WAG Flyaway mental block

[LGnyc]

No one suggested "get over it". The suggestions have been...... it will come back. These are 2 different things

No one has suggested that it is not a big deal to the child.

Agreed. Just talking in hypotheticals, and what a parent or coach MEANS vs what a child HEARS. Sometimes when I child hears this is normal, they think there is something wrong with them that they are upset. And it's okay to be upset. But also agreed, you don't make a big deal of it. You listen and help them move on. Which is what was suggested.

 

[duyetanh]

It's so hard for me to picture being able to do giants, but scared to flyaway. It's obviously not a fear of going upside down. Have y'all asked them what exactly they're scared of: underrotating, coming too close to the bar, or something else?

It is 100 times scarier honestly, because when they do those damn giants, they are (please God) still connected to the bar. Then from the top of the bar, all of a sudden instead of hanging on, they have to train the brain to do exactly what they have been told not to do with giants.
It is very, very hard. And scary as hell.

 

[UnoMas]

Unfortunately, patience. There is no way to speed up the passing of a mental block. I spent the greater part of 3 years waiting for my daughter to believe that she could do giants. Once she believed it, she did it and connected them right away to her dismount. Bars became her best event at the end of her career. It was a long 3 years but I honestly believe not one thing other than patience would have gotten her to do those stupid giants.

 

[Canadian_gym_mom]

How do I help my 10yo DD deal with a major mental block on her giant-flyway? She's been very frustrated and her mental state is getting worse after each practice. She competed cast- flyaway all season last year and then had giant-flyaway for about 3 months. She's lost everything now and won't even go for the flyaway with a spot. Coach has been working with her on the basics - she only goes for the pushaway-flyaway and only from the low bar. I realize that there's not much I can do as a parent besides listening to her, supporting her etc. but maybe someone can share their story or useful advice? Thank you!

You never ever mention the words flyaway, block or even bars .

 

[Mish]

No good advice but what has already been mentioned here. Current situation: dd is repeating lv 6 because she stressed on getting the giant in time to move up, got it, fell horribly on it, and did not attempt another one for almost 2 months. She "forgot" how to do it. Her current (new) coach has been AMAZING on getting her to do the progressions leading up to it, and last practice she did it heavily spotted on on pit bar. That whole process went from immobilizing fear to building back the confidence. She was more than disappointed not to go to lv 7 (all other events ready but they need a giant for 7 in our gym, no leeway on this), but not enough to get over her very real fear/block. I learned a HUGE lesson about keeping it in the gym and letting her take the lead, while still being supportive and caring. I'm sure I have holes in my tongue from biting it.

Hopefully her coaches are working through this at a pace which is comfortable enough to build her confidence and skill. Keep us posted.

 

[e'smum]

Dd scared of hitting her feet on the bar. She also says that she's coming very fast out of the giant

that's my daughter's latest "fear".... part of her problem is she's releasing at the wrong time.

 

[e'smum]

we are going through the same thing. she did them all last year as a lvl 6 (CH flyaway). got the giant, flyaway in early spring and then stopped doing them. i figured out it happened over the summer when she had the bruise on her lower abdomen and quit doing bars while it healed.

she just got them again and had them, doing great for the last 1.5-2 weeks and then all of a sudden, on monday, couldn't do giants anymore. scared of hitting feet on the bar (she's never done) and falling on her back during the flyaway (which she has done before and i reminded her it didn't hurt). came home all upset. first meet is dec 9th.

so we scheduled a private and she had it tonight and all she did for a full hour was giant, giant flyaway from the top bar. she was spotted by her coach and the goal is repetition to build up confidence. she will have another private next week and the week after that if necessary. so glad we had the private tonight b/c they didn't even get to bars tonight for practice. she came up with goals to work towards which will hopefully have her ready to go for the first meet.

i told her time and time again she wasn't the first one to have this happen to her. that a few of the girls in the upper levels started off last season with this issue.

other than listening and giving her a hug and telling her it's ok to be upset, not much more you can do as a parent. but i feel your pain. literally!

 

[Perlma]

Update: Dd had a private today and she did a bunch of giant-flyaways (granted, with a light spot but it's still a huge step forward for her). First, the coach stacked up all the mats and did a ton of drills when you just let go and fall on your back. She did drill after drill and then took mat away one by one and at the end she did it with no mats. I haven't seen my daughter this happy in weeks. I hate how this sport controls her emotions. I realize that it can disappear again tomorrow but trying to focus on the positive now!

 

[vbdb]

This is my DD 100%. She can only do a flyaway tucked, as soon as they move it to piked or layout she lets go too early. it's a fear of hitting her toes off the bar. She had a huge growth spurt last year and is just a really long kid, they changed her from tucked abruptly and she's never been able to do it without a spot since then. She can do giants no problem, but ask her to let go of the bar???? no way! so she's doing level 6 this year and will start the season with a step down from handstand and then let go (not sure what that's called). On the bright side, she likes doing a flyaway out of the cast away better than out of tap swings like level 5, she gets more momentum and feels better about it, but the gym won't let her do it tucked so she's doing the other dismount until she's ready to do the flyaway laid out.
We just don't talk about it anymore, she was hugely relieved to find out she didn't need to do it for level 6 right away and they're just taking their time with her, she's still working on them and is doing them on the pit bar with her coach just standing next to her. Baby steps

 

[LGnyc]

DD also had a private. She's nowhere near the giant flyaway, but is starting to get back her cast flyaway. So on the high bar she will do a kip cast handstand, giant, kip (no handstand), cast, flyaway layout. And as often happens, as she starts to get the feel of it, she actually reports it's kinda fun. And I kinda want to tear my hair out. But I smile and say that's great.

 

[jenjean70]

How do I help my 10yo DD deal with a major mental block on her giant-flyway? She's been very frustrated and her mental state is getting worse after each practice. She competed cast- flyaway all season last year and then had giant-flyaway for about 3 months. She's lost everything now and won't even go for the flyaway with a spot. Coach has been working with her on the basics - she only goes for the pushaway-flyaway and only from the low bar. I realize that there's not much I can do as a parent besides listening to her, supporting her etc. but maybe someone can share their story or useful advice? Thank you!

Oh my goodness- this sounds like my son a few years ago. He was doing layout flyaways out of giants and just before his first meet he pulled in and hit his shins on the bar. He had to relearn the flyaway out of a tap swing to compete the remainder of that season. The next season he was doing them again. Then last season the coaches wanted him to move up a level and the difficulty of the skills they were asking him to do put him in freeze mode and he not only wouldn't go for the new skills but he wouldn't go for the old skills either. The coaches didn't understand his fear/freeze response and thought he was being defiant. (We were watching the episode of Stranger Things where Will said that he would freeze in front of the monster and the Dr. said you get cold or scared and he said scared- like I can't make my body do what I want it to- and my very quiet son says "I know what that feels like")...After the regression I talked to the coaches and they talked to my son and my son decided to stay in the level he was in for a 3rd year....That took the pressure off of him and he could take his time to learn the skills. He recently had his mock meet for optionals and he's doing skills he was scared of last year. He still has fear and will freeze sometimes but he is able to get himself through it and attempt the skills faster than he otherwise would have. I didn't understand the fear/ freeze response before but I am aware of it now. You have to let things be for awhile and let them work through it. Bringing attention to it feeds the monster. The coaches and I fed DS monster until it was almost unmanageable. Now we know. Good luck.

 

[meganliz77]

Unfortunately, patience. There is no way to speed up the passing of a mental block. I spent the greater part of 3 years waiting for my daughter to believe that she could do giants. Once she believed it, she did it and connected them right away to her dismount. Bars became her best event at the end of her career. It was a long 3 years but I honestly believe not one thing other than patience would have gotten her to do those stupid giants.

Your DD's struggle and accomplishment gives me hope that my DD will overcome her fear of anything backwards on beam... it's been a long year.... ... watching your kiddos struggle is SO hard. Thanks for sharing your DD's success!