WAG Which way to go?

[Vivianflips]

I'd like to try out for team soon but my problem is the lower level coach at my gym is extremely rude! She yells way more than necessary and just is not nice to adults or kids in general. If there were other gyms in my area I might check them out but all of them are 30+ minutes away! Should I just deal with a rude coach or try the farther away gyms?
(My mom is willing to drive me to the farther gyms even though it's inconvenient)

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

What level are you training and how old are you?
What are the options for team where you are at? Xcel, JO, YMCA..? How about the other gyms further away?
Assuming you are slightly older than the average starting gymnast, what grounds do you feel you have to be accepted on team at the further away gyms? It would be unfortunate to make the decision to change gyms only to realize they wouldn't put you on team, KWIM?

In a perfect world, no coaches should yell or be mean, but could it be that the coach is loud and stern, but fair..? There's a big difference. If you walk into our gym and watch me coach a certain (large) group, I can guarantee you I will be loud (to make myself heard in a full gym with a large group of 5-8yo). Depending on what we are doing, you may even think me mean (during warmups especially when I tell them loudly to go faster, keep their legs straight etc...). I can assure you that nothing is further from the truth, I truly care about my little gymnasts and cheer louder than anyone when they succeed at something, and I'm also the one they go to when they are crying/hurt. I'm firm, I mean business but I also joke around and give them hugs. But, if all you see is a snippet of me during warmups you might think I'm yelling and mean..!

So take another look at this coach and see how the gymnasts respond to him/her. It may not be as bad of a situation as you think?

 

[Vivianflips]

I'm training level 2 and am 14, way older than the average level 2 that's for sure! My only option is USAG as no gyms in the area offer other programs. I will take some time to reevaluate this coach as you say, it's possible I'm just not accustomed to her coaching style. I'm used to the strict but kind type not so much the tough as nails ones! Thank you for the advice!

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I hope you find a way to pursue your dream, whether it is at this gym or another. As you can imagine, there are gyms who simply put wouldn't accept anyone out of the norm for starting age on team, so that is going to have to be a factor for you when choosing whether to stay (and put up with the coach if she does turn out to be as harsh as you think) or leave and try to get on team at one of the other gyms.
I have to say, I truly admire that you are going for it. At one of my DDs meets last year, there was a L3 who was surely 15 if she was a day. She was heads and shoulders above all the other 3's competing and clearly post-pubescent. I tell you, the whole audience was cheering for her!!! To come out there and compete, knowing she would stand out like that, took some serious guts. I was really impressed with her!

Best of luck to you, I hope you find a place where you can thrive!

 

[Vivianflips]

Thank you for all of your help! Fortunately the gym I'm at is willing to take older gymnasts on to their team

 

[Muddlethru]

I'd go to the best possible gym for you. That means good qualified coaches, a good program, the proximity is convenient enough so it does not cause any hardship to get to, you like the coaches and your teammates, etc. I would check out all the possible gyms and find the best fit.

As far as the yelling coach, everyone's personal experience is different and sometimes what we see is really not what it seems. My daughter's current coach had a reputation of yelling and making his gymnasts cry. My little daughter went to rec at the gym and told me there was no way she would be coached by him and literally decided not to pursue gym because of this coach. Further she could not believe I would switch her older sister from her old gym to this coach. It took My older daughter now LOVES the coach. He is not at all what people thought he was.

 

[NoDramaMama]

When my dd made a gym switch a few months ago, there was a coach who was tough and my dd ended up crying a few times. From an outsider point of view, she appeared wayyyy harsh. I arranged a few privates with the coach at my dd's request and now they are best buds (within reason - my dd still has a healthy fear of her). My point is that sometimes the coaches appear unreasonable and tough, but once you get to know them (and they know your work ethic) you realize that it's not so bad.

 

[Becauseisaid]

I may come across as harsh here, though it's not my intent.

In life you're going to have mean bosses, unfair teachers, spiteful colleagues, and coaches who just don't like you. It happens. As a 14 year old, you already know this to some extent. The strength of your character is what gets you through these things. You can only do what you can do. You cannot control other people. You cannot force someone to have a change of personality.

What you CAN do is take the opportunity given and work your hardest. Find the advice that helps (yes, even from a mean coach) and USE it. The question here is not whether you should go to a different gym for a warm and fuzzy coach, but whether this gym and this coach have something to offer you that you can use. Watch a practice and decide if her coaching is sound. Then decide.

Good luck.