Parents 5 stages of a gym parent - interesting read

[Faolmor]

Stage 1 here...looks like a rocky ride ahead!!

 

[Rapunzel]

I'm not progressing at the correct rate, I have been stuck on level 1 and I just can't see how I can progress with my current set up.
I have done lots of conditioning and reading and youtubing but I remain clueless. Will I ever make it to level 2? Should I switch gyms?

 

[wgymmom]

Stage 2, creeping into 3, though I do NOT point out flaws or complain to anyone but DH. I'd die before saying anything to other parents or the gym staff. I need to get to the "enjoy the ride" stage.

 

[skschlag]

I would say I am definitely in stage 5, but with occasional flashbacks into 4! looking forward to stage 6, although I think that i need to repeat 5 at least 1 more year.

 

[shelovestoflip]

I'm stage 6 but really skipped a lot of the craziness from 2-5! Picked the gym down the street and still there after all these years. My daughter is Level 9 this season and I agree with the posters who say really all I care about is that I don't get a call from the gym in the middle of practice and that my daughter stays happy and healthy.

I do miss the smiles and cluelessness of the younger days. When they get older, they realize what they are doing is dangerous!

 

[cbifoja]

I'm not progressing at the correct rate, I have been stuck on level 1 and I just can't see how I can progress with my current set up.
I have done lots of conditioning and reading and youtubing but I remain clueless. Will I ever make it to level 2? Should I switch gyms?

You're not practicing your "crazy" at home are you? Because crazy should only be practiced at the gym under supervision so that you don't get hurt or learn how to be the wrong kind of crazy.

 

[Rapunzel]

You're not practicing your "crazy" at home are you? Because crazy should only be practiced at the gym under supervision so that you don't get hurt or learn how to be the wrong kind of crazy.

Sage advice. I wouldn't want anyone around me getting hurt by mistimed crazy.
Although I had a glimmer of stage 3 psycho today 4wks before dds 4 piece comp they've changed all her routines/added completely new moves but then I reverted back to stage 1 clueless because I didn't know what half of the moves were . The old tale of 1 step forward, 3 steps back.

 

[profmom]

Add to stage 6. GP is much more concerned with DD surviving dangerous learning curve of true gymnastics flight( often including of D and possibly E elements), avoids watching practice and dreads middle of gym phone calls fearing season ending injury due to DD flying into immovable objects.

You know you're here when you feel your heart start pounding furiously and you stop breathing when you see the gym's phone number on your caller ID if your child is at the gym and you are not. I LOVE that our office manager, if she ever has to call under these circumstances, will preface the call along the lines of, "Hi, it's ____, and your daughter/son is NOT hurt."

 

[Midwestmommy]

Doesn't hold too true at our gym. The craziest one I can think of has been there quite a few years.... as has the second craziest. And the third craziest is a new level 3's mom. I see some normals and some crazies at all levels. I was looking more for the stage where I do a half confused dizzy spin in a parking lot trying to remember where my time and money all went and why there are so many miles on our car. And then I remember where I am, it slowly comes back to me. And then I feel my butt in my too tight jeans and here it comes.....the pledge. Again. I pledge to spend at least 50% of my daughter's hours in gym in my own gym getting getting in awesome shape. And then.... oh and I pledge to spend most of the other 50% volunteering or catching up with friends who may or may not recognize me anymore instead of shopping or with my nose in a book. Oh and then the ephiphany the other poster mentions, remember to slow down and enjoy this. For soon I will feel lonely when they are off to college.... remind myself to enjoy and savor these crazy times, and to give lots of love along with the lunches and more lunches and snacks and more snacks and water bottles. I see moms from all levels doing the spin dance with me in the parking lot. Time to round up the other zombie gym parents for a fun dinner out or something. Now where did I save that darn email list, why can't they all be on facebook where I can find them....

Oh and I couldn't a agree more with profmom, please please let any calls from the gym come when I know my daughter isn't there, otherwise I think it takes a few minutes off my life every time the number pops up....

 

[aerials]

CoachP is right on the money about the CGM's that are always proclaiming that they are the most sane ones....and they don't want to win they just want their DD's to be happy

 

[SignHere]

I believe I am currently in year 5 of crazy gym parent. I freely admit to having a SEVERE case of years 3and4.

However, a gym friend seems to be stuck in year 3 - and it's a bit hard to take.
I think I'm going to have to step back from my year 3 gym friends until they get a little less crazy!

 

[MaryA]

Ugh. HATE it when I see the gym's number come up on my caller ID! Also, there is a lovely coach at the gym with a medical background who always seems to be the one to "break the news" to parents when there's been an accident in the gym. Even though I like this woman very much, when she sees me come in to pick up DD and makes a b-line for me, my heart drops to my stomach.

I think there are variations of the stages depending on whether or not your child is having a "good" season or not. DD came out of having a very strong level 7 season and is now having a... um... challenging level 8 season (or should I say FIRST level 8 season, because I am sure there is at least one more to come). I actually find myself LESS uptight this year than I was last year. It is far easier to be laid-back about a meet when I know she has no chance of winning... no reason to check out the competition or to worry about anything other than is she improving and is she happy. So maybe a less-than-stellar year is helping me progress from a stage 5 to a stage 6 mom. But I have to say, I may be less stressed, but it's also less fun, and I would love to have the opportunity to test my newly acquired "stage 6" status with the challenge of a really great season next year!

 

[mommyof1]

They left preteam off the list:

My daughter is on preteam! She is talented at something! I must watch every practice to see what she is up to. The suspense is killing me--will she make it all the way up the rope today? Now will she make it all the way back down without falling off? Why isn't she in the group that is working on back handsprings today? She was in that group at the last practice. Why doesn't she have the pink leotard that some of the other girls have? They only told me to buy the blue one. What does the pink leotard mean? Do the ones with the pink leotard have more talent than my daughter? Oh, look! She is just so adorable up there on that big tall beam. But why doesn't she have a pink leotard?

 

[purpleleomom]

I'm so excited for developmental/preteam because now she stays long enough for me to leave during practice!

 

[kjvac]

Oh see, I'm just gifted. I got crazy *much* more quickly than year 3! I have all sorts of excuses primarily that she is so naturally talented (so others say) and I want the best for her. Now, after a gym move (but not because the grass was greener, simply a scheduling conflict) and DD stagnating quite a bit (not because of coaching, but her own stuff), I can finally relax some. She is going to do what she is going to do. Sometimes my head still goes crazy here and there, but I don't have to be a nut about it. I hope my fast progress through the levels doesn't mean I'll regress later.

 

[LMV]

I stumbled across this and thought it was pretty accurate...even made me take a step back and evaluate what I'm doing. I would say that I'm in stage 5 but still have a little of stage 4 in me.

-----

Want to know '5 Stages of a Gym Parent'? Where are you on the progression? ; ) (Come on, we've all been there!)

Gym Parents, year by year:
First year: CLUELESS: First year gymnasts (also known as Darling Daughter (DD)) are clueless, and Gym Parent(GP) is clueless. It's all fun and games. The novelty comes from wearing a leotard at a young age and getting their hair done for meets. GP has no clue about the sport, no concept of scoring, what body positions are, and are oblivious to other gyms in the area. They chose the one right down the street from their house. The focus is not on winning at all.....all concern is placed on their own DD and whether or not she will make it through the routine without running off the floor crying or having to go pee.

Second year: APPREHENSION: DD has gained some skills, and GP is starting to learn a little too. GP understands a little about scoring and is tickled that their DD has learned some skill. However, all DD's friends are learning new skills too and worry sets in about her DD keeping up, or falling behind. GP also starts to notice that other gyms in the area might have teams that are good and starts to question whether or not this gym is the BEST gym around. GP now knows DD will make it through a routine, and starts to crave winning.

Third year: PYSCHO: DD has gained more skills, and GP is excited but still nervous because some of DD's friends have gained more skills. GP starts putting pressure on DD to "get better", straight legs, pointy toes, body position, etc. GP is starting to understand scoring, now knows the routines by heart, and knows exactly who DD’s biggest competition is. GP wants DD to be on top of the podium! GP knows all the weaknesses of DD's gym, and will take every opportunity to point out those weaknesses!! Talk about changing gyms and bad coaching is rampant. GP is finding fault in every little thing and a thought creeps in about whether the grass is greener at other gyms. Complaints about other kids, coaches, methods, other parents, etc is at its peak!!!

Fourth year: PRESSURE: GP is still psycho, but DD is progressing even more and that is enough to keep GP happy. GP is into full fledged GYMANIA!! GP wants that win bad!!! Relationships with other GPs have developed, even GPs from other gyms. GP may still be putting tons of pressure on DD to fix this and that, get this and that. You want to be the best, right? DD may start to rebel against the pressure, straining their relationship and souring DD on gymnastics.

Fifth year: ACCEPTANCE: GP still has hidden anxiety but has stopped telling everyone about it. GP has met some other 3rd year psycho GP’s and realizes how insanely idiotic they act. GP has come to terms with their own DD's level and has started taking away the pressures, but still quietly encourages improvement. GP enjoys some quiet conversation with other 4+ year GP’s. GP fully understands by now what it takes to win, and has accepted that children develop in different stages. GP also understands now that kids will have strengths and weaknesses, including their own DD, and they can all contribute to the team beautifully. After all it is DD’s gymnastics…

Sixth year: ENJOYMENT: GP has settled nicely into a happy group of other veteran GP’s and laughs out loud at the 3rd year GP’s. GP still wants the win, but they now realize that winning is not everything. GP has found a peace with her DD, and gives her the tools she needs to succeed, but no longer pushes so hard. This peace continues through the rest of DD's career.

Obviously there are exceptions, and lots of them. Too bad we can't go from 1st year to 5th/6th year and skip the years in between… Maybe, just maybe reading this will help someone skip a stage or two.

CAPPAE – someone transitioning through the stages/years

Wasn't this originally making the rounds as the 5 stages of a Cheer Mom or something like that?

Ok, here, http://chalkbucket.com/forums/threads/stages-of-a-gym-mom-for-entertainment-purposes-only.33568/ [From MdGymMom01 who's daughter I believe started out cheering transitioned into gym and then transitioned into ballet/dance---she was still around a little when I first found this site]

 

[Flipflopz]

This is dd's 7th yr, she is in 7th grade. I laughed when I read these. . Not sure I see myself there though. I am presently at the "oblivious" stage.