MAG First time Head Coach looking for pointers...

[Coach Pat]

just took over as head coach in July and I need a few tips on the following:

• dealing with parents
• sensitive/emotional gymnasts
• behavior problems
• lethargic/apathetic performance

thanks in advance for your help!

 

[skschlag]

So, more specifics might be helpful..

But..welcome! Congrats on your new position

As for dealing with parents, set up a communication system and use it. Be honest, and up front, but tactful. Some parents will need/want more info than others. Be approachable, but not to the detriment of the gymnasts.

Sensitive: I will defer to others on here who have gymnasts like this, but I can say that you have to validate their feelings, but encourage them to continue. Heavy handedness will not typically work in this situation. you have to be firm, but understanding. But again, I will defer on this one.

Behavior: Have lots of stations. Boys need to keep moving, especially younger ones. So if you can keep them busy, there will be less trouble.

 

[John]

Congratulations! My two cents follows.

• dealing with parents

Find your way, whats true to you. Talk face to face or email, you choose but be aware both have their positives and negatives. With that said be open, truthful, and supportive do your best to be available even if just for 1 or 2 minutes at a time.

• sensitive/emotional gymnasts

Learn each gymnast and remember sensitive gymnasts care very very much about what they are doing. The tears or disappointment being shown can come from feelings that they are letting themselves and you their coach down. My gymnast is a female but very sensitive. The other night she was crying while doing the floor, it was a bad day. The floor coach told her sternly, "you can't be perfect every day its ok to get corrections." DD instantly stopped her tears and smiled. Take away DD knew her coach had faith in her ability.

• behavior problems

Set the guidelines and stick to them. Once every boy knows what you expect they will follow the rules or get the consequences. Of course, consequences must match the crime.

• lethargic/apathetic performance

Tough one here. Everyone has a bad day? Do they need some food? Are they thinking they want to quit? Take the gymnast aside and praise his normal performance then ask him what is bothering you today? Good coaches communicate and care, they are not authoritarians.

 

[profmom]

You may need to fine tune your approach depending on the ages and groupings of your athletes. Boys can be tougher not so much because of gender but because boys' teams are smaller and you have a bigger range of ages and skills working out together in the same group. What works for teenage upper optionals may not work as well for preteen compulsories. I'd say that for older athletes, creating and maintaining a culture of respect and support is absolutely critical, both between coach and individual athletes and among athletes. The other guys can be the best weapon you have for retention in a program or the worst challenge. Any time you can sneak some team-building into your workouts, it's good to do so.

I think most parents just want transparency. When you make decisions that will have a significant impact -- level/division at which a guy will compete, workout scheduling and groups, etc. -- you'll probably get less pushback if it's pretty clear to everyone what you're doing and why you're doing it. "Johnny is competing Division 1 because he has at least two bonuses on every event and Sam is not because he only has three bonuses on one event and no bonuses on floor" will go over way better than "Johnny is a stronger gymnast than Sam." Likewise "Joe will switch to JO from JD once he has all of his group requirements on pbars" is easier to defend than "Joe is not ready for JO." And if you can find a few parent allies, they can make your life easier by running some interference for you behind the scenes. Try not to take the crazy parents personally, but do keep an eye on whether they are creating a poisonous atmosphere in the gym. If that's happening, you should deal with it.

 

[lilmisssunshine]

Welcome! By asking around about these things, you're setting yourself up for success. Here are some of my thoughts:

• dealing with parents

Words matter. Prof mom had some good suggestions. But even here, you used the words "dealing with" which sort of sets up
an adversary relationship. I'm assuming that most of your parents aren't overly pushy and you really meant communicating?
Let parents know the best way to get in touch with you. Some people prefer phone, email, text, or in-person. Go with what you
want, but make sure there's time built into the day/practice for this to happen. It's sometimes hard when a group of boys is
finishing and another group is starting. So in-person communication can feel rushed.
Our coach sends a weekly email that's really nice (and makes other parents here jealous). It's never a big deal. Usually a reminder
of practice times, updates on meets or payments, and often a "video of the week".

• sensitive/emotional gymnasts

Back off. Give the kid space, but check in after a while. You should never say things like, "There's no crying in gymnastics" or "man up".
Ask, "Do you need to take a break?" or say, "Why don't we stop this for now and try again next practice?"

• behavior problems

Busy kids don't get into trouble. If you're trying to work with a lot of kids at once, set up stations rather than having a long line of
kids waiting their turn. If you're getting back-talk, try to find out what the real issue is. Remember that kids aren't inherently jerks,
but they can act that way when their needs aren't being met (and needs might be hunger, a feeling of control with school, or a sense
that their coach values them as a person.)

• lethargic/apathetic performance

Some kids just aren't that into it. Sometimes you just have to respect the fact that just as you'll have some kids who are go-go-go
at gymnastics all the time, you're probably going to have a few in the program because they like the tumbling part (but don't care
for other apparatus) or who are just there because a sister does gymnastics and it's easier on the parents if the boy does it too.
Sometimes a kid will appear apathetic because he doesn't think that he could ever be as good as the super-star kids, so he doesn't
feel like he's a worthwhile member of the team.
Our coach ends each practice by having each boy say something he did well that day. He focuses on the kids as they speak, then shakes
their hands after. I think that really makes the kids feel valued and he has a lot of kids who work hard but will probably never
be stand-out gymnasts.

Another idea to pull in that doesn't necessarily fit into your categories is the idea of growth mindset and/or grit. Those are popular
concepts right now and gymnastics is the perfect opportunity to learn perseverance.

I think it could also be helpful for you to get a general sense of proper child development. I mean, I know you've been through it
but a lot of adults don't have a good sense of where kids should be at different ages, and this sets up unreasonable expectations.
For instance, if your behavior problems are occurring in a class of 4-6 year olds, you might need to have a faster pace when it
comes to switching the activities.

 

[Jard.the.gymnast]

Our coach ends each practice by having each boy say something he did well that day. He focuses on the kids as they speak, then shakes
their hands after. I think that really makes the kids feel valued and he has a lot of kids who work hard but will probably never
be stand-out gymnasts.

Our coach always does a gymnast of the evening. That can be someone who did a back handspring for the first time on the trampoline by themselves (any new skill usually, especially of someone struggled with It for a while) but also someone who had a rough practice and didn't stop working (more for work-ethic)

 

[Coach Pat]

Thanks all for your well thought out responses.

 

[Bet Winner]

The sensitive ones will likely respond better to enthusiastic coaching and encouragement rather than more stern coaching. (Most of that already said I think.)

 

[CoachS]

Instead of writing a long reply, as I was doing, feel free to PM me and we can talk/text over the phone. It's just easier for me, lol. I've been the head men's coach of a program for 5 going on 6 years now in NJ. I'm always looking to help.