Anon Am I worrying too much about a 6yr old?

[Anonymous (4935)]

DD just turned 6. She struggled with paying attention and coachability at her last gym. She has been doing gymnastics at a recreation level for a couple of years. She was consistently passed over for preteam and team due to lack of listening skills.

She does struggle with listening and station work and flat out refuses to follow certain coaches’ directions. The problem is she is amazingly well behaved for other coaches and we have zero problems in school.

I have recently moved her to a different gym. She was immediately put on their elite team (unsure what level is would be as it’s based on age here) and the coach said she hasn’t seen a child with as much talent and ability in a long time. The problem is this gym’s standards are significantly different than my daughter’s previous gym. I have noticed the girls’ forms are not tight, they don’t break down the moves into shapes and drills, and the atmosphere is extremely laid back. It’s not in the US, but I feel like it’s a Rec track bc all of the girls (including my daughter now) are SO happy. They laugh and have fun and i haven’t seen my daughter so excited about gymnastics is maybe a year!

I want to be happy because she is happy. Honestly due to her behaviour I really don’t have an option to keep her in the “better” gym because she is levelled so far down due to behaviour, it’s painful for everyone. The coaches have really tried to work with her there, but we were all frustrated to see how talent she is but not emotionally/cognitively capable of matching her physical abilities.

I guess I’m looking to see if anyone has gone this path before and how it turned out for them? My biggest concerns here is if she learns skills incorrectly and develops bad habits (she is in there doing back walkovers on a low beam as I type) and would have never been allowed to do one on the floor much less a beam at her old gym. Or worse, I’m afraid she’ll get injured from poor form.

We will move to the US in 18-24 months, so will also have to learn US standards, so I’m also worried about that.

Does anyone have any advice? She is happy and so I’m trying to be happy, but I’m also worried about injury and limiting her future opportunities. I’ve even considered a clean break (ie focus on another sport) might be better than learning bad habits.

Any thoughts or am I just being overly dramatic/anxious? I think she enjoys being a big fish in a small pond and having more freedom to try skills, and I realise she is 6- no D1 scholarships are being given out this week lol., But, I also believe she has significant talent and she is doing so well right now bc she had coaches that emphasised the details and moved at a glacial pace to ensure no injuries and perfect form.

 

[Anonymous (ac4a)]

This might be insensitive, but it's better to be clear and direct for your benefit. Your daughter just turned 6! The ability of anyone, even an Olympic coach to identify a 5 yo as an elite talent does not exist. Some precursors might indicate the potential to develop, but that is all it is, potential. Also, unless you are an ex-elite or high-level gymnast, I am skeptical that you can ascertain proper technique/form/talent at this age. I still don't know what the heck my DD does during training or competitions (I can name about 2 skills) and she has been doing this for close to 10 years. I can't remember but I don't think much was happening in the gym at age 5-6 other than tumbling over and doing splits. Ultimately, maybe your DD is super talented, but at this age it is irrelevant. Take what a coach tells you as a compliment, smile, and forget about it. Let her have fun and develop that way. There will be a time when you will have more relevant information and data points to guide you on the "I want her to reach her full potential" path., maybe 3 years from now. That is why USAG calls it the developmental program. Until then if she is happy and safe, then she is in a good place.

Also, proper form all day. Colleges value that over big skills and proper form keeps gymnasts safe from acute and repetitive injuries when they start doing those big girl skills. Proper form lays the foundation blocks to build up to harder skills. I have known some girls that have come to our gym and had to completely relearn a skill from the ground up because their form was so bad when they got here even though they could "do" said skill.

 

[Anonymous (c41b)]

Is the future of your family predicated on how she does in gymnastics? If she doesn't make the Olympic team someday is she going to be considered a failure in life?

The most important skill that any athlete needs to have is a desire to be great in their chosen sport. If she loves gymnastics there then let her love it. Relax - She won't be correctly/incorrectly learning any skills on pre-team that could stop her from being an upper level gymnast someday. There will be a time when strict attention will need to be paid to all portions of her skills, but that time is not at 6 years old.

 

[Anonymous (532e)]

She is six years old. She is moving and loving it. All is well. So yeah, I think you are overthinking this. Let her be a kid. You already tried the stern approach with her at the other gym, it did not work at all. So what's there to loose at the moment?

 

[Dahlialover]

A child has to fall in love with a sport before they can excel in it. If your child is loving gymnastics, then she is on the right track.

 

[Anonymous (cf9e)]

The OP is in the UK. Kids there get sorted into "elite", "national", "regional" etc at a young age. By saying her daughter was put in the elite stream, the OP is not claiming her child will be elite one day, just that she is being taught skills a ta rate to keep her on track to potentially become an elite some day.

That said, I think that at the age of six, if she is loving it, all is well. Especially since you are going to be moving to a different club in a completely different system in a couple of years anyway. Worst case scenario, she learns some bad habits, which she might have to unlearn at her new club at age 8. Not ideal, but certainly far from the end of the world, and imo worth it over a club where she cannot get out of rec and is hence having much less fun.

An 8 year-old, talented enough to be doing back walkovers on low beam at six, is not going to be turned away from a US club because of possibly less than ideal training for the two years prior, if the latter is even the case. It could just be that the other club is obsessive about form - while proper form and technique is important, there is also a balance to be struck with the little ones between that and fun.

So long waffle, but I would also vote for letting her have fun and not worrying.

 

[aisu20]

Was she not listening at the old gym because she was bored? If she’s talented and was itching to do harder skills, she may have not seen the point in all the drills and slow pacing and just decided she wasn’t doing it.

Like people said, she’ll be fine. You’re moving to the US anyway, so you can look for a gym at that point that matches her goals. If she decides to get on the elite/serious JO path, worst case scenario she’ll have to devote some time to fixing up her form, but since she’ll still be young, that won’t be the make or break at all if she’s talented enough to go elite/L10. Of course good form is important, but it’s also important that she develop a love of gymnastics and the general coordination and flexibility required to progress in the sport. All the perfect form in the world won’t make a difference if she’s burnt out at the ripe old age of 7.

 

[Anonymous (9a2a)]

I agree with everyone here, if she's enjoying it, let her keep at that. If she shows clear potential and desire to excel, she still has plenty of time to transfer to somewhere she can exploit that.
Physical talent is only one part of the formula to success.

 

[Anonymous (cf9e)]

Th OP is in the UK where children get sorted into elite/national/regional/vault&floor/etc at a young age. Nowhere did they claim the daughter was an elite gymnast. Elite in the UK means they are being taught at a pace so that, if they can keep up, they can become an elite at some point.

To the OP, you will be at this club for two years at most. No US club will turn down an 8 year-old with the talent to be doing back walkovers on low beam at age 6 based on them possibly not having had the absolute ideal training between ages 6 and 8. Worst case scenario, she might pick up some bad habits and will need to unlearn them. Not ideal, but hardly the end of the world. This is if she is even picking up bad habits - technique is important but when it comes to form there is a balance to be struck with the really little ones between trying to get them to do things with good form and letting them have fun while trusting that once they develop more body awareness, things like tighter legs, pointed toes, etc., will follow more easily. (Disclaimer: I am not a coach, but this is the impression I am getting.)

The one thing I would say is that I would be concerned if she were doing tons of walkovers at this age, given the risk of future back problems.

Apart from that, I would choose her having great fun at this age over being at a super strict club where she cannot cope with the training environment and is hence kept in rec. So I am with everyone else who is saying "don't worry".

 

[Anonymous (4935)]

The OP is in the UK. Kids there get sorted into "elite", "national", "regional" etc at a young age. By saying her daughter was put in the elite stream, the OP is not claiming her child will be elite one day, just that she is being taught skills a ta rate to keep her on track to potentially become an elite some day.

That said, I think that at the age of six, if she is loving it, all is well. Especially since you are going to be moving to a different club in a completely different system in a couple of years anyway. Worst case scenario, she learns some bad habits, which she might have to unlearn at her new club at age 8. Not ideal, but certainly far from the end of the world, and imo worth it over a club where she cannot get out of rec and is hence having much less fun.

An 8 year-old, talented enough to be doing back walkovers on low beam at six, is not going to be turned away from a US club because of possibly less than ideal training for the two years prior, if the latter is even the case. It could just be that the other club is obsessive about form - while proper form and technique is important, there is also a balance to be struck with the little ones between that and fun.

So long waffle, but I would also vote for letting her have fun and not worrying.

Thank you sooo much! Yes it’s UK streams. She definitely isn’t US elite, it’s their term so thank you for clarifying that. The last gym was brilliant but obsessive about form. The good thing is I had absolute trust and confidence because they were OBSESSED with not even doing full skills until much later. She can do back and front walk overs in the low beam but they would never meet her old gym’s standard on the floor and they don’t really even let the 8 yr olds do them, much less the 6 yr olds. It’s honestly all made me also very cautious. But I don’t feel like I can completely stop her either. We do t have a garden trampoline but she’s used them at friends homes, will try all kinds of things when I’m distracted in the the garden. She doesn’t do crazy things obsessively but will throw a back handspring on the neighbour’s trampoline if not watched and warned. Thank you for your words of encouragement. I really just don’t want her to get injured. I wasn’t a gymnast and this isn’t my passion- it’s definitely hers again now that she has more freedom at the new gym. I will keep close contact with the coach and hopefully build up trust.

 

[Anonymous (4935)]

This might be insensitive, but it's better to be clear and direct for your benefit. Your daughter just turned 6! The ability of anyone, even an Olympic coach to identify a 5 yo as an elite talent does not exist. Some precursors might indicate the potential to develop, but that is all it is, potential. Also, unless you are an ex-elite or high-level gymnast, I am skeptical that you can ascertain proper technique/form/talent at this age. I still don't know what the heck my DD does during training or competitions (I can name about 2 skills) and she has been doing this for close to 10 years. I can't remember but I don't think much was happening in the gym at age 5-6 other than tumbling over and doing splits. Ultimately, maybe your DD is super talented, but at this age it is irrelevant. Take what a coach tells you as a compliment, smile, and forget about it. Let her have fun and develop that way. There will be a time when you will have more relevant information and data points to guide you on the "I want her to reach her full potential" path., maybe 3 years from now. That is why USAG calls it the developmental program. Until then if she is happy and safe, then she is in a good place.

Also, proper form all day. Colleges value that over big skills and proper form keeps gymnasts safe from acute and repetitive injuries when they start doing those big girl skills. Proper form lays the foundation blocks to build up to harder skills. I have known some girls that have come to our gym and had to completely relearn a skill from the ground up because their form was so bad when they got here even though they could "do" said skill.

Sorry- poor word choice- I didn’t mean US elite. We aren’t in US yet- my guess is she’s a L1 or L2 in US but I don’t know.