[Flipflopz]

For Bog, can lurkers see the entire board here, and the social groups area? If so, is there a way to go back and delete former posts? I am not very comfortable

 

[Dr Maleficent]

Lurkers cannot read posts in the social groups area, and neither can members who are not part of that social group. The rest of the board is open (apart from a private coaches forum, I think).

 

[munchkin3]

If I think about lurkers too much, I start freaking a bit....the truth is, they are everywhere. There is really nothing you can do about it. There have been many times I search some 'gymnastics' term or skill on Youtube, and I get a lot of seedy gross hits. This sport is especially prone to it. It is pretty bad in the mens gymnastics too....there you get some very scary hits on youtube....I have also received very gross youtube messages as well and I immediately block...frankly I don't post stuff there that much anymore because I use FB instead.

If you start making everything private, then you might make the service unavailable to those who really need it! I just try to keep my kids aware of the online pitfalls, and watch what they are doing online.....part of the greatness of Chalbucket, is the new members and their great stories and experiences. Lurkers are everywhere. At the supermarket, around school, at the mall, at church.....My kids know what is acceptable behavior from adults, and what is not. At the end of the day, I always am grateful to know that my kids spend MOST of their free time in the gym, with their gym family! .....Other than that, they are with their family eating dinner of course.

 

[bogwoppit]

For Bog, can lurkers see the entire board here, and the social groups area? If so, is there a way to go back and delete former posts? I am not very comfortable

Lurkers can see everything but the private social groups.

Posts can be deleted, send me the links.

 

[onelittledream]

Congrats on the way things worked out. Hopefully, you can have a fun competitive season and see where it takes you. Good luck!

As to CGMs, we were around one for my daughter's entire gymnastics career. Some of the things she would get upset about really boggled my mind. Like others have said, she knew how many attempts each girl got or how many minutes they received instruction from the coaches and she would just fume. She would never really talk to the coaches, she would just talk about them. I got really good at looking like I was listening to her rants while I was actually making my shopping list I always thought she would change, but I eventually realized that this was her personality. She probably kept score on everything in her life. It was exhausting being an acquaintance. I can't imagine how her family and close friends managed. I guess the moral of my story is that sometimes these dramatic gym parents are just dramatic in everything they do. It might not go away, so you will learn how to avoid or deal with it.

True, it will not go away. It is very much the community in which we live also. Seriously first term report cards came out this week and it is not uncommon to see parents that hardly even know each other be comparing report card grades while they wait in line at the local market. Mine is better than yours and I am going to prove it" is the going rally cry. Believe me I am not all that sad to be (casually at this point) looking for transfers with my job to other towns or areas in my state (perhaps with higher ranked gyms).

But thank you I am sure this season will be fun and crazy all at the same time. Her hours have been upped at the gym and mine at work (we gotta pay all this after all) so I am sorry I have been absent the last few days.

 

[onelittledream]

@onelittledream Good for you for getting her placed, and hope she shines and has a wonderful season at L4!

Don't let any negativity from other parents get to you. Try to be sympathetic despite what feels harsh. They have watched their daughters work hard for years to work up to L3 or L4, and have their own hopes and dreams for their children. They have watched, worried, posted on Chalkbucket, and eventually worked through struggles with pullovers, pointed feet and tight legs, mill circles, blocking off the springboard, back handsprings, getting-and-losing kips for 1, 2, 3 years or more. They have mentally agonized over move-ups, injuries, body type, and making the team....

Now, seeing someone else's child zoom ahead in the fast lane with likely a little "excitement and special attention" right now from the coaches has to sting a little. While you are fighting your battle to get your highly talented daughter placed properly (as you should), at that very same moment another proud parent is hoping today will be the day Susie finally gets her back handspring so she can compete this year. And if on that day or week the coaches' attention seemed to be more on your rising star than spotting Susie, feelings of injustice and sadness are bound to happen, and are easily magnified out of proportion due to passion for one's children. Additionally, though your new-to-gym daughter may have picked up skills easily, often it takes a little longer to get the form and precision just right, and since their daughters have been working on that for years, some might feel it's not fair to move someone to team who isn't yet caught up in that area (not to say she isn't, just that it's common).

So of course I'm not justifying any parents truly opposing your daughter's success - just musing on empathizing with the core of their emotions. Gymnastics is a very demanding and emotional sport for all involved. I hope in time you can make great friends and supporters at your gym!

Very valid points, however I am trying to stay out of the gym as much as I can except for private lessons (which we decided to continue only because daughter was devastated at the thought of not doing them, and as a reward and with her own money). At the privates there are not many parents there.........I will be there for the meets and stuff and I am sure it will be tough but well, I guess it is going to be par for the course so I will also work on growing thicker skin!!!!

 

[onelittledream]

When will her first meet be? You must be very excited!

There is a meet this month and although she will be traveling with the gym she will not be competing this month. She will start actually competing in November.............I am a bit fuzzy on the meets there are compulsories and invitationals. Some are required some are not.........some you have to be actually invited to on top of also being on the team so.............I will say probably early November.